Beauty requires sacrifices, and the brain flies first to the altar.

XXX: And my cat started screaming like mad. It’s so ugly, Blake.
Zzzz: So you give her anti-catties! and :)
XXX does not help.
She is around Kashka (the old cat) and so and so - her ass is shaken, and he is at least henny - lovingly looking at the refrigerator!

to this:

to this:
You know that in Spanish it is ohuela.

So now we have an Ohuel week =))
----------------
ah, and in Spanish "In July blinkers will eat" - "In Julio Pidaras Ohuelos")))))

You don’t know the language, why write? This phrase sounds like En Hulio Artarse de Ohuelos.

And PedirAs is "you will ask". Yes it is funny. And Mandaras - you will order, and Perdi - I lost. And a lot more.
Brothers of Languages

by J:
It is said that on the day of St. Valentine many single people find their half would you like?

M is :
I can’t find two identical socks in the closet and you’re talking about the other half.

Zzzz is fucking. I was very pleased with Dr. Blonde.
by Scuco. I, he says, had some suspicious scrap in the printer, so I decided to lubricate it: I lubricated the sheet with butter and passed through the printer and now it started to lubricate somehow...
Dumb all the printer and cartridge in butter oil, and when printing the sheets are fat and tasty smell of oil...
I don’t even know how this is shameful to give service.
When asked how much oil it took to lubricate, gram 100 answered.

XXX is
What is this real???? to

and ZZZ:
I even picked up the cartridge.
How fucking it can be fired.

From one forum:

I bought the N82 in perfect condition and very cheap.I couldn't understand why I was so lucky.After 4 days I understood what the dog went into.The lower speaker didn't work.Well, I started to bite the internet, in search of a way out of the situation.A lot of all kinds of advice, from the service, to the spray.I don't trust the service, better than anyone will do.But here was a guy, vulgar, but I am immensely grateful to him for his vulgarity. In short, to forgive my administrators, he advised to suck the phone in the lower part of it, where the holes under the speaker.Well, I gathered all my male pride in the fist, squeezed my lips into the phone and began to suck hard. After the specified time, the phone apparently caught a catch and stunned already on 2 speakers so that the vibration went.I did not believe in happiness and turned it off.After half an hour of sweet waiting, turned on.All speakers are working.The display is so glowing of happiness.The problem has gone.The only thing I have is a question about the work of the speaker.I think it works quietly.It's all so or do I suck again?))

Q: Can you buy a headphone for your ear?
YYY: Do you think?
You are constantly driving.
For other drivers?
XHH : No. by phone
yyy: aaa... just if on other drivers, then better not the headphone, but the speaker.
YYY: It would be funny... he’s roaring on you... and you get the speaker, turn on the full and answer him with a smooth voice on the entire crossroads: "SENDED TO HER, MUDILO!!and "
No need for garment. I want a speaker.

She put the yeast on her clothes and went to sit behind the compot, soon the cat fell, one lay on the upper layer of the computer table, and the other on her knees.
It’s been 10 minutes, I feel the Azzic smell and I understand that these cockroaches are spinning.
I go out of their rooms and see in the corridor white tracks to the kitchen, I go in there and I understand that the cat has eaten all the pasta.
The butterfly has arrived, yopta!

In the office brought a new note, it looks like a girl (blonde) and thrown on it one single look says
You are dual core!! to
(To note, the note is actually dual-core)
Everyone is in shock, and on the question how did you decide??? Responded
It’s very simple, there are two buttons.
Finger on the tachpad.
Office under the table

It is foolish to laugh at other people’s problems when they have their own.

It is time to repent of the sins of youth.
As a student, he lived in a shelter and was forever cold hungry, because there was no stable halture. Periodically donated blood for grandmothers, but it is, of course, not a profit. Even for the cheap student dining room, where they were then fed literally for a penny, these very pennies were lacking.
But that time I scratched for lunch and went to the belly party. From the second meal, again because of the lack of funds, I could and refuse, but from hot cheeks - never. They were usually released by the same fat, thoughtful, dreamy aunt. On the right of it, on the stand, stood a chan with the most liquid strains, above the layer - a hill of empty plates, and on the left.
A plate with pieces of meat. Releasing the client, she took an empty plate, threw one piece of meat from a plate there, and then poured two half-pounds of liquid. And here I approach her in a position, and she, as usual, looks dreamingly far away, probably thinking of the dullness of earthly existence, and poured two slices of cheeks, but not into an empty plate, but into one that is filled with meat by battle! I swallowed my saliva and conscience, silently took this plate and sat down in the corner so that no one would hinder me from enjoying corruption.
Craving and pressing, I sublime eaten all these about 25-30 servings.
A bad deed, of course, and God has punished me: I have never been so lucky again.

Responding to a business call, saying “what”, “yes” and “what shit” has become old-fashioned. In the dictionary of the intelligent man there is the right word:
“I wake up.”
To unwanted questions that are asked to answer, "and you fucking?" There is a wonderful phrase: “And you, the crash, what sadness?”
A whole series of idiomatic expressions, such as: “Fuck your mother” or “Well, fuck yourself” is replaced by the phrase: “It’s painful to hear,” pronounced with Shakespeare’s tragedy.

Kusturica: I am making a video for Teacher of the Year. The file is called UG.avi, and the movie is not very good.

Who invented February 23 for two days before the advance, and March 8 - two days before the receipt?

From Wikipedia:
Ninja Turtles first appeared on the pages of a graphic novel published by Mirage Studios in 1984. The idea of mutant turtles came to two friends, Kevin Eastman and Peter Lard, one evening when they were drawing comic drawings together and eating mushrooms.

You realize the magnitude of your loneliness when you are drunk and have no one to call.

Do you have a couple at what time they start?
UK is different. It is said that there are those who start at 8-30.
UK: I’ve never been like that.

- Your cat with the blame of some kind of milk from the cheek slides.
My cat looks like a pig.

xxxxxxxxxxx:
The friend burned... found his wife in the bag a lubricant...they don’t use it...without a burn began to watch...with the time her volume decreased, he took and poured super glue there....
xxxxxxxxxxx:
The doctors took 8 hours to get her off from her lover XD

About the graffiti...
People listen to. I am so glad that I finally got the money for the idea. And stop watering the dirt that you have no idea about. "Fake science", "Shame" and so on. You will burn Manchikov even more on fire, like Giordano Bruno. I personally work with torsion engines. They really exist. And if they are not described by Newton’s laws, then why shouldn’t the laws be supplemented, and not humiliated by people who actually invent new things in science? I’m just hurt to hear foolish, unfounded complaints against brilliant people.
Not funny, but please raise it to the best, let these commenters be ashamed at least a little.