bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №99635
 24.06.2014
With this weather, I will walk around Tamriel and the surrounding area all summer.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №99634
 24.06.2014
The authorities of Ukraine will stop broadcasting Life News, REN TV and “TV Center”

What did the RN-TV do? Are aliens going to jump?

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №99633
 24.06.2014
In the light of the law on foreign words discussed, they decided that "bag" is "isyan", and "incident" is "confusion".

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №99632
 24.06.2014
SeaGlass: She has trouble, her daughter needs to marry. and urgently. She has been together for six months and is not yet married. and she is twenty-five, the old virgin - well, and then the monologue on the

Cooke: SeaGlass, your relative is not our neighbor? The same song, word in word ;D

Anna C: This is just a very popular hit ::)

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №99631
 24.06.2014
I am old fashioned. I always write twelfth time.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №99630
 24.06.2014
I remember my sister (also a puppet) married a Moscovite. A great and mutual love. But for the boy’s parents (all indigenous Moscovites, whose grandparents are also from Moscow) my sister was a prostitute who married their son solely for the sake of a Moscow license. You would see these letters that they wrote to us with the demand to take this b***" from them. When I arrived myself, it turned out that a bunch of people in the house — almost all of them Moscovites — were heatedly supported and my sister simply hated.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
And what about the sister’s husband, the same who is “by mutual and great love”?
could not protect a loved one from relatives, or to the extreme, to go to live separately?

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №99629
 24.06.2014
From the Space:
Akella: I want to say that law enforcement in our country is a big deficit, and the work is associated with a lot of risk, and just as few people treat the police with respect. I wanted to go to work as a commissioner of criminal investigation, but it stopped what I was very well explained by a major who accepted that this job is not normalized...everyone believes that the employee should be crystal clean... For example, with two administrative law violations you will not be accepted, even with neighbors you can not argue... You need to be kind and affectionate with marginal personalities who 30 minutes ago raped someone or something like that... spend on search activities your own funds... It is good that in our country there are still superheroes in the face of even not many employees!
Stealight: Hans Christian Anderson, you are not a relative by chance?

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №99628
 24.06.2014
Not Orthodox, but Orthodox. These are different people...
--------
Clarification is accepted! At the time of writing, this word came out of my head.
To all the normal Orthodox – my sincere apologies!!! to

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №99627
 24.06.2014
Not so :

My 10 year old doesn’t eat what I’m cooking. I cook very well. But every day there is a spaghetti without everything I can)) and everything else he doesn't like.
I look forward to his student time, preferably in another city. That’s when he remembers his mother’s bore!!! and :)

— — —
That's when he'll have a habit of living on one pasta)))

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №99626
 24.06.2014
here here :

I know polypropylene, I can understand homopolypropylene, but copropylene! COPRO-scuco-Pilen - my Moscow refuses to say this even about himself!
Yes, you are a psychic. A normal name for any plastic made in China. Do you behave like shit? and yes. It smells? The fact. To touch fast? His name is copied.
Oh yeah, if so...

===
Nico, we had a announcement at the company for almost two weeks about the upcoming "coprative" I am afraid to go there...

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №99625
 24.06.2014
I’m not wrong – I make risky decisions.
I am not late, I am being delayed by important things.
I don’t forget – I don’t burn my memory with excessive information.
I don’t drink – I tasting.
Zzz: I’m not shaking – I’m masturbating.
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I will not write you anything anymore.
zzz: well be sure)

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №99624
 24.06.2014
My 10 year old doesn’t eat what I’m cooking. I cook very well. But every day there is a spaghetti without everything I can)) and everything else he doesn't like.
I look forward to his student time, preferably in another city. That’s when he remembers his mother’s bore!!! and :)

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №99623
 24.06.2014
Giuseppe_Verdi: The idea of dismissal came to my mind precisely at the moment when the boss seriously offended me for coming to work on the weekend (!) A day in jeans.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №99622
 24.06.2014
here here :

A colleague enters the office:
Do you dream, sweetheart?
We, the wretched horses
- We smell, Ivan Ivanovich, Monday is a heavy day!
For me this is the most beautiful day! I can rest for five days.
- O_O
From the village!

and +++
I work in a service shift (if everything is properly arranged, and usually it is, then there is nothing to do at work, only to be present, such as little or nothing...), and at home in the sweat of the face I do capital repairs. In the evening to go to work, in the night shift, I say to my wife: - I am to work... I will rest at least a little.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №99621
 24.06.2014
Imagine a company that has been working in the oil service market for more than forty years, submitting applications for participation in tenders to accompany drilling and oil and gas production, and has multi-billion-dollar annual contracts.
and the materials of their searches is transmitted to customers in packets with the logo of the nearest supermarket
Only in Russia.

[ + 26 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №99620
 24.06.2014
The Friday. The department is preparing to sit at the festive table. A call from a neighboring unit - Americans have arrived, asking to give access from outside to their equipment. I am going to find out what they want. I’m here to meet Tom. The dialogue:

I: Tom, let’s not fanatize, we’re already sitting at the table.
T : Why? It is 12 hours, working day.
Today is a celebration throughout the country!! to
T: What one?
Day of the Soviet Army - February 23.
T: But today is only 21st!!!? to

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №99619
 24.06.2014
And I would like to say something, but still about the roads it is better to quote quietly... and not hesitating...
Chelyabinsky road builders used self-colour in the construction of the road instead of a slice. This conclusion was reached by the experts of Rosfinnadzor, checking the quality of the M5 route. It turned out that during the reconstruction of one of the sections of the track "Ural" instead of a slug it was filled with precious mineral - serpentine.
The cost of the sludge, which must be used for the removal of roads, in the Chelyabinsk region is 400 rubles per ton. The serpentine or serpentine stone is worth at least 3 thousand. rubles per tonne. That is, this article of costs during reconstruction was more than seven times higher than usual. The larger the fraction of the stone, the higher its cost. In the regional administration of Rosfinnadzor, we were told that a very large fraction was used in the construction of the road, practically a rock.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №99618
 24.06.2014
The post is about a Japanese legend, where a girl with a cut mouth asks if she is beautiful, and if you answer wrong, you will die.

xxx: I should have written that I could avoid death when I met her:

You can answer by saying "You look average" or "You look normal". She will not know what to answer, which will also give an opportunity to escape.

Sometimes it is indicated that you can not answer her question at all, saying that she is busy, and then she will not persecute or insist.

YYY: Where is the option "Don’t miss and get acquainted"?

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №99617
 24.06.2014
I am currently running a program with questions about the PDT.

The question was "You eat at a speed of 40 km/h. In case of emergency braking, the brake length is approximately 8 meters. What is the length of the braking path at 50 km/h under equal other conditions?

and I immediately think: "not bad so"

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №99616
 24.06.2014
Well what guys went... first date: flowers, a walk, a city. I tell him between cases that the last relationship ended about six months ago.
The second date: the evening, a walk, a snack, I talk about intimate relationships and their undoubted physiological benefits. Third date: a picnic with friends, a slice, a watermelon...
The Seed! If you read this (and you read it), I want sex. Direct to now. The fucking romance.
July K.

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