bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №99146
 12.06.2014
How to read a textbook
If in the collective of authors there are the names of Kniheva and Neživa?

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №99145
 12.06.2014
It was probably a bad idea to paint smiling roses on the eggs in the refrigerator.
My husband came overnight and opened the refrigerator.
Long thought...

[ + 29 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №99144
 12.06.2014
Q: Do you still believe that in porn movies the main characters then get married?
WOW: At the end of the film, they may get married... and who has watched it?

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №99143
 12.06.2014
As the saying goes, in every happy family should be a comfort, joy and shrinkage))

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №99142
 12.06.2014
xxx: I asked about the shortcomings of work in Google
yyy: 32-inch monitor boasts views of the mountains
by Habr

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №99141
 12.06.2014
How can you be late to work? What about you at 10?
so accurate
I am not late until 7am, so I can sleep until 8am.! to
I sleep calmly until eight in the morning.
Do you not have time at 10?
Because after 8 I sleep restlessly.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №99140
 12.06.2014
X: TVs are not broken, the picture is blossoming, but not. Here is the producer of televisions - well, how to force these consumers to take their telephone to the laundry and buy a new one? How?? In these plagues, ideas like curved screens are born and compared with breasts. These ideas are generated by specially trained villains, sophisticated in understanding human psychology.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №99139
 12.06.2014
In some cases, dismissal is perceived not just as a dembel, but as a real yuri day :)

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №99138
 12.06.2014
Brochures of the store "MosColorTorg", which are distributed by African students, hint on slave trade.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №99137
 12.06.2014
Sorry, I could not stand:
It is....
He spent the night with his faithful, and she blows for the third day in a row for an unknown reason, small cages arranged - tired to itching in the brain. I get up in the morning, in general, cooking, and she turns around the circle and says:
Fried potatoes for breakfast are harmful foods, the first meal should not be heavy.
“Dear, but your first meal was delicious, sweet and nutritious.
...??? to
What else can be the brains?

We won’t talk the second day.
It is....

Bro, go fuck this stupid chicken without hinting on the chicken. I also had this in my youth, changed to normal - eighth year I am happy.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №99136
 12.06.2014
Infra: I don’t shave
Lone at all?
Infra: Yes
Infra: I don’t see any sense in that.
Sphere: Infra, girls more pleasant to do
Infra: I am not being mined
Infra: Just don’t say what’s because of this.

[ + 27 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №99135
 12.06.2014
The Crimean government reports that most of the humanitarian aid for Crimea has been stolen. It has never been so, and here again.

[ + 25 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №99134
 12.06.2014
The summer air. And your writing about diplomas.
The tomb, pl Ordzhonikidze, general staff of the school, 1995-th. Diplomas were written overnight, and when the city was shrinking, they went to the roof (there were 11 floors). A light village girl was there, and her father taught her to whisper in two fingers. We closed our ears, saving the membranes. A whist and we wait: someone whispered in response in the silence of the city, a whisper - and someone whispered on the car, a whisper - a scream: "Hello, hello to the night of the tomb."
A wonderful student.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №99133
 12.06.2014
From the discussion of the Fifth Civilization at LORA:

ptarh: There is nothing like this in the civi, and therefore it always feels like you are playing with a bunch of schizophrenic inadequates, not heads of state, which is very pleasant to play.

Tailgunner:...but it brings it closer to reality

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №99132
 12.06.2014
In the shelter of the architectural university, the tea pyramids are not cooked, but tea tetraedres.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №99131
 12.06.2014
NK: Mom can ask uncomfortable questions.
NK: It’s good that I learned to give them uncomfortable answers.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №99130
 12.06.2014
I cannot be silent:

> comrades with a cold compot for the child.
There is such a thing as hardening.
The child once drank a cold compot - well, let's say, his throat got sick.
I drank once, and again, and many more times © - and became resistant to cold drinks.

I don’t want to argue with the fool, but in light of the quarrel about concepts of upbringing of offspring it turned out that there are quite a lot of parents here, with the enthusiasm of testing the strength of their own children.
Thus, hardening is carried out only for children who have not been sick before at least one month of ARI and ARVI. First, rinse the throat with water at a temperature of 36-34 degrees. Reducing the temperature every 3-4 days by 1-1.5 degrees, ultimately bring it to 10-8 degrees.

The hunter sits in the tram and puts his gun on his knees, directing a dool on the neighbor.
Be careful, or you will shoot.
Well and what? I will charge again.

[ + 30 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №99129
 12.06.2014
I add :
Stop fighting about smoking ban! These laws are primarily aimed at reducing the number of new smokers (mostly young people), not against the old ones. Who smoked - he will smoke, and if the smoking person is not a joke, then he still observed most of these measures - not alone in the world lives and others also need to think about.

_______________________________________________________

In ancient times it was considered normal to offer human sacrifices to the gods. Now the thought of it itself will make you shrink. In the same way, in the future, people will be frightened by the thought that drug addiction once existed. With policy in the field of drug addiction, the future can be approached or removed - to decide for us (well, theoretically, we elected the deputies).
And then the next problem will be, for example, that someone else is throwing rubbish past the urn. There will be strict laws against this, a quarrel will begin again, but it will take a while and people will start to shrink from the thought that once there were people who specifically consciously made their city (think only - their own, it would be nice to have a saboteur on the territory of the enemy, but not) dirty. And then there will be a new problem - space pilots are lazy to get stuck during the warp jump.

It is normal. This is development. must be so. Let us make an effort to bring the future closer, or at least let us try not to hinder its advent.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №99128
 12.06.2014
to this:
"Chinese makes me crazy, you can’t do so much. In the evening I listened to the twist of two dogs, highlighted 5 tones, a dozen stable slogans...Nobody will convince me now that they whispered, and didn’t talk, and polite and friendly!

Oh yes, the unknown collector of reason! How I understand you! I have studied Chinese for almost 9 years. Sometimes, when I think of the English word "young" - "young", I hang for a minute in reflection, and whether in the correct tone my inner voice has pronounced it and what hieroglyph it is recorded.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №99127
 12.06.2014
I will explain:
They say that we cannot solve the question - what a woman wants. What does a man want? Then you know that the girls are not normal, "where are you the only one", friendsonite and bla-bla-bla... Here are others picking up that "smart, so you did not get married", "marriage is the main mistake" and bla-bla-bla... You just like to pine, and the presence/absence of a couple is just one way? Or is there a deeper reason?
------------
The deeper reason is as follows:

Socrates once told me to marry. If you have a good wife, you will be happy. If you are bad, you will become a philosopher. I don’t know what’s better"
(C) x/f "The same Munchausen"

Not everyone is ready to become a philosopher, while they intend to be happy. Which pill do you choose, Neo?

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