bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 58 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №51001
 29.07.2011
If you are able to take all the garbage and dirty dishes from the computer desk to the kitchen without the help of a bowl ONCE, then you are still a cleaner.

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №51000
 29.07.2011
XXX: Googling on the googles to cook
Go go go go go find

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №50999
 29.07.2011
Rinka: “Crazy” today was the most ridiculous incident
Rinka: [describes how she slept to work from the phone]
Dark Stranger: I thought it.
RINKA: What did you think?
Maybe you went home from the store, carrying a small bag of apples. Suddenly, his pen broke off and the apples broke down the road. You sat down to collect them, a beautiful representative car passed by. But after stopping next to you, a nice guy came out of her and started helping you collect apples. It was the last one left and you both pulled after him, and accidentally touched his hands, lifting up your eyes you met him with a glance. When you both got upset, he gave you an apple. Thank you very much, you hurried to get in. He cried out to you, and you engaged in a conversation. Then you invited him for tea. After drinking tea, he left. But a few hours later he stood by your door with flowers. You could not open the door because the door was closed. So I sat down before the master and MCS arrived and was late to work.
Dark Stranger: this is ridiculous))) and you are talking on the phone))

[ + 60 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №50998
 29.07.2011
The box with the first DOS's. Microsoft MS-DOS operating system.
If decoded: Microsoft Microsoft Microsoft Disk Operating System Operating System.
Tatiana was not there.

[ + 81 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №50997
 29.07.2011
I lie on my own sand, grumbling at the sunshine... And next to me these ‘huipojmi’, dressed in Indian clothes, with feathers on their necks, beat their drums and drums and swallow their ‘Hare Kṛṣṇa’ with swallows. And then the company (year after 60 all) baffled "Katyusha"! So cheerful and so rough that they were unwittingly forced to sing half the beach. Tinnitus on the skin. Our ones have won.

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №50996
 29.07.2011
In the bank:
Name your code word.
And your mother! I forgot the PIN code again.
is acceptable. Signed by.

[ + 55 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №50995
 29.07.2011
Blond: Question about the Chicken Raba. Why did grandfather and grandmother try to break the egg and not sell it, it was gold? They sold a bunch of eggs and they would have...
Or were they afraid that people would ask unnecessary questions, such as “where does the egg come from,” and if they learn that the chicken has snatched, will they steal it?
Or is there a morality, a type of value that you have and don’t want more? What about rational behavior? The thirst for survival?
Alex: You either change nick or not so deeply dig :)

[ + 123 - ] Comment quote №50994
 29.07.2011
Now I was sitting in the coffee shop for lunch, music is playing, the refrigerators are noisy, beauty is here! The music dims, the lights go out, the refrigerators are silent (electricity is cut off)
The bartender (a little girl with a crab in the navel) to the side of the kitchen, an unexpected bass for me:
The fucking! Whoever swallowed the tea, I will kill the naked!! to
I was drowned.

[ + 27 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №50993
 29.07.2011
Alex: Don't write me anything now, I've got my mom for the comp mike19: Okay, Loh
Mike19: Will you go out with us? and :)
mike19: Oh, thank you for the porn record, I’ve never met such a hard one before!! to
Mike19: Did the man ever tell you that he flew from you?? to
Mike19: But in general, we cooked her with you yesterday while she slept drunk.
Mike19: And in general, listen! Forget the money for heroin!! to

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №50992
 29.07.2011
yyy> I probably won't come to the day of Sisadmin
xxx> fucking sorry
yyy> I'll take the defacka to the restaurant, it hurts
xxx> and
xxx> well this is a respectable reason
xxx> not forgotten to take a certificate at the restaurant

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №50991
 29.07.2011
Vlad:Hohma, when he was sitting at the surgeon, such a grandmother runs, says to the surgeon, that her hand seems not to hurt, and so, but it is true, if the dog's hand is put on, then the hand will heal faster?
I mean 😉 😉 😉
Vlad: and the hirik with such a serious moustache says that it is not necessary to lie down, it is necessary to grind thoroughly all the hand.
I am almost salsy.

[ + 49 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №50990
 29.07.2011
From Twitter:
He barely pulled his head off his pillow.
Does your pillow have a head?! to

[ + 62 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №50989
 29.07.2011
In the morning I dreamed I was in a car. In the mirror, you can see everything collapsing behind me: buildings, the earth in the oak. Chaos in general...
I woke up. I decided to sleep.
launched a rocket. He fell into the neighboring neighborhood. Everything in fire.
No more sleep.

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №50988
 29.07.2011
Every time an administrator shaves his beard, one server dies somewhere in the world.

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №50987
 29.07.2011
From the assumption:
Object-oriented programming - came to the object, oriented and started programming.

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №50986
 29.07.2011
[13:47] <Infe[id]> [13:45:47] -NickServ- J3QQ4-H7H2V-2HCH4-M3HK8-6M8VW
[13:48] <Infe[id]> under this nick I once went to the channel #windows
[13:48] <Infe[id]> I was forgotten for some reason immediately
[13:48] <Infe[id]> =D

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №50985
 29.07.2011
I am in the store, sales consultant.
A 25-year-old girl arrives with a black screen on her laptop and asks if she’s with him... I press Alt+F4... The Sims 3 closes...

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №50984
 29.07.2011
This also helped me once:

People remember it! August is not behind the mountains, two-thirds of the summer is already fucking on the internet!

[ + 59 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №50983
 29.07.2011
My wish to fuck goats carefully given to my friends does not originate from personal experience, but only from the desire to expand the range of knowledge among acquaintances.
222: Let us write the book "Abby the Goat or How to expand the range of knowledge of your craft"?
111: "Surfing through the goat’s apple "
222: "Cerebral sex against ornithophilia – brain or goose?"
111: "Ornithophilic Tantra " - collection of works
222: "Ga-ga as a love call or Dear, spread your wings"
111: "Eggs are not the end of life" )
222: "Farted goose A guide to erotics".
111: The Hour Grey and White. Apartments
Chapter 22: The Grey Claw. For the valuers.
Chapter 11: The consolation. A story of one love.
222: My sweet and gentle goose!
222: and you can still make a network non-formal edition "Ebu-ga-ga!"
111: "Ebu-ga-ga" The history of one turn in the colloquium
222: Better "History of one poultry factory"
111: Scandals of investigative intrigue
and 222 )

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №50982
 29.07.2011
I was with a colleague on the street. He smoked and I just breathed. And here is this scene: We drive a man on a silver nissan maxima, and here a black cat is about to cross his way. The man begins to signal desperately, but it is clear that the cat is pofigo, and she crosses his way.
The man stops and begins to give in the back. He turns and leaves where he came from.
I suggested a colleague to catch this cat and let it go on the other side of the street to see how it turns out.

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