bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 30 - ]
 12.09.2017
Near the house opened a new sports complex - swimming pool, sauna, fitness, massage cabinet. First trial visit is free!



I think it would be very pleasant to go here, I think it would be comfortable. I leave the application.



Good morning, you are worried about the fitness club “Bla Bla Bla”. You have submitted a request for a free visit.

Yes, it is all right.

Have you been to our club?

You opened up for the third day.

Call your fi.

(I call it)

You are not in the base.

Let us think together. Maybe it’s because I’m not a visitor to your club.

Do you want to come to us?

- I really want to, so you have your application on the mail, and you call me on this application.

Well, now we will fill out a small questionnaire and I will be waiting for you for a guest visit.

(He asks me a few questions and I answer him.)

It is great, thanks! When would you be comfortable visiting us?

Give me that number.

I recorded, I’ll wait for you!

A free visit? Can money not be taken with you?

Yes, it is completely free!

Okay, until we meet.



I go to the club, I go to the reception.

I am on a trial visit.

What is the name of your manager?

In my heart, I don’t remember.

and accurate.

Is a printed invitation not enough?

No, remember the name.

(I go to the mail, look for the signature, look for the name).

If you are sick, another manager will take you.



I go to the manager, I sign a contract for a free trial visit.

Now go to the doctor for a certificate, the cost is 200 rubles.

On the phone, the girl told me nothing about the certificate.

Oh yeah right? It should have been.

I have talks, will you listen?

No, but we do not leave without a certificate.

About swimming pool, fitness, fitness club, subscription, long-range

Fuck you in shit. I go to the doctor, in 15 seconds my wrists and ankles are examined, a seal is placed. I go to the dressing room and see a miracle - closets without locks, without code, without nichu. Only the cushions under the castle are made.



Huge, his mother, the wardrobe, and there is no lock on any closet. I go to reception.

How do I close the closet?

You should have brought the castle with you.

What to fuck? What a castle? And the swimming pool and two trainers I did not have to bring with me under the mouse?

The manager should have warned you.

About swimming pool, fitness, fitness club, subscription, long-range

No warning, the conversation is recorded. I’ll deal with you after I swim, and now what to do with the closet?

The rental fee is 200 rubles for 1 day.

About swimming pool, fitness, fitness club, subscription, long-range

Give me your fucking lock.



The pool relaxed a little, the anger let go. I dress up, collect things, go out to the reception.



- I want to leave a complaint on your manager, who swung his tongue into his ass and did not talk about the necessary spending of money.

We have just opened, we have no complaint book yet.



It was fighting. Fuck you, the pool for 400 rubles although ugly in the shower, but not bad. I’ll come back to you again, I’ll vote for Ruby.



A couple of days. The call:

This is the Bla-Bla. Were you on a guest visit?

Aaa, it is you. Yes, and I will not come to you again.

And what happened?

Why didn’t you tell me that the lock of the closet should be taken with you? Why didn’t you say you needed a certificate? Why do I find out about spending money on a free visit when I come to you, not in advance?

I told you!

I have conversations written. I can let you listen to the record, so that 400 rubles are deducted from your salary and returned to me.

Oh, that is all! Goodbye, I’m sorry you didn’t like it.



It is angry! Blaat, say you about those 400 rubles in advance - no problem at all! And as long as you keep us fools and put us in front of the fact, you will have empty rooms and unhappy customers, and endless complaints.
Eng

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna