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[ + 33 - ]
 01.04.2019
Listen to! He said a tired voice in the phone. Are you tired?
I am tired! The director answered honestly. Very tired. You are the fourteenth person I am calling.
And why?
“I said it,” the director replied tired. As I understand, you don’t have the opportunity, so let’s just finish the conversation.
“An unusual move for a telephone hooligan,” a voice smiled in the telephone. Are you seriously talking?
“You are the first to ask,” said the director. Others are becoming bullied or threatened. Sometimes they laugh, joke and hang the phone.
Listen, how are you there?
- Ryzhikov Alexander Mikhailovich, - readily repeated the director. I was introduced at the beginning of the conversation.
Oh Alexander Mikhailovich! The voice in the phone was fun. Can you prove that you’re not joking? Now let’s talk seriously.
The director breathed and thought.
“There is such a possibility,” Alexander Mikhailovich replied. Find the director's phone in the director's director's director's director's director's director's director's director's director's director's director's director's director's director's phone and call them there. If I say no, you might think of me as a joke.
The good ones!
There were short tubes in the phone. Ryzhikov murmured, laid the tube on the lever, breathed again and looked out of the window. On the dim from time and dirt of the glass flowed rare drops of a little rain.
The head, the director blasted. “I’ll retire, send everyone out, take a cage and go to the forest. I will clean...
What exactly clean mushrooms he was going to pick up for the Redheads, he did not have time to say. The phone on the table ringed the most intermittent thrill that Ryzhikov had heard in twenty years. Personal calls to his office rarely brought good news.
- Yes, - replied Alexander Mikhailovich, removing the telephone. I listen to you carefully.
It is still you! A familiar voice answered.
“Yes,” the director briefly confirmed. And so much?
Okay, I was convinced, the voice in the telephone became serious. Why such an unusual way? There are advertisements, newspapers. The internet finally!
- I was giving an announcement, - explained the redheads. I gave it on your internet. So I understand you very well. No one takes them seriously. At best, they call and joke. I am so tired of these jokes. Do I have nothing more to do?
Why do you personally call? He continued to disturb the interlocutor.
The secretary went to the decree, the director replied. The accountant receives a report. Employees have something to do besides calling. Should I put a cleaner on my phone? Maybe there will be more questions? Do you need the size of my shoes? The answer is forty-four.
Why two individuals at once?
“They do not live in captivity in any other way,” Alexander Mikhailovich said. They miss, they get angry, and then they chew. In short, like the people. For example, are you sitting for a long time in an empty locked room with a large window that looks out to the empty? They need space. I don’t have room for them now. The director cried in my heart. Then he explained in a normal voice:
They cannot build! How to freeze in winter?
They were silent in the telephone. The director waited silently, looking at his reflection in the dirty mirror. A man in a brown costume. The green glasses in the plastic envelope with thick glasses could not hide the fatigue in the grey eyes. Unable to withstand, Ryzhikov first looked strictly at his mirror double, and then unexpectedly flashed and showed his tongue. Even a smile appeared in the reflection.
And the city? Finally the voice said.
- The city has no money for it, - cut off the Rizikov, grumbling. I told you to run out yourself. Here I get out as much as I can. As you can see, a little.
How much time do we have? The businessman’s tone is known to the interlocutor.
A month, the director replied. The maximum. He looked at the floor, where in the flowered linoleum was a huge hole, revealing the predatory slope of the polished parquet. Can you really help? Or decided to joke too? Do you have a place to place them? Is there anything to transport? Is there finally something to feed?
- I have, of course, no. - the voice began.
Then say goodbye! Rosie breathed deeply. I have too little time for worldly talk.
He stretched his second hand to the phone to give a response.
I have not finished! The interlocutor shouted. The director’s finger was stuck within a millimeter of the lever. Personally I do not. But there are people...
“There are always people who have everything,” Alexander Mikhailovich replied with a cold voice. I have no money for their services. And no one will give them.
“It’s not about money,” the interlocutor said. Do you have someone who can take care of these animals while I have them? I can buy them a ton of carrots, but I have no idea how to feed them. How much warm water to wash? Where to put the nausea? Can it be taken to the field?
- You can, - smiled the director, drawing a circle on a scattered dusty table with a finger over a cracked lacquer. In the Czech Republic, one of my colleagues sells them for $3 per kilogram. This is right in the plastic bottles packing and selling.
Are they buying? I was surprised by the voice in the phone.
There are no tourists! I praised the roses. It doesn’t smell at all if the animal is healthy. In India, it is made of paper. Also a souvenir. Growth is coming!
Why are you not trading?
I can’t do that, the director said. If there is another source of income, except tickets and photos, they will be eaten in a moment. And my accountant will hang from this burden. Although, no, I’d rather just be fired, if I’d at least talk about it.
This is Alexander Mikhailovich. The voice of the interlocutor changed sharply, became harder. The director instinctively stressed. - Within an hour a man from me will approach you. He will listen to you carefully. This week we will prepare a volley, so report, or better - write down all the requirements for the conditions of the individual.
Two individuals! The director corrected.
And yes two! The interlocutor agreed. Temperature, humidity and the like. After that, you personally, I repeat, you personally inspect the volley. Before that, you will notify us of the requirements for the transport and loading of animals so that we can prepare. Your man must accompany individuals all the time. Travelling and accommodation will be provided by the employee. For long all this?
“I don’t know,” said Alexander Mikhailovich. - When they will build a normal winter wolverine in the zoo. Tell me, why do you need all this personally? I just warn you not to sing about love for animals. I have worked with animals for two decades. With people, even more. So why? Just honestly!
and honestly! The interlocutor promised. As a child, I dreamed of buying an elephant.
Source: https://www.anekdot.ru/release/story/day/2019-03-31/#1006898
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