bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №107616
 01.01.2015
< twins> the weather is offgenic. by 27
Twins> family member tells how she travelled in Dubai
< twin> back, I say, welcome to Dubai

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №107615
 01.01.2015
1 January. Wife to husband:
We need to take the rubbish out, and Lenny...
The husband:
Who is the eagle?! to

[ + 22 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №107614
 01.01.2015
Discussion of the video recording of the crash of the land cruiser, which flew under the sign of "go down the road", and the gazelle:

Incognito: I wonder what he thought when he tried to jump through.

Direxe: About the Court in the case of Yves Roche. Here he goes and thinks: well, Yves Roche says he has no pretensions to anyone, Navalny says he has nothing to do, the prosecutor's office has no direct evidence, and the court nevertheless makes a conditional, but sentence. Second sentence in a year. What is the shit of the grey goat. And there’s that dumb gazelle from where to get.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №107613
 01.01.2015
Today we were congratulated by the Deputy Doctor on behalf of the Administration.
I quote :
Dear colleagues, on behalf of the administration, I congratulate you all on the coming New Year. I wish you good health and all the good. Health is the most important. There will be health, we will earn for life. Children are sick, they are sick and, God give them, they will be sick!

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №107612
 01.01.2015
Do not do good to your neighbor, for he will rejoice in you and rejoice in you.
YYY: What is it?
xxx: in the county found an announcement by chance - a poor family will be grateful to donate an inexpensive computer with an office. And I just understood the mess, I collected 2.5 systems. I called, took the address - in the area of the stop. I come, I sit with a compost at the stop like a bomb. And O miracle, this miracle comes in... at the expense of Octavia the Negro...
Life is pain?
Noah, as it came, so it went. I would have such insufficiency.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №107611
 01.01.2015
Bones: He came out of the balcony, his elbow hit the tree, fell on a cat sleeping in a chair. 1 to 1, CHO!

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №107610
 01.01.2015
The new year is fasting for us.
Everything will happen soon.
What will dream
A flying skateboard.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №107609
 01.01.2015
Review of the game laptop:
A gaming laptop is like a front-wheel drive SUV, or a mansion with courtyard amenities.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №107608
 01.01.2015
and sad:

Someone, give me back my childhood, Santa and a fun mood.

Your childhood has gone nowhere. You understand, when you are an adult, you create your own holiday, mood, and you are Santa Claus yourself.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №107607
 01.01.2015
We were all forgotten again. The one whose name cannot be pronounced out loud, has been late with his speech for an hour! The holiday of Kamchatka! I am

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №107606
 01.01.2015
A little morning poetry.
Department of Construction from its office:
"And from our window the dawn of light is visible!!and "
Economists from their office:
"And from our window Lenin Square is visible!!! to
My colleague in the throat.
"And from our window you can see the NEVEWEN KRAN!"

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №107605
 01.01.2015
Manager: Well, because it is lunch, 30th and you have to drink champagne and eat a mandarine...And you don’t need the calendar quarters for the New Year?
--------
We have a 31st worker in the country, if anything.
They have eaten a mandarine almost since November, and then they say that the small business in this country does not shine anything, even if it is half-broken.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №107604
 01.01.2015
XXX: Is it a celebration?
Yyy: want to sleep and not work, it is considered a holiday?
xxx: and
Eeee, then it feels

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №107603
 01.01.2015
Wife and Teisha - sunrise somewhere in the Alps...
Question: What number, until these two suckles, that we are not bored without them?
-----------
So what... are you, the sweaters, still married? Related to Divorce, are you afraid to catch a rock, saliva? Then struggle until death, and do not stumble.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №107602
 01.01.2015
In the cinema on the view of the Hobbit, the scene of Turin in the hall with the golden floor...
Wife:"They poured a beautiful sticker..."

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №107601
 01.01.2015
Someone, give me back my childhood, Santa and a fun mood.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №107600
 01.01.2015
Dolboye, explain me why, in your opinion, a holiday is to gather a crowd of people at 15 in a two-bedroom apartment, to wrinkle music on the whole coil in one room, and to gather yourself with a pit in another, to close the door to the room where music (because it prevents the shit) and run every 10 minutes to smoke in the entrance?

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №107599
 01.01.2015
Olivia, is this Olivia? as it does not, a little, at a time, for one and a half potatoes, for one small cucumbers, it still gets - TAZIK...

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №107598
 01.01.2015
As you meet the new year, you will spend it.
Sleepless and with a broken daily cycle.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №107597
 01.01.2015
to this:
There are people in the subway who go on a shering, and still barely move their legs.
It is necessary to make distinctions, similar to buses on the roads, for sharp passengers. And for violation to punish with a pinch under the ass.
_________________________________________________________
Also angry, but not in the subway, but in different centres in their city (we do not have the subway). I remembered - the first time when I came to Moscow for a 3-month internship, in the first days I was surprised that on the escalators in the subway people stand on the right, skipping on the left side of the more hasty (thought, well, to run on the escalator, what will decide some 1.5-2 minutes?) Weeks after 3 stays in Msk, found himself among the most running on the left side of the escalator.

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