bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 24 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58438
 10.01.2012
This story was told to me by my brother.

Introduction to the course:
At the moment, my brother is studying in one of the institutions of our vast homeland.
Probably everybody knows the boratata hohma when the prepute calls at 2 o'clock at night:
Do you sleep?
I slept with a sleepy voice.
We are teaching shit!

A similar story happened with my brother’s father. And here he comes to a stream lecture. Men are 120-150. and says
- Guys, you understand, I gave you my cell phone so that you would call me and clarify the course, consultations, and not binge like little children.

Here comes the SMK:
Find me you shit.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №58437
 10.01.2012
I answered:

My sister is studying as a designer. was as-
He is at home and his sister is on the table.
All kinds of stuff for drawing and drawing.
I get into an incomprehensible joke and
I ask :
What is it? A flexible cure.
For what is it?
(The answer hanged the system...)
To paint the curved lines.

The system hanged on him... And you try to draw a sinusoid, cosinoid, etc. exactly. At least...

[ + 27 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58436
 10.01.2012
What if I describe myself in the kindergarten?
You will die of shame, three year old exile!

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №58435
 10.01.2012
Chereshnya: Fuck, this is how now from the vacation to the working style, if I planned to lie down between 22-23 o'clock, and it turns out, what at this time wildly want to eat?? to

[ + 40 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58434
 10.01.2012
Google Translate translated the phrase:
Chupame El Choto
Choco and Chupame

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №58433
 10.01.2012
XHHH: On the street metet. I am afraid not to get to my area. I need to find a place to sleep.
YYY: What do you think?
HH: Well, I would have asked for you. But you have a dad. I was not prepared for the meeting with Pasha and I was frightened by the cowardly parachutes. Cole lives in the same area as me is not an option. A girlfriend is a good option. But she doesn’t have a scarf to dig up in the morning. The former remains.
Another plus to the former. You can wear it in any shirt.)

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №58432
 10.01.2012
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Yyy: No, weakness is filling our ranks!

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №58431
 10.01.2012
Night is not the best time to read Po.
Yyy: Night is the best time to write software. and :)

[ + 32 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58430
 10.01.2012
Even the description of My Little Pony is worth throwing it here.
The new animated series from Hazbro about the pony was planned as a children's series and it could only have two series, but due to the crazy popularity among adult men, it decided to release it further. Magic, pony, action, friendship, worship, magical kingdom and dragons - here you will find it all.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №58429
 10.01.2012
A girl calls and asks in a serious tone:
Do you have a children’s home near your home?
Oh yes, and what?
I have to put my daughter there, and we are giving birth to a new child. Who will not be playing a dog at 6 years of age and writing at the corner!!!! to
Softly speaking, ohhhh...

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №58428
 10.01.2012
White_Water (00:18:00 10/01/2012)
How did my cat spend the night with strangers?

Deadvoron (00:21:10 10/01/2012)
is normal. I was sleeping, eaten, laughing. :)

White_Water (00:21:21 10/01/2012)
Blessed means...

White_Water (00:21:43 10/01/2012)
A moral prostitute :D

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №58427
 10.01.2012
Slon: I was in a group with fruitorians (
Elephant: I was written there: “You are what you eat” in the development of the thought of how with meat the fear experienced by animals is transmitted to man.
Slon: And I asked why none of them said, “I have the will in me, as in papaya?”

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №58426
 10.01.2012
jifa (1:28:26) and I bite
jifa (1:32:44) and the breasts myrly
jifa (1:33:29) and I just touched the cat

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №58425
 10.01.2012
BaDSiN: In general, if everything goes well with this girl, you won’t see me here in the next month.)
Kisselman: Treat the Bush?

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №58424
 10.01.2012
XXX: How little I have photos (
YYY: Why so much?
How will I get older and how will I, without photographs, prove to my grandchildren that I was beautiful when I was young? I won’t believe it =(
Yyy: They won’t believe you with the pictures =D

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №58423
 10.01.2012
xxx:It all happens, it was like this moment: the girls decided to walk... well, they are all so pathosny... and something we talked to him about cars and knocked them down, said they don't know anything... and one of them answered me: yes, you were a fool in general, only iron and you know, but you can't say a word about fashion and you can't say a word about cosmetics, for example, don't say, a donkey.
I was cursed...
She didn’t know I was working in Oriflame.
Yyy: Don’t go any further, I believe ?
xxx:that this is a shit.... I still got a good friend, after my monologue adds, I quote:
"I can’t understand, you think we guys are idiots at all? Or I don’t know how terrible it is when you smell yourself with a tonal and then you are afraid to scratch your cheek, or when you paint your nails and open the door with two palms?and "
Here I go even.
YYY: Boy, I have two questions to your friend – where do you go?and XD

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №58422
 10.01.2012
XXX: What are you sharing?
I'm preparing for Devil 3
Q: Do you close your tails in the universe or work in the face sweat?
Mmm... no. I went through the first devil...and I got fired from work
Behold, now I see, my son, you are ready to fight evil!

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №58421
 10.01.2012
I put the test up on the battery. It came out of the pot and grabbed a flower. Mom's comment: Even the pasta is looking for friends, and you are baking all the cakes.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №58420
 10.01.2012
"I have a Moldovan acquaintance, and he means has acquaintances
The Mentee. Well, and how went the fashion in the car music discs (CDROM)
on a rope to drive, so that the mints are not caught by radar
Because of the violation of speed, he decided to check the case. Asked his
familiar ments to stand with the radar in front of the new bridge (this is
He goes away from the city and pulls out of his poor.
"coins" all 100 km per hour. He flows to the menta, and they are already his stick.
Mushut - said useless, all mulls caught you, on the radar showed.
The Moldavian does not pay attention to them, making a fighting turn almost
It does not decrease speed and moves to the starting point. It does not take two minutes,
He is again in the minds. The hookers began to hear something wrong.
Both of them are already waving their sticks and shouting the mother’s words loudly, but all of them are
useless picture is repeated - the Moldavian again wildly twisted
He goes to where he came from and goes to the police for the third time.
Mint is scary fat: included a flashing, in the matyughalnik orth, already sticks
over his head that he should stop - because the devil knows him
What happened to him, suddenly the man's roof went off or something else.
The Moldavian finally reacted, stopped, excited, his eyes burned,
opened the window and said: "Men, and maybe even with Shufutsky’s disc
Let’s try..."

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №58419
 10.01.2012
Employer Response on Freelance:
Not an adequate person, promised to write a program in a few days, a week later he sent me a textbook with the words write yourself.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna