How I caught cancers.
I didn’t know about cancer before, I didn’t know about it. Someone bought some cancer. He prepared and taught them to eat well. I very liked.
A friend of mine invited me to relax in nature. Cancer eating and fishing. The catching of cancers at the time I was confusingly imagined with some net with brick. Fig with him: took tents, loaded everything necessary in the cars and on the way. We arrived at a hot channel coming from the GRES. Slavka is our acquaintance, gets aqualange. “Well, Nihrenasse, cool!” I thought. he wears an aqualance, explains and shows everything in detail, wears the usual mattress household gloves, takes a net bag with a thin throat and, in a hurry, smoothly plunges into the canal. We didn’t catch the time, but it wasn’t his 10 minutes. Only small bubbles appeared in some places. Through them we tracked his movement and the place where he had to help him get to the shore. Here is the waterfall. We help him out, in his hands he has a grid with, almost, a cage of cancers. We remove all the ammunition from him, and Glory speaks to me:
Now you give it.
V is meaning. and I?
- Yes, not sinking, everything is regulated, the air is still full, which I will not understand.
I swim well. Lasta, the mask with the tube I have long known, I can hold underwater for a long time, but the aqualang, so close, saw for the first time. Here I note that my girls, and all the guests, look at me as a submarine hero, who is now planning a feat. It is impossible to turn around at this moment, so trying to look confident and courageous, I give the team:
Go to! Dress up!
There is a small retreat. I didn’t look like a pretty catch, but I was quite sporty. Slavka knew that I loved all kinds of experiments, adventures and welcomed something new and unusual. For the rest of the company, it was absolutely blatant: everyone was waiting for us to finally break up the camp and open a canister with alcohol. There were no particular candidates.
While I was hanging all this underwater equipment, in my head for some reason flashed children's verses and phrases: "I am not a coward, but I am afraid", "Why did I get up at the wall? My knees tremble, and so on. When it was done, I asked:
How do these, like these, cancers catch that there?
- It's simple: on the walls of the channel you look for a hole, hang your hand there. When you feel that your finger is stuck, you catch it and smoothly, or the leg will break off, you pull it out and into its bag. Looking for another Norman.
Is the hand far away?
Well, there is an elbow, even more.
The Nihyace! I thought they should go into the bag themselves. I’m not going to describe the process of diving, but when I got underwater, I was pleasantly surprised. Breathing was noticeably harder, but in a few breaths I got used to it. The heavy aqualong did not push me to the bottom, but balanced my position under the water. I felt like I was in space. So why am I here? Another bag in hand. Oh the cancer! I went to search for Nora. It turns out, you don’t have to look for them – they are there! I swim to the first, a few seconds of moral preparation. It’s still breathy, but, overcoming fear, I slowly start to squeeze my hand into the hole. Oh the fucking! It is scary, fuck it! Isn’t it a monster, but a monster? My hand is almost in the neck. Suddenly I feel something trying to get stuck in the gloves. It is all, shit. In my head, fragments from horror films, as I pull out of the cave a bitten, bloody, with broken edges hand, with spinning white bones. I try to remember the prayer. Suddenly, something specifically grabs my finger in the gloves. In front of your eyes, images of uselessly lived life begin to flow, and somewhere behind, bubbles begin to actively emerge, but there is no aqualange. Probably the brain turned off and handed all the powers to the ass. Pulled with bubbles, his ass quickly and clearly gave the order: "Now quickly catch him and carefully pull out." Immaculately I execute the order and in my hands, already before the mask, there is a very significant cancer. I put it in the bag and here the brain connects again. I almost stumbled into the aqualong: “Hurra! I did it! It was not scary at all!” The second cancer, though with tension, I pulled out more confidently. It went like seeds. Having caught approximately 30 pieces, I sailed, pulled out the wreck and, boasting, spoke:
Look how much I have caught! Are you weak?
Demonstratively pulling out a bag-net from the water. On the shore almost everyone starts to rust, and the Slavka asked:
Didn’t you hold your bag with your hand?
I look at the bag, and there is a lonely cock sitting! How is it??? There was even more laughter for my excuses. Someone, on the contrary, reassured and encouraged me. Through a general whisper, Glory explained to me that the crabs are only on land so slow and unshakable, and in the water they can give the fish forums, in any hole they crawl. They went through the bag and fucked up. I was slightly stunned, but the resentment and annoyance made me, wiping off the mask, sink again. The bag, or rather her throat, I squeezed under the water now with all the anger. Cancers were pulled out of the bunkers mercilessly, like fascists. But the forces give their way, and with the head I always friends (periodically watched the manometer). When I was helped to get out to the shore, there were 18 good crabs in the bag, and it was left in the air balloons for 5 minutes. To the question, type, how is it? He replied confidently:
A shit at all. I immediately caught a lot of them, just lounged with a small bag. It was very interesting, not even scary at all.
At a bit shaken by the adrenaline, no one paid attention to his hands.
Already elsewhere, on the lake, a camp was destroyed. I’ve never eaten so many cancers in my life. The shrimp taste rests. There were also crabs in the lake, but I did not catch them there, they caught them in other, simpler ways, but there was no shortage of crabs, even a lot was brought home, and the fish were caught well.
My wife and I went to that channel several times. Don't believe it, but I was only diving in masks and slugs, and I threw the caught crabs on the shore, where my wife picked them up. So they picked up a half-size. I still remember that fishing.
by PS. The story is true to the slightest, and now I know exactly where the cancers winter.