I sit somewhere at work, and our tables are shifted in rows, we sit next to each other.

The system is on the right of the monitor, that is, the picture is as follows: monitor, system, monitor, system...

My computer hangs, I confuse the systems and tick the reset on the one on the left, i.e. in the neighborhood. Compu popped, I am surprised and ticked a few more times.

Then I look at the neighbor on the left, and he looks at me.

Sorry we can’t be together.
WOW : Why?
NHL: 42
I’m 26 and I think the difference in age ;)
The MDA...

My inheritance is great! My grandmother has three survivors!! I will be the same!!! to
Hygiyya... Yes, she must be handed over by the female satan with the pentagram of the Hero of Bab labor! Three men from the light!! to
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! to

One evening my daughter (14 years old) comes to me and reports with a confident sad voice.
I seem to be a mother.
Looking at my half-blind state stretches me a cell phone, on which hangs the SMS spam "Mommy, urgently translate to such a number so many rubles, in the evening I will tell you".

Comment to the news "School teachers of South Dakota were allowed to arm themselves"

Hotey: Now in the Dakota children will be moving through the corridors, and shooting physruck - a worker to gather crowds of fans.

After 30 seconds, the telephone begins to work and a waitress appears in the door, with a victorious look twisting the grinding.
I sit here and think she did there.

It blurred the IR lighting on the security camera, which blurred so that it reflected up to the neighboring room and knocked the controller.

Philopath: Do you really think you can find a narrowing in McDake?
Pathophile: rather extended :)

xxx: Well, what about me, how foolish will I be driving to Moscow, when I can drive directly from my home to the university by electric car?
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
What is "Little"?
Yyy: Are you a little fool?

I have very chaotic neighbors. Someone put an old closet on the staircase. The next day, the inscription appeared on the closet: "Confident. There is no narcissism"

from the forum space =))
"I would return my former luxury. The length is now 15 cm below the shoulder. There was always a kidney minimum, sometimes a lower ninety. Thick and strong, even hanging on your hair... Now the thoughts of suicide on your own grip are not relevant at all. The"

Yesterday before bed, the daughter (4 years old) says: "Mommy, let's sing a song about cute pony? " We pull with her a song from the initial titles to the cartoon. We sing the last line, I silence, and the child looks at me with a clear condemnation and continues: "Friendship is a miracle! Author of the idea Laura Faust, producer - Sarah Von". And so insultingly he adds to me: "Why did you not sing until the end?"

From the review of VAZ 2107:

... A! The ignition key is very stupid, inserted to the left. The windows sweat in the winter. It does not blow on them. ...

Commentary :

The key is located on the left to start quickly, with the left hand to start and the right hand to switch the transmission. It is like a porch."

XXX: How the pop hired a worker
To you, girl, my life will be easy, not as much to work as to rest!
You will wake up in the morning, as you would, to the light. You will wash the cattle, clean the courtyard, feed the cows, let them go, put them in the straw and rest.
Breakfast you shake up, samovar you warm up, meat us with mommy breakfast and sleep-rest!
In the field you will work, in the garden you will field, in the winter you will go to the woods, you will go to the seed and sleep and rest!
You will cook lunch, you will baked cakes – my mom and I will sit down for lunch, and you will sleep.
After lunch, wash your dishes, clean your bed and rest!
When the time is appropriate, you go into the forest for berries, for mushrooms, but the mother is sent to the city, so you run away. Go to the city with your hand, and there will be no eight warts, and then rest.
And you, girl, are sleeping day-to-day, what time will you sleep at night?
At night, you will struggle, squeeze, raise, sew and rest again!
Well, in the morning, you wash your clothes, which needs to be washed, cut off to sew and sleep-rest!
Girl, it is not for nothing. I will pay money. Every year for rubles. Think of yourself. A hundred years is a hundred rubles. You will become rich!

YYY: ordinary job ads for an enicacheer

RT @ryba_xek: Some guards are shocking. I go to car service. The KPP. I am in service. The guard: “What do you want to repair the car?”
...??? to
RT @ryba_xek: No, that’s not all! Another security guard at the same station at the exit asked, I quote, “Do you think this car is worth repairing?”

CHC: When you say “Apple iron quality” you mean the metal body, right?

In the social network:
xxx: I will donate any big book, pages of 500-600, preferably enlarged format, well or at least simple. Any content, even a reference book. Average or good, year of release does not matter.
Q: What about the color? This is the most important thing in the book!

I went to the pool. I saw people in bathing hats with a large inscription "HEAD". I wondered what was written on the rest of the swimsuit?! to

From the hubr, talk about drug legalization

MarkPnk: I am, for instance, right now under the pit, at the peak of an absolutely wild parish! Yes, I’m crazy and crazy. Absolutely free and legal. Without chemistry. This drug is called love. And I promote him.

Better to be quiet. Banned and landed.

I have twins I know (they are 3 years old), one asks "Why", and the other answers "Because".

(A girl in a bar)
D: What are you doing?
Q: I am a super secret agent from the KGB!
Now we know your secret!
Q: Nothing bad I have a super device to wipe out memory like people in black (get the light bulb, do the cirk, the light bulb does not burn)
D: :)))
P: Nothing (I will wipe your memory old)
D is?? to
Q: I will quietly pour vodka in your martini.