bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №56359
 12.11.2011
Where "down" can the planet fall???? to

In the ocean where a turtle floats, on which elephants stand and hold the Earth. What stupid questions?

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №56358
 12.11.2011
I wrote a letter to a friend of mine.) wrote:
I am already in bed...
What are you wearing now?
D is clothes!
I- mmm how it starts "clothes"))) trainers say more )
Damn how do you know! ?

[ + 55 - ] Comment quote №56357
 12.11.2011
Teacher of Geography:
“Russia should be able to defend its territories, because some states have long legs.
Neighbors at the party:
and narrow eyes.

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №56356
 12.11.2011
The wife after the ultrasound of the 21st week walks through the apartment, smoothes the stomach and says: "Hey, and I have a member! " Blind, although I know that the member is not the wife, but the future son, but still somehow strenuous...

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №56355
 12.11.2011
XXX: Obama congratulated Russia on joining the WTO

YYY: Black humor

[ + 84 - ] Comment quote №56354
 12.11.2011
I got into the DDR today. I crashed the BMW X5.
Ask what? The tram...
Ask how? I pushed the tram.

It is true :) The tramway stuck at the intersection (on the suspension where it stopped there is no electricity) the car driver asked to push. As long as we pushed (just a meter!) We managed to overtake and cut BMW. In which we ride and ride.

I can imagine the faces of the Gaiishnikovs and the protocols.

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №56353
 12.11.2011
If you ever find it difficult to persuade your wife to have sex, in vain you think that it is almost impossible for other men to do so.

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №56352
 12.11.2011
Russia’s 14-ton spacecraft is targeting the United States.
The Phobos Ground, according to preliminary estimates, will fall to Earth on December 3.

Commentary: Well with God.

[ + 73 - ] Comment quote №56351
 12.11.2011
The girl’s statement:
Men like bluetoth, but close - the connection is good. Kгдa far away - the heart begins to spark new devices, and the Woman as wi-fi, sees everyone, but connects to the strongest )))

Answer of the guy:
Yin...
Let’s start with the fact that the coverage radius is not very different.
Just as Bluetooth is looking for new devices, Wi-Fi is looking for new networks, and with greater speed and less resolution ;)
In addition, when connecting a new device, Bluetooth will always ask you whether you want it or not, even if the new device knows your password.
while wi-fi is easily hacked, and when you see a password generally unconditionally "moves your legs")))

[ + 50 - ] [11 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №56350
 12.11.2011
Mysteryx: Mda... in my childhood the “Massaraksh!” was a sign of good taste in literature. Nowadays it is bad in the cinema.

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №56349
 12.11.2011
Dad switched the channels to see what was going on:
Channel 1: (with a harsh voice) the reality is cruel...
Channel 2: (rejoicing)... and breakfast should correspond to this!

and brother from the kitchen with "Rollton" so sad comes out)

[ + 58 - ] Comment quote №56348
 12.11.2011
Tracker from the discussion Skylim:
-"Tell me about this issue!) In my hero was shot with a arrow straight into the mouth))) and she is still torching there, a couple of missions have passed after that, it is still torching!!))) play then you can all the norms, but the chat stresses anyway)) you can who knows what you can do)"

[ + 67 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №56347
 12.11.2011
HarboS: I sit chewing something on a cigarette.
HarboS: The boss (N) comes in and says
Do you know how workers were chosen before?? to
HarboS is no.! to
The men sat at the table and watched who was eating.
HarboS: So what?
Whoever has eaten well, has worked well!! to
HarboS: Why all this conversation?? to
N: You would definitely fuck them all.

[ + 65 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №56346
 12.11.2011
Incoming SMS: -Mom, urgently put 1300 rubles on my account, don't call, then I'll explain everything.
SMS: Go on, we found the bug.
Incoming SMS: -The balance of your personal account is equal to -1230 rubles.
:' and (

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №56345
 12.11.2011
About the harm of alcohol:

Fuck you fuck me fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you
Yesterday I drank...drank a lot.
HYGY: He came home, could not enter the innet, which he did and went in.
HYGY: Scuco when from the tra I saw that I had gentoo instead of windy
I stopped drinking.

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №56344
 12.11.2011
HHH
It’s nice to communicate with someone who doesn’t get to Wikipedia through every word you say, in order to find out what it means.

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №56343
 12.11.2011
On the Internet saw the news - link:"Doctors in shock: a person lives without a brain and works as a programmer"

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №56342
 12.11.2011
You’ve tried the grass, right? There is really nothing harmful to her? You just laugh. Yes is?
Oh, if... I’d fuck her again :(

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №56341
 12.11.2011
xxx: fucking, here is green tea, according to the idea, you can cook once... and what we sell - the 2nd time you cook - and this fucking gets...
YYY: Yes, and the first time also fucking.
YYY: The second time even a little better – you get used to it after the first time.

[ + 65 - ] Comment quote №56340
 12.11.2011
Lynch: how to extinguish a maika, if it has been filled with a homemade napalm and does not want to extinguish?
Lynch: A, all
Lynch: the source of the problem

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna