XXX: I gave him a WOW gift for his birthday
YYY: Is it a kilo of cocaine?

Do not chew, or you will get a spoon on your forehead.
The point?

Example of female manipulation
I was offended :(
Inna is no.

When I was a kid I sometimes bought mechanical toys, and I also had (and now have) an older brother, who was always interested in learning how these toys are arranged and therefore such toys did not live for more than a day. He understood how to disassemble them and could not collect them back. Exactly once it worked, he was able to make mechanical horses run again, but the rubber leather he could not put on them. I still have child psychological trauma in my mind in the form of iron skeletons of horses running around the room.
...and now in the kitchen with a foolish expression of the face, the husband sits and thinks that it is not so he connected that my laptop refuses to turn on after internal dust cleaning.

In 1986, an expedition of Soviet polarists reached the pole of inaccessibility in the conditions of the polar night.
And here is a very important question: why?

of answers
On the label to one Chinese sweater was written: "To wear longer you should not wear more often";

The Mad Donna:
I had to recently be in the company of housekeepers: a demonstration of cosmetics, stories about birth, etc. All in the best traditions. One of them begins to broadcast:
- Girls, in no case should you take a potato that has less than six eyelids - it is a genetically modified product and it causes infertility 100%. Even if you don’t have it!Your children will surely be infertile.If you eat such potatoes.
I take it and crack:
What a great way to save on contraception.
I was almost beaten.

This story happened to my friend who works in the forestry. In their village, the local priest decided to restore the church and, naturally, he had to coordinate the construction work himself.
One day he came to the pylorama to check the load of wood material.
The men from the boat put on the body of pine pebbles, and they got one very bitten, so to speak. They suffer with him and so, and so, and the priest is already trying to help - and all in no way. And then the brigadier approaches and advises to close the board to load it from the end:
What are you paying? Put it on the top and push it up!
Give it to yourself, Judas. Followed by the pop replica.
...the loading ended with tears in the eyes and forced stops at the next attack of the whistle, looking at the red, like cancer, priest...

Cat Leopold: (thinkingly) Buried Gates - broke 256 battlefields.

Anyon: That is something else. A long time ago, when I just connected to the Internet and could not configure it myself, a young man came to us, who for a certain fee wrote the necessary IP addresses and DNS server. After doing his job, he went to Google to check his performance, wrote in the search line "for", then looked around 15-year-old me, and with an acid mine on his face wrote the word "weather".

Metredel (20:15:16 11/03/2011)
Half of the shoes were roaring.

*Made IN paradisE* (20:15:37 11/03/2011)
The admin went to the last battle!!!!! to

Metredel (20:16:36 11/03/2011)
and a young youth carried with an expicious wing

Gorynych: Lan, AFC, I’ll go small
Matryoshka: Evil, and whom did he create?
In the sense of creating?
Matryoshka: Did you say, I’ll go small, new pers?
Gorynych: )) ah )) the first Mikhail Alekseevich is called, the second Somochka )) for months 10 I have...

Share your recursion and it will come back to you many times.

My husband is late at work. I ran to the store, cooked dinner, cleaned up in the apartment, met on the threshold.
Mmm... very clean. Going to the kitchen... very delicious. (I pick up my dress) mm... naked. The ideal woman!

Maybe I don't know, in general, my grandmother's neighbors from China appeared (students rent an apartment) so one day one comes and says, "Give me an egg, please, I'll give you two." Well, my grandmother gave me an egg and said that I don’t need to give, and then the Chinese woman said that they have a tradition of giving everything in a double amount and then my grandmother said: “And if you give 50 dollars, then you believe 100?” Chinese honestly spoke of this logic)))

My faithful man, in search of "something to eat," opened the refrigerator and stumbled upon a bowl of freezing saucer.
Behold, there is blood, meat, fat melted.
He was astonished, he got there on the toothbrush a poster with the inscription "Short content of the "Elphic Song"", walks with this dish around the house and bark it.
Q: Who am I living with?! to

A colleague for something carefully grounded the oscillograph and used to look at the chain, where the general wire was under tension relative to the ground... The muscles when passing through the current reduce the seizure, he cramped his jaw for some reason, he pressed out (in fact, not knocked out) eight teeth.

A month later, I had a TB exam. He learned the whole Talmud by the mouth until the last fifth, but at the exam he was asked the only question:

Wouldn’t you go under stage anymore?

A friend was sitting playing in the headphones in the dojo, well there was an oral, etc.
To him fits a mommy, brings a piece of salt on a plate.
He turns around, Nifiga doesn’t understand... asks:
Why Why?
I asked what you were going to eat... and you were Salo, Suka, Salo!! to

A: Did they really get rid of anything?? to
Andrei, is it you?
A: Oh shit, not to you (
A: In the sense of apologies, Mom, I was wrong by the window.
A: Even if you’re already crazy...

X: "The State Duma Deputy at Bentley struck a police car" Everything was mixed up in the house... The police car, and there are police officers in them, people's elected in Bentley, and the people - in the street.
Y: Absurd
X: No, this is news