Yesterday I was in the pharmacy, in front of me the girl bought a large package of condoms, a lubricant and... a wide bandage.
Somebody’s going to be an...an until death.

You’re going to go with me on a date, right? standing on his knees
WOW: Oh what is it? You’ll be there and I’ll hold the candle? No – No...
Bro... I’m afraid of her.

A dispute with my wife.
I called your mother and congratulated her. I forgot about my mom’s doctor last time.
M: Dear, there is a fundamental reason why you remember such things, and I don’t remember. (I point out the gesture in the direction of primary sexual characteristics). Hence the main differences!
For a moment, I thought... Are you a fucker?

You need something or you don’t – you’ll know when you throw it away

“Tell me and I will forget. Show me and I will remember. Let me teach someone and it will be mine. Go aside and then maybe I’ll finally be able to do better than you taught me.”

The phrase seems to be familiar, but in this form you will not find it either in Franklin or in the ancient Chinese to whom it is attributed. It was abandoned to me a few years ago by a brilliant lawyer of the older generation. He was forever busy, forgot the exact quote, and he had to reinvent it himself. What’s called, Franklin turned aside. I think our lawyer did better.

This aphorism inspired him by a youthful memory. Despite the academic degree of a doctor of legal sciences and a lot of overly calculated regalias, he hardly remembered the lectures of the jurfak of forty years ago and the Talmud of the then textbooks. But his coursework, "On motivation of crimes", he had to do himself in real criminal cases - he remembered it to the details. Then, at the end of the sixties, a resolution came out that the accused should carefully find out the motives of the crime and take them into account when issuing a sentence. Before this ruling was easier - for how many years you rushed, so much and sit. Here a student and assigned a hot topic for the course. Investigating her, he found a bunch of amazing cases of those years, one of which I will tell.

The man was accused of having arranged a gun armor in the middle of the day in the Vladivostok supermarket "Golden Horn". First he shot the roof, then the people. There were no casualties, but the bullets were pulled out of the door. A mass murder attempt, a terrorist attack. The criminal has almost been convicted, and this is your decision. I had to ask him about the motives. He calmly replied that it was a foolish drunken joke - he only gathered to shoot into the ceiling. It seemed to him, do you see that from a long time of peace the people became quite cowardly. If anything happens, no one will protect the country, not even they can stand for themselves. Here he checked the people for seamlessness - a man stands in the center of the hall, does not throw on anyone, burns strictly into the ceiling, in the rest behaves normally. And nobody tried to stop him, everybody drove away.

“Why did you start shooting at people?” The investigator asked him.
“You understand, when I opened the ceiling shooting, women panicked and the healthiest cockroaches were the first to jump to the door! I was very sorry for the men, so I stumbled on them! From the soul!”

Psychiatrists found no defects in the man. Except for a strong sense of justice. And for this, we are not in a psychic, only in jail. The appeal went to the court: "A mitigating circumstance - was extremely outraged by the non-Soviet behavior of individual citizens"

And my grandmother still has a new Sony video magnet, which she promised to give me for my wedding.

How poor and naive you are, boys 15-25 years old. You believe that with your miserable life experience you know life. Having gathered in the back of life, and in the “Kiss123” you measure all women by their standards. Sitting on your mother’s neck and having worked for a couple of months as a promoter or consultant, you scream out loud that there are more than 10,000 in this country. Honestly not earning. Having listened to a couple of nurtured friends who in turn created worthless disadvantaged families, you believe that men are polygamous and must betray. You build your understanding of life from fragments of sites where the same losers share their experiences. You often don’t even suspect that there is another social layer where people do their favorite business and create happy families. But you don’t cross with them, they don’t drink beer at the entrances and don’t give “smart” advice on the forums, they don’t. And even if you meet them somewhere, then proceed through your teeth something jealous, not even realizing that you missed your chance to learn about another life again. Some of you will find out later, going through the robberies. Someone will never understand. Sadly...

From the hubr: It is difficult to take the news seriously about the virus writer from the village of Boru-Bash Ak-Sui district, who was detained by the operatives of the cyber threat group of the tenth department of the UVD of the Issyk-Kul region.

Wiping out my mouth, I answered:
Humiliates people who with a mouth foam persuade others to urgently stop watching TV, because you just get dumb from it. And then, proudly raising their heads, they go to watch their favorite series on the compass.

Your favourite series can be strikingly different from the really stinking soap operettes that are spinning on the TV. In addition, the series and the movie that you watch on the compilation, 100% will not be interrupted by the malicious advertisement. Yes, and the program for the party can be made independently, and watch exactly what you like, exactly when convenient.
It is about serialists. But you can also mention a variety of bu-ga-ga-shows with sorting humor, House-2, crazy programs about the treatment of cancer with a cabbage leaf, ANALYTIC transmission, bought-re-bought, and other TV games.

I clarify

From VK:
A day on Venus is longer than a year.
Commentary :
Isn’t the year made up of days?

Day is the time of rotation around its own axis. 243 Earth days for Venus.
Year is the time of the orbit around the sun. For Venus 225 Earth days.

It has long been known that female nipples are the male erogenous zone.
Yyy: I wanted to bet, but then compared my feelings with the expression of my husband’s face when he gets to them... And indeed, rather male :-)

I go with two of my dogs - puddles in exhibition condition, fresh washed, good - I admire myself. On the bench the grandmother of God. He smiles from far away. What beautiful dogs you have on your collar.

>> I work all day on Intersharma on Saturday. And that means all that I hate - spikes, makeup, layout (Intersharm, huli) and most importantly the babies who ask questions...<<

I don't understand - those who regularly suffer so much here - they will die of hunger without this work that breaks them so much, can't change the field of activity? Or are they masochists who just love to elevate the brain of others?
Irritating communication with people - go to work as a guard on a regime object. The question is, you are shooting. Just saw the shadow of a man - you shoot so that the question is not asked.
And there will be complete harmony, peace in the soul and prize.

The reverse side of love is hatred, but even it can be controlled.
Infernal: you can not only control diarrhea, everything else is possible!

How to react when the boss tells anecdotes about the anal fuck of the subordinates?

A friend chooses a refrigerator.
I want 2 meters.
Well, this 190, you will get 10 cm.
Nicole: That is a lot.
It’s a lot for the member, but not for the refrigerator.

To all who are tired of the flood, the heat in the summer and the fierce cold in the winter, who are tired of earthquakes, floods, tsunamis, etc. Come with us to the Kolska Peninsula. Comfortable temperature (+10+15) in summer and warm winter (-10-15). You have no p.

XXX:I drink tea and try to force myself to clean up in the apartment until the arrival of the ancestors)) They are from Friday on the country =)
YYY:o, it's difficult)) I usually start cleaning 20 minutes before arrival and immediately everything is cleaned))
Previously, when the elevator did not work in the house (and we live on the 8th floor) I was sitting behind the comp before the phone call) And then, while my parents went up the stairs, I was able to clean the dust and wipe the dust on the furniture) And sometimes even wash the dishes)

Sasha and Masha from a recent wife.
...representing Masha in the company of a friend.

Wanna: Hi
I am Masha.
Sasha: My girlfriend
Masha is Wife!
Sasha: O_O
All of them are pizzas 😉

What you can see in the subway.
I was riding the gray branch closer to the nighttime and saw this miracle: a twentieth-year-old boy dressed in black-and-white sweaters, not far from the rapers. There are huge headphones on the head. So far normal. But! Long hair, somewhere before the explanation. But that is not all. There was a crazy mixture of sounds from the headphones. It was as if the Slayer group had raped Dendy and it was all in an accelerated transformation. Then it was replaced by a classic, moving into a hellish trail, as if a man of twenty was doing repairs at the same time. During the trip, he read the book calmly.
The guy! Are you real at all?! to