bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №58648
 14.01.2012
Why does Oleg not answer my calls?? to
He: Man may not respond for a variety of reasons, ranging from the banally crazy - abducted by aliens; and the original crazy - as a result of a chemical effect, a genetically muted rat, trying to make a toast, accidentally grabbed a bottle of alcohol, trying to catch which, shattered and, as a result, broke the cable, which hardened. Oleg came home at this moment, the rat from fear fell on his arms. Oleg did not expect to see a genetically muted rat with toasts, spilled alcohol and a sparkling cable, resulting in shock and hospital.

[ + 17 - ] Comment quote №58647
 14.01.2012
"Google told developers how to decorate Android apps"

I couldn’t read it right from the first time.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №58646
 14.01.2012
And you can also add to the buttons funny and not funny the button "You are a fool?"

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №58645
 14.01.2012
YYY: I know what you think!
XXX: What about what?
YYY: I won’t tell you, I don’t want you to know what I think is right!
XXX: Oh you are a shit!
XXX: But I agree!
YYY: It works, epte!! to

[ + 36 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58644
 14.01.2012
She’s so blonde that I’t be surprised if she had a bow, she’d wear it now instead of a shirt.
Meow: You won’t believe it...

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №58643
 14.01.2012
SI++ has two fat pluses:
It is yes...

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №58642
 14.01.2012
The phrase indicator "disable antivirus and firewall" should be perceived by you as "remove your pants and get cancer"

[ + 62 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58641
 14.01.2012
Visited in Moscow. I understand that if anyone drops a nuclear bomb on Moscow, the Russians as a people will lose nothing.

[ + 72 - ] Comment quote №58640
 14.01.2012
What do you ask me, I’m a virgin! In theory, the car is fun.
He: No, for me it is not an option, not a toned one.
She: Yes, don't be afraid in 2 minutes the glass will sweat, nothing is visible.
She is fucking...

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №58639
 14.01.2012
What they do not sell in electric cars! Once I was driving in the morning after the New Year's holidays, so there was a man who poured salt from the canister to all those who wanted it.

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №58638
 14.01.2012
Do cats need to swallow? He runs like a horse, I can hear it. And his nails knock on the floor. And even the door breaks, if it is locked, din-din-din, loudly, and the pen pulls, just not mating the bass.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №58637
 14.01.2012
I have a recursion at the entrance *WALL*
WOW :?! to
Some fools are constantly opening the door to ventilate. At the entrance, the snail smells, and the other snails in it constantly suck, because. The door opened.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №58636
 14.01.2012
xxx: I found a bug in a game with my cat!
See also mm?
When he bites, I grab him for the skin and he hangs like a dead body. He is bite again! As much as you want! ?
YYY: Pause button xD

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №58635
 14.01.2012
Sanser: So it’s nice when you type a dumb question in Google, and there’s a lot of pages with exactly the same question. There is such pride. And you’re calm about yourself, you’re not the only idiot on earth.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №58634
 14.01.2012
The seventh screw is the most humane of operating systems. Now in the Start menu itself appeared the item "Uninstall Skyrim". Wanda is trying to save me.

[ + 49 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №58633
 14.01.2012
Accidentally listened to a cigarette:
"My husband seems to have learned about Igor. He doesn’t say anything, but every time I come to him, he fucking fuck. I go, and so zero, I don’t want to. So, I think, give me such a lover?"

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №58632
 14.01.2012
The teacher (a man "a little" over 50) is upset about the written checklist, saying how stupid we are in the shoes.
I, breathing, the neighbor to the party:
This is fucking troll!
Stiring behind the shoulder:
Do you think I am a troll?
I, pale red and blue of horror:
Not that you, Ivan Ivanovich!
I love studying, I love studying!
The audience slept.

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №58631
 14.01.2012
Web developer forum. Spambot created the theme "The best young prostitutes of Moscow". Prices are stated in the text.
First comment: Something hurts cheap.
Second comment: Young because. work in the portfolio.

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №58630
 14.01.2012
Do you have a Twitter?
YYY: NEA
YYY: I was there, my dad signed on me, and that was the end.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №58629
 14.01.2012
Letter from two sanitary officers:

I am a water person, I am a water person who would talk to me.

I’m an engineer, I’m an engineer, I’ll send the talk to her.

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