SMS from my brother (a devil fan):

I finally bought myself a gift disc of the devil 3 in a box, etc. A thousand rubles. Do you know what lies there? 2 kilobytes file with a link to download the game BLEAT! >_<

Go to the cat exhibition tomorrow.
Why Why?
What does it mean why? There will be coaching! Who are you!! by Fuck! You don’t like coconut?!! to
I’m afraid I won’t leave there alone...

Ilya
Hi, this is Vichy. Do you know where the smoke is?

Egor
This is Artem. I have no idea, to be honest...

We have a double apartment. He went down the stairs from the bedroom, slid down, counted all the steps with the fifth point. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Zelo fervent supporters of the immutability of the Russian language often hope that the Russian language is rich in verbs and without foreign words. It is a pity, they forget, that it is the ability of licking out of all the opposite-transparent languages a valuable vocabulary and then licking it in its own way, drawing out a variety of stylistic profits, in fact, and has rewarded our language with such a wealth of lexicon, which these purists, in fact, and grasp so furiously, sending out evil donnervetters about, paradoxically, the continuation of that process, the fruits of which are for them the subject of the lush of patriotism.

(Man and Wife)
M: You’re that, don’t bite too much tomorrow. I will arrive at midnight.
and oh! The role games! I am a peach.
The main thing is not to turn into a pumpkin by midnight.

XXX: What did you say?
Thank you for being alive!and c)

Tatiana C........: My son in the kindergarten had a new teacher who taught the Bible to the children. There are, of course, Muslims and atheists in the group, where are they not? This puts a lot of pressure on the children’s psyche. So my son became afraid of God more than my grandmother. Such a convenient method of education was chosen by the teacher.
Igor Ivanov: So it is known: reading the Bible leads to atheism... You can try with the same success to instill love for the army by reading the army statutes.

Georgian and Japanese

A delegation from Japan arrived in a Georgian village.
The chairman of the collage of the host party was a very representative man – weighing 150 kg and 2 meters in height, well, and, as it is appropriate, grown from head to foot – neither to give nor to take a giant from the fairy tale of the Japanese samurai.
On the evening of the separation, the Georgian side, as appropriate, pulled out a barrel of wine and a pig. The chairman was sitting at the head of the table, instead of a glass he used a two-litre fruit vase and the pig ate (A very important point!!) In the following way, he poured salt and broke a large piece of meat (as in old times on big parties).
At one moment, a little Japanese, sitting nearby, poured wine on his pants, and the chairman, not thinking long, poured salt, so that the spot was easy to wash off.
There was no limit to the Japanese horror!! to

In 1991, I was at the wedding of a friend. It was held at the Slavic Bazar restaurant. One of the drinks was vodka and champagne. The people fought quickly. I remember having a long debate on political topics with the grandmother of the bride. She, as is the case for the older generation of those years, defended the Communists, and I, as is the case for the younger generation of those years, actively defended them and defended the “Democrats”. Then I remembered that it was like a struggle we had, though sharp, but as such decent.

The next day, when the wedding video was shown, it turned out that I, in a dress with a tie, with a completely messy look, stood above the table, in front of the poor woman who was stuck in the grandmother’s chair, and wrapped up with the tongue, but very loudly promise her to hang someone on the lanterns, and that “we’ll still deal with these fools.” The grandmother’s eyes are frightened, as at night in the street when the hooligans are attacked.



Also on the video were footage of how I handed meals in Kiev. I tried to recall how this happened, and there was some fuzzy memory that they were giving some cakes, and I was still surprised that something was rolling out of the cake on the side...



When I watched this video on the second day in the circle of guests and that grandmother, it was really embarrassing. It is good that the plans described above were, so to speak, not the main plot in that video...

The post of Russia.

I live in China. On Friday, he sent himself 30+ kg of catalogues from the exhibition from Shanghai to Guangzhou. Specifically asked to send the simplest post of China. Not in a hurry and would like to be cheaper. They said that the package will arrive in 5 days. Today Sunday (2nd day), at 8 a.m., I was awakened by a call from the courier of the postal service. At 9 o’clock in the morning, I had a box of catalogues at home.

This is how email works in "normal" countries.

When I was a teenager, there lived a girl five or seven years older than me. I was very dry on her, and she immediately noticed it. Gradually I grew up, and one day, on my eighteenth birthday, when we were going to celebrate, she approached me right in the middle of the yard and said:
You’ve grown up, you’re 18, you’ve grown up and you’ve grown up. Most importantly, you can have sex. I want to give you a gift that you have long dreamed of. Here is he. This is brick.

What do I remember "Frankenweenie"?
The fact that on the phrase "...get them in the brains!" in the room someone’s child racked up hell.

The three-fingered freezer has two very funny cases from his life.

The song combines music of the 90s and contemporary music.
U: You say it’s like the music of the 90s was in the last century.
X :...
by :?
Q: Did you understand what you said now?

<Aaron> Here is another story brother brought. He served in some Tyumen part, part was next to the brewery. And the entire population of the nearby village served a small natural need under the fence of one old partisan. They drank somehow together the flag of the brother's part and the entity of the old man, and the old man swore on all the ways of all the soldiers and drinking neighbors, threatening to let the wires under tension under the fence. Flag-de slightly wise decided to become, the type of discovery watched and there about such showed, nothing is. I decided to check immediately on the spot. The grandfather swallowed the cable, the flag stretched the width and licked on it with taste, on the wire it would be. Only one thing he did not guess - his grandfather worked in some research institute and for some reason brought home a half-toraton transformator of 80 kilovolt, from which he asked for a cable. Eb@zero flag so that fingerprints are left on the #we))

“Lera, if you say AC/DC is old, I’ll fuck you!
The Old: 3

I’ve always wondered why cats, for example, have legs and horses have legs.
The cat doesn’t jump :D
You weren’t at my house at five in the morning.

I saw a new viral advertisement from Danon. Mom feeds cows, dad drinks cows, we all take care of crows, we doom them, we get milk, and uncle comes and takes milk from us... After the phrase that some uncle just takes milk from them, extracted by such hard work, advertising and I don’t want to watch, and Danon immediately appears to be the enemy of the people.

Cooleach: The Chief arrived today on a new steep car.
Cooleach: I appreciated what he said to me, “Sasha, if you set goals and fulfill them, approach my tasks responsibly and work long and hard in the evenings, I’ll buy a better car next year.