bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №112068
 14.04.2015
XXX: You’re an adult already, so when will you stop wasting time on this shit?
yyy: In particular, thanks to "this figured" I earn five times as much as you, guy. literally.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №112067
 14.04.2015
- the restaurant "Eat what they give"

Sorry, but a similar name "Jričedali" is already occupied by a restaurant of Georgian cuisine.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №112066
 14.04.2015
On March 19, the car was handed over for body repair. I got 25. and 44k. On the 11th of April, a two-ton Japanese monster crashed into the left side from all the way. The serviceman on the call came to the place of the accident, while on the eye estimated in 200k. I call him today - "Download a discount, second order in a month?"
And " of course!" is the answer.
And they probably whispered about themselves - "You are our feeder!"

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №112065
 14.04.2015
Today, a boy brought two eggs painted in silver to his class and said that without them Gagarin would not have flown.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №112064
 14.04.2015
In a country where everything is bought and sold, the worst thing is that human life is worthless.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №112063
 14.04.2015
About “how much shit people have to do to be so afraid.”

In 2003, in a supermarket in the center of Stockholm, the Minister of Foreign Affairs of Sweden, Anna Lind, was murdered by a mentally ill Mikhail Mikhailovich.

One member of parliament recalled a similar case with Prime Minister Olof Palme and suggested that ministers go with a guard.

The rest of the parliament almost unanimously voted against. The government should not be afraid of the people.

Until now, even the highest ranks in Sweden go to work by bicycle or by tram, without any bodyguards.

But there are countries where the most stunned deputy rides with a flash, and if the minister appears in a supermarket - about this tomorrow in the newspapers write...

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №112062
 14.04.2015
This is import substitution.
In just two days, the anecdotes about Mikhalkov completely displaced the anecdotes about sanctions, Obama and Merkel in the spotlight.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №112061
 14.04.2015
Remove Paphos and cheeks. With the violation of which rights do you fight? In a country where 70 years of atheism has been densely planted? Yes, you, the damnants, who always think that they are all offended, underestimated and constantly put some goods in their greedy open mouths. Or do you have a breakdown from being banned from dancing in the church?
The first generally surprised, there is a person who lives only with a spinal cord and even writes something on the Internet. The phenomenon, the right word.
------------
Even with the cancellation of concerts and performances at the request of various initiative groups of believers. It is not up to you to decide where to go, what to watch and what to listen to.
And yes, the law on the protection of the feelings of believers without a similar law on the protection of the feelings of non-believers is also a violation of our rights and a direct violation of the constitution.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №112060
 14.04.2015
Mom and daughter go, approach the zebra, and no one misses them.The daughter asks: Mom and where are all these uncles and aunts in the car? I roasted

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №112059
 14.04.2015
The little boy began to crawl. Today, to our great surprise, we went to the kitchen. Okay, it started to crawl, and the palms. I follow him, I watch.
And here the little one completely purposefully breaks into the room to his grandfather, his great-grandfather. I have to say, since his grandfather's legs were denied, his character has completely ruined, and we see him once a month - he is more and more at night in the kitchen.
And here the little one adds to the promised door and knocks on it with all his little strength. To my surprise, the door opens, and the shutter quickly floats inside. His grandfather looks after him and says:
What, little boy, has the world suddenly become big and interesting?
Then the former geologist looks out the window:
Do you know how big and interesting it is?

[ + 30 - ] [10 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №112058
 14.04.2015
Christianity is the belief that if you telepathically call your master a cosmic zombie-Jew, who is the father of himself, and symbolically eat his flesh, he will remove from your soul the influence of the evil force that appeared there because a woman made of a rib eaten the magical fruit of a naussky speaking snake. It is logical, right? and ;-)

[ + 20 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №112057
 14.04.2015
Marvel can record an interesting spin-off to Avengers and other superhero cycles - about guys who devoutly rebuild the road, insert new glasses into buildings, place lighting lanterns... And call, well I don't know, the "Iron Guard Command". October_Cat

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №112056
 14.04.2015
yyu: Today I saw such... an Internet club called "Catharsis" and the Google Chrome logo.
yyu: Fuck, it’s even more epic than Odessa Zoo "Gurman".

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №112055
 14.04.2015
In Skype, they threw a link to the sex shop, and the rubber ass offered there.
[20:24:44] Lydia Raevskaya: the football! We need to warn, well.
[20:24:56] buy in the house, Lida
You still have a lot of shit in the house.
[20:25:11] Lydia Raevskaya: The thing is definitely useful
[20:25:23] you will put flowers there
[20:25:31] Lydia Raevskaya: Hercules can be stored in it
[20:25:49] hhhhh: hide the asshole
[20:25:55] the horrors will live there
[20:26:07] Lydia Raevskaya: It probably stretches well. Podi, and the feet in it can be warm in cold winter evenings
[20:26:33 Lydia Raevskaya: and if she still vibrates - the face can be massaged
No shame in putting guests on the table.
[20:27:03] Lydia Raevskaya: a filled dish can be placed there. by Mamalagu.
[20:28:18] how cool - a multifunctional device comes out
[20:28:22] xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
[20:28:29] Lydia Raevskaya: the urine analysis in it to the clinic can be carried
[20:28:56] Lydia Raevskaya: cake to decorate. Press from there like from a confectionery bag.
[20:29:48] bhhkh: it will get old - it will be a fun pillow
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
[20:30:31] though I’m not sure

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №112054
 14.04.2015
When my daughter was six months old, she was asked at work what her granddaughter’s name was. He replied, “I don’t know.” In response to the confused views of colleagues said: "The bride calls her 'Joponoga', and the wife- 'my girl'"

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