bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 24 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №117301
 14.08.2015
> in the Netherlands. Third but the capital.

Khahaha, a man, the “third capital” of every city-millionaire. And Novosibirsk for its own - the third capital, and Krasnoyarsk, and Voronezh. Just outside of your city don’t talk about it – they’ll laugh.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №117300
 14.08.2015
Gia_manul: Like if your father still thinks you’re a demo version and a normal baby will soon be born.
Argont: In order for the second child to also need a psychiatrist, it can be said that he is just a backup copy of the first.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №117299
 14.08.2015
What is this new word "remove"? Reduction of something? Type - "help me ears"- for example?

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №117298
 14.08.2015
If your husband's mistress was really smart (well, not stupidly started a relationship with a married man, but just wanted a man-party to make romantic encounters, but without scattered socks, feeding with a sunburn and without waking up every morning next to someone's face), you would think that the mistress does not exist in nature, and the husband is faithful, and a swan!

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №117297
 14.08.2015
As the owner of the nine, I can say the following.
The bumper there is actually worn. Steel shell, covered with wood plastic. Fuck him to break.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * *
As a sofa psychologist and auto expert, I can say the following.
In the source, most likely, the author confused VAZ-2114 and VAZ-2109 (93). Because of poor knowledge of the game. The funny plastic buffer of the 14th is really easy to break off, he himself was a repeated witness to this.
And the bumper "nine" is actually hollowed. They can destroy enemies.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №117296
 14.08.2015
Artem Kliatchkine (living in Belgium)

In the days, the girl, being in a mood hungry and angry, tried to arrange a scandal because of the fact that the pasta was squeezed not with parmesan, and the gran padano. You can’t tell them at all, but I said nonsense. Picture with oil: a broken European child scandals because of parmesan. My wife and I couldn’t stand it and started roasting, adding to the insult an insult.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №117295
 14.08.2015
All kinds of ransomware dresses, bouquets, photoshoots, restaurants, limousines in the overwhelming majority of cases are needed by a woman, and for a man this day - shake your teeth, open your wallet and smile boldly, so that your bride is pleasant.

All this stuff is needed by parents and relatives.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №117294
 14.08.2015
Stargazer Upgrades Windows 10 to Windows 7

PS Basically, that’s all you can say about Windows 10.

[ + 28 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №117293
 14.08.2015
Automated Testing D:
X: I will stumble
X: Write them a tueva huču test
x: And it turns out my tests are very bad: "They find bugs"
X: So they need to be turned off :D
X: And the bugs are good, they cannot be touched.
X: They are "expected"
X: I turned off my tests – I’m fired. When I was confused, they hired me at all.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №117292
 14.08.2015
Diamond: MIO, and I’ve always been confident that I speak the language of diplomacy.
Diamond: And only the wife cried: Stop mothering!

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №117291
 14.08.2015
Something is wrong in a country where drunk prosecutors rush on sober bikers.

by KONDEXIII

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №117290
 14.08.2015
I go on the street. A little behind are father and son. My father is 40, and my son is five years old.
and Dad:
To communicate with people, you need to read a lot. And know a lot of clever words. Then you will know what to say in response. You were called a gorilla. And if you had read it, you would have said, “You are a macaca! The Makaka! Your ass is red!” You do not know that word. So he kept silent and ran to complain to me.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №117289
 14.08.2015
I thought here: if Serdyukov could steal billions of rubles from the budget, then maybe we are paying too much taxes to that budget?

[ + 17 - ] Comment quote №117288
 14.08.2015
The dog eats the cat’s dry food, he saw it in the grave. Do not give or go?
Giving or not giving is your right. Only feed the dog.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №117287
 14.08.2015
We sit down, we drink tea, the wife looks in the window at our new microbus :in_love:
I: And you can work now, if anything. Wedding for example.
She: ah, and drive together with all our children - to immerse in the atmosphere :wink:
I: Yes, and drive right before registration. The attraction is called "Think Again".

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №117286
 14.08.2015
[16:42:55] Josephine Katelo > One of them was cooking a potato and waiting for it to emerge.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №117285
 14.08.2015
Correspondence between the Supplier (P) and the Customer (Z).
From you the grandmothers came.
Hunt in the neck of these old women.)

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №117284
 14.08.2015
The comments sometimes remind me of an ancient story from the pre-Internet era.

Editing is a delicate matter. A special delicacy is needed.
I remember one editor who had a painful passion for scratching.
So I decided to joke with him. I bring him the little-known sonnet of Shakespeare.
The editor overwhelmed him.
I bring him another sonnet of Shakespeare.
The editor removed him.
I have five sonnets of Shakespeare. The editor says:
What are you wearing all of Shakespeare’s sonnets? You would at least "Poems in Prose" Turgenev for Diversity brought!

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №117283
 14.08.2015
Mr. proud > What time will you leave tomorrow after work?
J@h > Did you want to ask at what time will I be released from slavery tomorrow?
Mr. proud > Okay, don’t get overwhelmed. Slavery is your free choice =)
J@h > That is.. )

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №117282
 14.08.2015
To the technical support of our small Internet provider calls the customer:

It all worked, and suddenly the internet fell.

By habit, I begin to suggest pressing the “Start” button, opening the command line... The client breaks my monologue in half a word:

Before I called, I had already whispered with the drum. Now you have to bite!

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