bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №99249
 15.06.2014
XXX: The idea came that dogs are created by people who need a friend on a rope. Cats are those who love independence.
yyy: Ugu, and hamsters are those who do not want to complex because of their excess weight;)

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №99248
 15.06.2014
and...
Stroke during childbirth. Half of the brain in a bloody mesiv. I write without mistakes and in the correct literary language. And I say just that - give me it, like his, on the letter K. Yes, it's a shit.
and...
Try to imagine a strip of paper on which you write the answer and read it right away. If you do, you will speak slowly, but normally.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №99247
 15.06.2014
xxx: I bought a screwdriver here
[15:13:16] xxx will be a deadly number
[15:13:19] xxx: cleaning the macbook
[15:17:02] xxx: xxx
[15:17:22] xxx: well okay - but I have a set of screws
[15:17:25] xxx: for every case
[15:17:32] xxx: which do not fit the macbook

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №99246
 15.06.2014
I spent a week with my parents. Mother is a trainee, father is an engineer. One evening, my mom read “50 Shades of Grey” and roasted the whole apartment. Something she talked to me and my father. My daddy was red, I was red too.)
They’re 40 now, and I always feel like they’re younger than me!))

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №99245
 15.06.2014
He loves football in the first place, counter strike in the second, and me in the third. So we live.
In the third WoT. Glad to get in the 10th.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №99244
 15.06.2014
#biology@vk: Turtles of the Chinese trionix species urinate through their mouths. Urea is excreted through the papillas in the throat, and then the turtles, submerging their head in the pebbles, wash it with water.
Zloradskij: I know a couple of people, and at quite high positions, who can even get rid of their mouth. Not even sinking their heads into the bowls, but directly on the tribune.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №99243
 15.06.2014
In the gild-chat WoW:
Who has nothing to do now? Are there good people?
There are no good people in the horde.
Zzzz: There are no people in the horde at all

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №99242
 15.06.2014
Today in the store: "All in 39".

has entered. I chose the goods I needed. I’m at the box and it’s my turn. I extend...

I will not sell you without a passport.
I stand, silently trying to understand and understand what I have heard.
Why are you silent? I will not sell without a passport. It is law!

For another 10 seconds I looked her in the eyes, realized that as such, I don’t need a swabber and went home...I’ll give the swabber to the same awkward guard.

This means that man has recycled.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №99241
 15.06.2014
Are you sitting naked on the couch again?! to
“No, you guys, look at me!
and AAA! My favorite cat!! to

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №99240
 15.06.2014
I work on the railway. I read the news on Yandex: "Provodnikov could not defend the title of world champion in the version of WBO". Immediately the thought of why the title of world champion should protect some conductors =\

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №99239
 15.06.2014
From the hubra, the topic of the invention of the device for climbing the slopes of the walls, after studying the hexagonal paws:
The manufacturer may take the
Notes
The parking problem will finally be solved.
Cars on the sidewalks.
I cleaned the car from the window.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №99238
 15.06.2014
xxx: a man by the name of the head came to us in the office
Xxx: cute, in the seventh square lies
Why am I writing this to you...Lena, this is your chance!

[ + 22 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №99237
 15.06.2014
XXX: And the Mummy trolls talk to the bucks, and they themselves eat sandwiches with wheat, and as if they should.
YYY: Of course it should be. Imagine if it was the opposite.

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №99236
 15.06.2014
From the city forum:

xxx: a garage was hacked, discs for 14, rubber folds were removed from the car. If anyone can see, call on the phone.
Q: What type of car is it suitable for?
Zzz: yyy, removed and now you don’t know where to put it? I had to rewrite the mark in the garage.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №99235
 15.06.2014
Someone is calling me from the left number, don’t you want to talk?
Let’s go...crocodile toy store, I’m listening to you...hm, weird, hanged the phone
O_O

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №99234
 15.06.2014
With me in the same office sits a Soviet model woman (!) Higher education, which speaks about this: "I’m here, well, that’s in general, you understand? I say to Ivanych - you give it, and he - and how to give it when it is..." Or: "Natasha, give me what I just thought about, well that, well that, what I need to do the question that... well you understand!". And so all day!
...
But not being able to express a thought in simple words is, forgive me, a shit.
and...
Stroke during childbirth. Half of the brain in a bloody mesiv. I write without mistakes and in the correct literary language. And I say just that - give me it, like his, on the letter K. Yes, it's a shit.

[ + 30 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №99233
 15.06.2014
It seems to me that the most serious ontological error lies in the medieval discrete perception of the concept of “man” – “not man”. In the modern world, considering the discoveries of animal intelligence, the creation of artificial, as well as the apparently irreparable animal stupidity of the habitant, it is more appropriate to consider the degree of humanity as a gradation, the property of the phenotype manifested to one degree or another. by Napr. based on the IQ scale. In this case, it will be possible to avoid the absurd situation, when the plankton is considered a person with all rights (including political) only on the basis of a certain structure of the limbs and the ability to pronounce sounds that resemble connected speech.
Zloradskij

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №99232
 15.06.2014
OOOO OOOO! This is a whole story! Full of adventures, dangers, vampires, monsters, aliens, dragons, drugs...

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №99231
 15.06.2014

In the course of the game, the hero gets into a concentration camp of death, everywhere fascists, blood, intestines, killers robots. He goes to the prisoners in the barracks, and in the dark and dirty place of the barracks he sees - toilet paper! Toilet paper in the conglomerate.
Now I can say that in computer games I have seen everything!

[ + 28 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №99230
 15.06.2014
The paradoxes of life:
You ride a bus, earn your mind exactly as much as you need, leave time to work on your project - loch and downshift. Break your ass on two jobs, one of which is physical, in order to pay a loan for a parking lot and tablets, phones - you work well, you understand life.

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