bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №152806
 15.08.2019
In my eyes, two 6-year-old boys are crossing on a trail: one on a self-driving car, the other on a machine. The one on the selfie shouted, “Hello, let’s make friends! The second walked around and shouted, “I have no time! “” and pointed

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №152805
 15.08.2019
I just want to know why the coat clings to the door pin only when I’m in a bad mood.

The door is trying to embrace you.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №152804
 15.08.2019
If you are surrounded by goats and lambs, is it time to get out of the bread?

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №152803
 15.08.2019
Every time I hear Igor Cornelyk’s song “There is a ballet ticket, there is no tram ticket,” I remember a ballet trip in Düsseldorf. My wife and I visited a daughter who was working on a work visa. Once the cultural program of the visit included a visit to the local theatre, where a touring ballet group performed. So we go to the ballet! On the train!! And my daughter warns us not to buy tickets!!! “How so,” we are surprised, knowing that the daughter’s unlawful behavior is not characteristic. “We have tickets to the theater, and the public transportation is free,” the daughter explains. “What connection?” – we still wonder. “Everything is very simple and logical,” says the daughter, who seems to have already begun to break away from her native soil. “If everyone goes to the theater in their cars, there will be traffic jams, and there will be not enough parking. Therefore, the municipality and encourages people to travel by public transport.” In principle, it is clear that for the city authorities, the convenience of people is much more important than parking fees and fines. Could it be something else? “I have a ballet ticket.”

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №152802
 15.08.2019
What is the power of electricity?
It is when there is no mind, but there is power.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №152801
 15.08.2019
I bring my daughter to kindergarten. We talk.

Dad, let’s talk to you?

Go to)

What do you want me to be when I grow up?

I want you to grow up to be a good person.

Am I talking about the profession?

Your daughter decides. I want the job to be fun and it was interesting to do it.

I chose this profession, but I don’t know how it’s called.

Tell me, I am curious ?

I want to work in the aquapark. I come in the morning, I come from the hill and if the hill liked, I allow to ride on it. And I go home. And so every day.

Do you want to sell ice cream?

No, in the summer they normally buy, and in the winter who needs it? I need stability.

Well, normal work, I like it ?

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №152800
 15.08.2019
I remembered the story with my wife. Once a long time ago she worked in a office store, she liked everything, she always talked about the work with interest. And to see vanity, work with customers, with the product laid its footprint. And because she sometimes talks in her dreams at night, the conversation about the office did not make herself wait long.

by @$ “B” is 34. 20 rubles of rubles.

“Oppa, I got it!” I thought I.

Is it an office store?

Yes, yes... Hello...

I: What do you have?

A ruble of 20 rubles.

I: And what more?

The pencil... the pencil... the pencil... the pencil. Chapter 34: The Laws.

I: Do you have notes in a circle?

No... No... No... No... No.

And in the triangle?

I thought again... no.

I: Is there a globe of Ukraine?

And again, no... no.

I: Well, what do you have then?

A book of twenty rubles!



I couldn’t ask any more ? ?

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna