bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 71 - ] Comment quote №20379
 15.09.2009
XXX is
What is the synonym for the word ' came'?

YYYY
slowed

XXX is
Of the 15 respondents, only three wrote 'stepped'

[ + 67 - ] Comment quote №20378
 15.09.2009
SE[re]GA: And I cut off at the last couple, and woke up from the fact that the teacher was singing the crib "I do not lie down on the edge" I raise my head and think:"All my fuck" but no, it was singing to another guy, who also slept =)

[ + 75 - ] Comment quote №20377
 15.09.2009
XXX - In China for bribery executed
Yyy – And in Iran – for homosexuality...
Zzz – Generally speaking, our officials would be executed both in China and Iran.

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №20376
 15.09.2009
Q: How to bend a spoon with a look?
A: Throw a heavy look at her from above.

[ + 61 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №20375
 15.09.2009
A neighbor in the apartment, being a blonde not only in hair color, but also in the state of the soul, brought her glamorous cat from the house.
I ask: Has the block hit the sky for a month, walking around your facade?
She (with sincere surprise): No, we have a high fence. Where are the fleas from?

[ + 74 - ] Comment quote №20374
 15.09.2009
We have a service called "Service for the implementation of electricity transmission services" - abbreviated SRU. Today, the chief of the same service from Zhygulevsk calls, suckles from laughter, says - I apologize, but I am from the ZPO of the SRU.

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №20373
 15.09.2009
Now Sisadmin came in, stumbled onto the bowl and cried out loudly: "Ait your mother!" =)

[ + 83 - ] Comment quote №20372
 15.09.2009
He is:
Do you love cooking or not?
She is:
To be honest, I don’t like it.
But for the sake of a loved one, I’ll be ready for that too.)
He is
When a man is referred - he is always in a good mood)))
She
I’m embarrassed to ask...what do you do? 😉

[ + 75 - ] Comment quote №20371
 15.09.2009
― What are you doing?
― The History of the World
― It’s really good :)

[ + 83 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №20370
 15.09.2009
Fl4tron: I go to the institute by electric car and every day, on the wall of some warehouse, I see the inscription 'Nazism is always in fashion. So, I want to express a huge thank you to the person who added ' in the middle of the piddars' before this inscription. thank you!

[ + 80 - ] Comment quote №20369
 15.09.2009
Explain to me what Sophism is.
Tell me, are you a man?
1 is??? to
1: How is it
2: And tell me, Jora... are you a pitcher?
1 by Choo?
2: Ask for an Explanation
So I have to answer stupid questions.
2: Yes or No
1: No of course.
2: And tell me, Jora, are you masturbating?
Do you explain philosophy correctly?
2: Yes
2: Who doesn’t do it?
1: Let’s say yes
But agree, masturbating is like having sex with yourself.
1 – – – –
And since you are a man, onying, you have sex with a man.
2: Therefore, you are a pedorras
To ask you once again...

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №20368
 15.09.2009
News from Lenta.ru:
14.09 09:34 Global warming threatens the quality of beer

— — —

Yippidy yi yi yippity yay!

[ + 14 - ] Comment quote №20367
 15.09.2009
The more a person doubts the correctness of his point of view, the more zealous he defends it.
by Yuri Tatarkin

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №20366
 15.09.2009
It was in the year of Edak... Although what a difference, the point is that jeans were a shortage at the time. I came to my youth business in a glorious city.
and Vladivostok. This city, by the way, is a port and on the local market, if the mints are not noticed, you could buy these most branded jeans. It is expensive, but there is a deficit. I looked around and went to that market.
Walked between the ranks, on the shelves of course no jeans found, but his interest shone. After a while, a grandmother comes to me.
The Gypsy is not a Gypsy, but a shirt and a coat with jackets on her is ten pieces. Among them, I think not only jeans, the refrigerator can be hidden. He looks me in the eyes and asks if I need jeans at a similar price. So clear the pen, after them and came. It makes my mysterious signs, typically - observe the conspiracy and take some container. Getting out of his folds new in a transparent pack of pants, then beech, jeans, on, say, throw, will it be okay? I pretended, as if it was normal – one hundred and fifty says, as if I had already gotten in my pockets. We both knew the price. While I got the money, she put the jeans in a bag and rolled back into the folds. Money is worth thinking. Then she made dreadful eyes and shouted, “Militia, let’s run!” The package fell into my hands and into some cracks. Well, I also broke somewhere - so that the dream would not be taken away.
While in the tram, everyone could not admire their jeans.
I will pull them out a little because of the sinuses, look at the firm's seam or label and be happy. Oh, I think, now as not rough, but on the dances all my girls. I was so happy until I reached my relatives. There the bag spread out, the pants got, and there is not the jeans, but the jeans. The trousers are alone. They just divided these jeans by the motto. And it hurts me even to cry, because the second half of the money is still not, even if I find through an announcement in the newspaper the happy owner of this second half. In the evening, my cousin came out of work.
I threw my head on his shoulder and poured out insults on his hometown. He looked closely, knocked on my head with his index finger and thought. Although, he says, everything is not so bad, if reasoned logically.
Tomorrow we go to the market together. What was not so bad, I thought all night, but apparently with logic I had problems.
I went to the market and he left me at a coffee shop. Wait, he says, I’m now sinking into the crowd. Probably not for an hour. He comes, dull, but pleased and his jacket on his chest is melting off. Sitting on the tram, we go.
He flashed the lightning and got his jeans because of his mushrooms. Two brushes and two brushes, all as required. Truth without a package and hell like shit. He says, wear it. No, well, of course, I was all in gratitude, promised as soon as I came home, immediately send money. And only he looked at me and said, it's your, say, jeans, you paid them yesterday, I didn't spend my money a penny. So, I ask, does that lady have a conscience? Regarding the conscience, he says, I don’t know, but in that logical chain the final changes from the one who shouts first: “Militia, let’s run!”

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №20365
 15.09.2009
Tell your sisters not to look me in the eyes.

[ + 51 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №20364
 15.09.2009
I bought a communicator for 25 pieces, which is significant for me. I think: I have an unrest in the area, but in the bus, you can bustle, you need to buy a watch to look at it. The classic. Then I think I look strange – in classical watches and a T-shirt. I bought a costume 3. Then I think: "In a suit with a backpack not to go to the universe, and with a package is also ugly" - bought a portfolio. Looking in the mirror - A respectable young man, in a costume, with a clock, a portfolio, a communicator and a cheek. I cut my hair and put my hair back. Well, the image of a businessman had to be supplemented by the absence of maternal words and literate speech in general. have done. Sometimes after the couple comes a lecturer, who only reads lectures, and himself where t works. Now I work with him. This is the case. 😉

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №20363
 15.09.2009
Russian police officer consistently occupies the first place ''the most purchased and sold goods of the year'

[ + 74 - ] Comment quote №20362
 15.09.2009
Advertising shield over the wedding store "Will you get married? Stop it!"

[ + 66 - ] Comment quote №20361
 15.09.2009
A long time ago, a couple of years ago, when the campaign to combat non-licensed software began, the CEO of a small firm ordered to remove the pirate screw on all the compasses and install Linux. The phrase gender:
"To use a pirate screw is not permitted by law, and a license - education.

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №20360
 15.09.2009
xxx: Listen, so tell me, is it normal to get a girl dating with the fact that you divorced her to cook to eat?
YYY: I would even say – optimal)

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