bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №117390
 16.08.2015
I think I’m driving calmly.
She: Hey, you guys, how "I’m fat"
He (thinkingly): No... you can still learn to drive...

[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №117389
 16.08.2015
Well, in every universe of comics and games such a shit. Batman always has a super-plan, Deadpool poohers on everyone along with their plans, the Witch can cut out any wickedness, Gordon quietly gives puzzles to entire civilizations, the Nouneim-guard from the skyrim would hit all of the above, if not the arrow in the knee, Jenson generally asks not to ask for zits, Vaas has not yet said what is madness, Trevor fucking on all the Vaas there, Max is generally immortal, as long as there is anesthetic, Grayson Hunt iron-foot distributes all the epic sockets, Bond asks to crack but not to confuse, Forty-Seventh, looking at him unwillingly repairs the snack, Impy is just epic, his marriots are raised, Weah is And you get a bullet! Everyone gets a bullet!and "

/////////////////////////////////

Who are all these people?! to

[ + 28 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №117388
 16.08.2015
News: "University of Berkeley has introduced a course on the ‘Game of Thrones’ program"
Dormidon: Scuco, and I was tormented by the history of the CPSU and scientific communism.
Dormidont: Fantasy too, but very boring.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №117387
 16.08.2015
My husband’s theory:
Can there be an intuitive connection between a dog and a cat? And why is everyone sure that it is only the trainer who can tell the dog to bring a stick? Can the dog go to the toilet? Why doesn’t anyone think that it’s dogs and cats that capture the brains of grandmothers, who then hold them 40 pieces in an apartment and feed them out of their pension?

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №117386
 16.08.2015
What are you doing with potatoes? Chicken or sausage?
I will be a chicken with sausage!

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №117385
 16.08.2015
XHH: Gave the girl to the temporary use of the notebook. A few days later, I asked how it worked. And she managed to ride a line on him in exchange for seven, set up a van. And all why? There, he says, the interface is more enjoyable. O_o said that she saw the video on the titer, burned up to sweat, and did not want to distract me from work.
WOW: That is so. You are married, either you or I.

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №117384
 16.08.2015
xxx: What is the fundamental difference between the 2/2 and 3/3 chart?
xxx: About the fact that you work a day more and rest too, I am in the course)
YYY: There is a fundamental difference. Two days in a row is just relaxing, and three is already drinking))

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №117383
 16.08.2015
After dinner with a new friend:
How about her cooking? :) Not getting sick?
Yes, no, it passed
In the sense, do you? The trouble has passed you, or came from where you did not expect it? ?

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №117382
 16.08.2015
The news
Minculture wants to transfer the remains of Sergei Rahmaninov from New York to the Novgorod region on the grounds that the composer’s grave in the United States is in an unsatisfactory condition.

Commentary on News:
John Dow: U.S. refused to re-enter Rahmaninov in Russia because Russia is in an unsatisfactory condition

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №117381
 16.08.2015
Interesting fact: Elephants and adult elephants are tied by the same rope. Adults can break it, but do not try, because in childhood they have already tried.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №117380
 16.08.2015
The xxx:
It was two days of summer and it was over.
YYYY :
It was a demo version. You can download the full version from your tour operator.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №117379
 16.08.2015
“Listen, let’s hang in the coworking, I have an idea for a start-up, I’ve already done a rise. Smash me out!
Go to the XEP!

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №117378
 16.08.2015
The main question – why? Why did he want to dispel him?
I: [VIDEO] The welder started cutting a gas balloon
...
Q: The main question is why? Why did he want to dispel him?

X: Maybe the pot wanted to do, who knows him? Welders are generally brave people who love fire, destruction and collective farms of foot materials. I have personally observed (I went away, of course) how the welder was finding out whether the pipeline was washed off gasoline by cutting that pipeline with an oxygen cutting machine. Then in the smoker, another welder told this how he cut off a piece of hose coming from a tank, purely to make a new pen to the electrode holder. The tank was with chlorine.

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №117377
 16.08.2015
xxx: The clock module is designed to work at temperatures at low temperatures, up to -10 ° C.
Farewell to Russia?
yyy: A hand that has equaled the temperature with the atmospheric air will no longer press the clock button. There is no point in the larger limits :)

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №117376
 16.08.2015
What a zombie people.

There are such people whom the profession forces to get up early (say, drivers of public transport, people who baking bread, etc.). For some reason, they don't drop the whole world on a car, and nobody feels like their family is more comfortable - on a steep car or a pedestrian.
But everybody worries about a man who goes to some hill in the morning to declare the text. And when normal people wonder where this man has a expensive car / clock, then they need to throw all the cacao.
For me, a baker or a tram driver needs a car more than a pop.

And then another comrade said that all children are kept by parents. Yes, they contain, but our parents worked, not crystallized.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №117375
 16.08.2015
A voice of despair from the street:

Daesh, he is a man! He does not understand anything!!! to

[ + 30 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №117374
 16.08.2015
In the United States in 1929, as a result of the Great Depression, hundreds of thousands of people were fired from work and needed assistance. Like mushrooms after the rain, various volunteer organizations arose.
Among such organizations was the Organization for Help in Need in the state of Atlanta.
The Annual Meeting for 1929 approved the report on the activities of the organization. They sent a letter to the governor asking for funding for next year. have received.
The committee did a huge job. The members of the committee organized charitable concerts, walked around apartments, gathered donations on the streets, wrote letters to rich people, spoke on the radio, published ads.
The annual financial report of the organization was perfectly prepared. It took into account everything – rental of premises, transport, communications, journeys, advertising, wages, premiums. Without clothes and shells, the donations were collected.
Only in the Ministry of Finance noticed a funny detail - the graphs "spending on aid to the needy" were not in the report...
The accounting balance sheet of the organization was reduced to one cent.

Mary White

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №117373
 16.08.2015
Are you not afraid of death?
I don’t like the beginning of the conversation.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №117372
 16.08.2015
We have a man in the neighboring street. Somewhere at two o’clock comes to his home on a tourist bus, parks, gets out of the luggage compartment and with a satisfied mouth rides 200 meters to the entrance. Lunch in the same way. And in general, bus drivers are classy, scattering songs from religious to heavy rock. In the morning, they leave the central station, greet each other and throw sweets out the windows. They are worn like in American films, but polite, even kebenimates do not send, unlike road drivers.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №117371
 16.08.2015
It is so delicious to spit them in the holy. One of the comments under the photo: Stefano Gabbana wears sandals with socks. How to live further?
...
The burning pudding!

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