Sex, scratches, rock and roll and union film!

The Russian football team defeated Argentina with 8:0.
This is the result of the Paralympic Games.
Which of the Russian football teams do you think disabled people play in?

The chat operator. Time of Full Night.
Oksana (agent of the operator):
Hello to Julia!
by July (Abonement)
Hi to.
*there is a long conversation on the topic of recovering the phone book from the stolen SIM card, and a general exchange of kindnesses, and advice from the operator to use the service of synchronization of the phone book on the MTS server*
and July:
thank you. It is a pity that it cannot be so.
and Oksana:
Yes, I agree, but if you use this service in the future, you will not have any more such difficulties.
and July:
The fucking! Are you a man too?! to
and Oksana:
The T-S-S! Just don’t tell anyone. and :)

If a blonde is natural, then this is the reason, if painted is an excuse.

Parents are burning in the kitchen. Mom beats the bowl, the beer folder at the table pulls and in the telecock wraps
Natka: mom whistle begins that he doesn't help, then the folder hand up raised
And he solemnly proclaims: Dear, I will give you a star! The light will be bla-bla-bla! In a few seconds, a towel comes into his head.)
Good that it’s not a crap ;)

I lie in bed with a sweet girl. He has already begun to fall asleep and shrink quietly, I look at the telephone.
Her leg was scratched, from a large lazy decided to scratch her on the leg of her beloved.
He, opening one eye, stared at me astonished for 5 seconds and asked:
Kat, what are you doing?
My feet chew.
(Long pause) Katie, this is my leg. And she doesn’t sneeze...

I will never eat avocado, I watched the broadcast that it is the most caloric fruit, and it makes you fat.
Yyy: Oh, and that you eat chewbacks is nothing.
XXX: I haven’t watched the show.

Domodedovo Airport, Adà on arrival passport check.
Tired Customsman and Tired Passenger
So, man, where did you come from?
From the Earth...
out

by Gonzo:
When trying to make fun of a guy with a nick "Norris, Chuck" all the cms fell. Don’t believe in tales after that.

I don't even know what is worse - Disney with his stupid but good series, or the cardinal network with the work of drunken addicts.