I ask my husband:
Sasha, please change your butterfly.
I’m too old for that shit.

Memento_mori: I was once taken to class on one kind of Eastern combat. Worked for a while. She pressed, stood on her fists, stretched - tired, in general. Once I was placed there in a sparring: my 50 kg weight and 164 cm of height against a man 190 cm of height and 100+ kg of weight... This is all you need to know about the benefits of Eastern combat for self-defense. But the Kadochnikov system works in such cases unsuccessfully :-)

Dear deceived man! I feel sorry for you, but I envy you.
If you are in a hurry not to get enough sleep on the rare days of corporations, friendships and other one-time entertainment events, then imagine how owls are in a hurry that do not get enough sleep every working day.

13th_Ka7aHe4: And you also installed the motion sensors incorrectly in the entrance, and now when it is dark, you are like an idiot mastering your hands, running back and forth and jumping to light up and finally the door and well in it became visible?

Previously, when watching a match between fighters from the CIS experienced deja vu at a time when they did not work ahead.

When, for example, the coach cries to the fighter (and the coach in 99.9% of cases cries in Russian), he said, "be left in the liver" - the second fighter hears it too. I would put a block in the liver area. But no, the first fighter strikes.

I finally understood where deja vu came from. They are Pokémon.

"Picacu, a lightning blow!"

And if the second coach orders his Pokémon to run away, the lightning strike passes past the target. And if the coach is silent, the blow hits the beast.

alal: found in the section of comments in the programming category

I know many languages...
Even a goat to talk to people like you.

Today the pre-school son tried to "divorce" to buy a phone:

How old was your phone when you were a child?
at the 29.
No to E-T!! to

A cat is a very mercantile creature, and comes to a person only in two cases: if it is cold or if it is hungry. If the cat is cold, then it settles on its knees, drizzling them abundantly with wool and periodically stinking, which apparently should depict the caviar. If the cat is hungry, she becomes across the keyboard and presents the owner with an empty ass: "You see? It is nothing!"
A cat can be breastfed, spit, thrown down, spit - it is useless. Once I even pulled out a wet towel from the package at hand and wiped out the cat's ass, unsatisfied with the hygienic state of the cat, which completely broke the cat's pattern. But to get rid of the ass in the monitor could not. It silently leaps back, and at some point you suddenly realize that instead of text you have a butt in front of your eyes again.

Volha

When I got drunk about the "Martian". Mark Watney clearly has Russian roots.

"Yes, of course, the isolant works almost in a vacuum. Isolation works everywhere and everywhere. Isolence is a gift of the gods, it needs to be worshipped. and c)

In order for the cat, which has wrapped the nest in your blanket, not to hinder you from sleeping at night, whistling, moving and licking, sometimes mistakenly touching your hand with your tongue, you need to let him sleep. But it is not necessary to turn around yourself. I tried to sleep today without moving. In a dream, for some reason, I saw Obama, to whom I stumbled with a metal pipe packed with oil.

A real conversation with a lady from an unknown office. Oh... Oh... Li...

D: Hi, I can talk to someone like that.
Hello, I am listening to you.
Q: Who do you have Katarina... this?
Q: And for you, why? Are you who at all?
D: So who is she for you?
T: It doesn’t matter
D: Let us decide it.
T: I can’t allow you that. There is a ritual consecrated for centuries, a tradition established, you must submit a request in three copies, on a stamp paper, written with gold ink, then I will consider it.
Q: Are you inadequate?
I am the God Emperor of Duna.

For some reason, I did not call.

To the girl, who was sitting at the last party all the time, studied well and never interfered with anything, and who in her IT department was cut in salary, we report:

It is time.

Hitsha – a poppy kypopt for your favorite filmocophia :))

xxx: new edition of barto poems for children.
xxx: "burning on the sun flag - as if I had a fire"
xxx: drawn boy with a tricolor
xxx: Something tells me that there was another flag in the original...

Good morning, who is this?
Unknown: Well, you just called me.
I called back to the missed.
Unknown: When was he?
Yesterday at approximately the same time.
Unknown is strange. I also called the missed one yesterday.
Requirements for Requirements :)

When my little daughter wants to cuddle, she makes an extremely smart face, as if she’s thinking a lot about something.
Now I look at people with very smart faces with caution.

Comments to the news "In the body of the bite air passenger found containers with unknown substance":
HH: Well... I am disappointed. No zombie apocalypse is foreseeable.
YYY: That is, do you claim that the T-Virus powder is a pretty well-known substance?? to

I went for anal sex.
With the words "will it hurt, and if I start screaming?" she took me to the toilet, saying that the sounds don’t spread from there.
Sitting on the toilet, and pronouncing "I’m just poaching", I started my business.
In my life, I will not think about anale.

Canakau: epto, heating included
Canakau: the battery is running out
Diamond: Hit the cold - it will freeze and cease to flow

Is the cat walking naked around the house?
YYYY: Yes
Yyy: The perverted wool
Tagged: exhibition cat