I walk around the apartment, the floor screams terribly.
I: Grandfather, and why our floors are so screaming, it is impossible to pass.
Father is lying.
I: Aaaah, it is clear.
I go on, in a few seconds it arrives.
Q: What other lies are there?I am beginning to think feverily
What a building! The battle under his nose completely dropped from his computer.

The opinion of a man in a magazine...I support!! to

Let them knock their eyelids, shoot their eyes, turn in front of the mirror, fear mice, chew from strong alcoholic beverages, complain that they have nothing to wear, late for dates, cry in the movie (for example, when Forest Gump meets Jenny at a rally in Washington DC or when they kill King Kong).A hundred times a day call moms, cook borsches, squeeze when they see cats and puppies, shower with babies, rejoice in the flowers, firmly believe that Ronald and Ronaldinho are the same footballer, the authorities of the car call "pipe" and "pipe", and the main technical characteristic is who said what color was in the first day and what was hoped on you in detail.
Please always stay feminine. And not because we love you just for that, but because we love you like that.

Fuck, yesterday in the electric wheel saw a very beautiful girl with a white bracelet on her hand... I didn’t really want to get to know if it wasn’t a yellow bracelet around the nameless finger :(

1: We will soon have a clan supplement!
Have you grown up a son?
My son has not yet been born...
1: Moreover, he is not even conceived yet.
Some kind of Gondon constantly disturbs him =D

he : - I found an article about anal sex [show her with a hint...]
She says, “I’m in shit.

Are you terrible?
alena_t: When not painted. Are you terrible?
When it is painted :D

<TherioN> Who are you going to sleep with?
<Lance> well they’re called blankets and pillows, they’re greedy for me
<TherioN> ah, I’ve heard – they’re pretty good in bed))
<Lance> I’ve never met anyone so gently ))

When it comes to money, people become much smarter.

An anecdote instead of an epigram - New Russian at a banquet in the United States: he eats, drinks everything in a row. A American stands next to him.
The Russian:
What is your name?
and Smith.
Eat it Smith.
I do not want.
Eat it hollow.
I eat when I want to eat.
I do not understand...
When I want to eat, I eat. When I don’t want to eat, I don’t eat.
You are just like an animal!

Yesterday, my wife came home with tears in her eyes and laughed. She goes to some expensive fitness center, where people pay a hundred and twenty thousand for a six-month subscription. All services are included, except solarium. To use the automatic solarium you need to buy a token and drop it into the coin receiver, after which the solarium is turned on for a few minutes. There is no staff in the room with a solarium.
I don’t know how, but four girls learned how to turn on a solarium without a token. All four suffered burns.

When I see that the hotel fan is not pulled out of the socket, the hangers in the closet are twisted, I am visited by the thought: "Do they naively think that I travel without a drill?"

Yesterday amusing... I wrote some Arabic.. in Arabic.. well I with the help of a Google translator translated Russian "go rest the perverted" and sent him some hieroglyphs... he called.. I dropped and.. well I decided to translate my Arabic phrase back to Russian... it came out "come to rest perverted"....

From Lenty.ru

"American accused a cat of downloading child pornography..."

The Odmin cats really exist.

X – What are you doing?
World Economic News for June.
Find out how to make a suitcase.)
U - sec
...
The Zimbabwean currency exchange rate fell to a record low of 1.2 billion Zimbabwean dollars for one U.S. dollar.

Dilvish: tell me a proposition in Russian that will be an introduction to the text on education in Russia
Lanriel: Pizzetz, citizens! 😉

My uncle decided to drink tea. He brings a cup of boiling water to his mouth and suddenly coughes in it, the splashes of tea fall into his face, instinctively pulling off his hand sharply, splashing out the tea of his legs, the second wrinkle of his hand to the side and the cup breaks against the wall. The quiet phrase through compressed teeth "good that wallpapers are washing"

Daddy
I go after the Heb.

Daddy
I see it hanging on the bush.

Daddy
Such a cute spot.

Daddy
I am going back, still hanging.

Daddy
And still cute...

Listed
and LOL

Daddy
I thought I brought it home...

Daddy
Upon closer examination, the topic appeared...

Listed
The O_O

Daddy
Yesterday I was pulled off the rope on the balcony.

Probably everyone who returns from drinking at night goes where the sober would never go.