bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №145797
 22.10.2017
Here is the first snow (Photo)
Why so small?
He just appeared a little before the deadline.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №145796
 22.10.2017
XXX is:
OMZ bought a simka with a direct city.
Previously, this number belonged to the T-Dam. Girls on the challenge.

During the day, everything is awkward, but at night you have to turn off, customers call on the old memory.

Although, Imho, could have agreed with somebody and put a redirect for the night.

YYY :
Buy a beginner prostitute.
Advertising is worth money.

[ + 25 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №145795
 22.10.2017
xxx: But with the games is not the same situation as with the movies, conditionally some Titanic of 1997 looks and now great, but here HL1 1998 or even the first Silenh Hill of 1999 now look gently so to themselves.
YYY: I do not have to! Compare DiCaprio in Jango and Titanic! In Titanic, he has a maximum of two or three polygons on the whole face, no wrinkles to see, all some smooth, like a plastic doll.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №145794
 22.10.2017
Mexmed is:
Advertising: "From Vnukovo to the Northern Ural! This is the weekend!"))

Mexmed is:
"For a weekend in Vorkuta! Unforgettable active rest and comfortable double room!"

by ATTA:
I was a sister.
Cut the cat.
I go to children's camp.
in the city of Vorkuta

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №145793
 22.10.2017
In hell, intellectuals will be given new high-tech protection against heat and sulfur every day.
But it will only be compatible with yesterday's boiler.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №145792
 22.10.2017
The Regular Eye

I am angry with the boss.
The proletarian fuck his lodge.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №145791
 22.10.2017
As our Finnish director says: "Hero margin is still better than the Morzher.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №145790
 22.10.2017
Tomorrow in the morning?
I don’t know, I’ll jump back.
I will wait for you.
Hachiko
touched

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №145789
 22.10.2017
The Regular Eye

I will go to Bali.
The waking ones.

Or the right ball.
Because they woke up?

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №145788
 22.10.2017
Oh, the sex shop moved, and I never had the time to go in! And how intriguing was the announcement on the opaque (in the heart) door: "Conservatives - NO CHARGE!". Imagination drew the line of the suffering - who behind the vibrator, who behind the rubber lady, and who is behind the cloth and the bracelets, - and here I break up with a scream: "I only have condoms!" And all of these are -"Yes, you are right"...

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №145787
 22.10.2017
I’ve been tricked to buy two identical versions of Harry Potter. One is Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone, the other is Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone.
The third part is Harry Potter and the Kidney Stone.
Harry Potter and the Rolling Stone. They fly there with Jagger and Richard on the butterflies at night. Smoking up, of course.
4: And Voland-de-Mort is on fire there.
“Harry Potter and Stoned Rolling Stones.”

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №145786
 22.10.2017
The xxx:
And now you review yourself and ask yourself: do you trust me? I will write you a receipt that I promise to return you $20'000'000 if you give me $1'000'000. But killing you and all your heirs is cheaper than fulfilling your obligations. Disappearing from the country is even cheaper. If it were an obligation to the state, it could have stopped me at the border, committed various unnecessities with me, and possibly returned a part of the capital. And you? Try to touch your finger!
So what? Do you transfer money through a bank cell or immediately by tax?

YYYY :
Of course I do not trust you. You even have a reputation below zero.

[ + 36 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №145785
 22.10.2017
When I was just over 20, I had to live in the raion, the apartment in the panel was removed. One cold winter morning I went out early to warm up the car and clean the snow. Morning, winter, cold, frost -10-15 A couple of such drunk-blind local residents go by, he and she, both aged 50-60, already drunk (7 am! ) is Both swimming, she has blue eyes on both. They argue, they don’t share. At some point, a man knocks his grandmother in the ear. She falls on her back and no longer moves... The man quietly leaves.

I stand, what do I do? I don’t want to get in touch with this drunk. But the grandmother lies on the snow, does not move, maybe the pebble has thrown away, and if not, it will freeze.

I approach her, I look at her eyes as if opened, lying in the sky looking. I say :

A woman, a woman! How about self-esteem?

Continuing to lie, she focuses on me with a dim look, looks at me, then barely stands up and answers, shaking:

I do not meet in the street. - and while I was shaking from such a turn, he adds: - You are still green, it may be hard to believe, but I am long over thirty!

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №145784
 22.10.2017
On the door of the hairdresser beautifully printed in the print:
"Friendly Hair Care"
Where are they going? In which cities?

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №145783
 22.10.2017
In general, it was very romantic with the writing mole, when I came late at night from work (and I lived almost there then), went to the kitchen, opened the refrigerator and the mole broke and flew into the refrigerator. They moved like goats to the south. They spotted inside. I closed the door and decided that I would eat in the morning at work.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №145782
 22.10.2017
XHH: to this:
In Musk everything is transformed. Our cat Smok, according to the same scheme, lived all his life with Musya.

There was a cat first called Pi. The child taught geometry when he called. Then she became Piu-Piu. When the cat moved to me, they were transformed into Pisha (Pisha, because in French it is a cat). Then somehow insensitively the cat began to wear the proud name Pishkenzon.

But this story does not end. When the cat once again moved, it was settled with a rabbit, from some mega-guides Maine Coon by the default name Jules Verne (in that spell all the cats were given the names of writers). A few months later, Jules Verne became Jules. And you say: Jewish lobbying in government and business...

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №145781
 22.10.2017
Yesterday, a neighbor came in to save me for tea. And I have two greenfield boxes in bags with a flavor. I asked her which she liked more, with strawberries or ordinary. And I hear in response the thoughtful: "Governed with strawberries".
Here I had tea from the lips and broke up. The jaw fell.
I have not even heard of the goof.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №145780
 22.10.2017
I drank a bottle of wine in a haru yesterday. We cooked meals with her, painted my greys, trained in vocals and went to bed.
Are you ready to meet a beautiful old man for today?
I don’t mean myself, I mean an antique salon 😉

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №145779
 22.10.2017
I don’t know what to do with N.
YYY: What’s wrong with him?
He is a good expert... in his field.
But look at his results in a month. Can we send him back to that area?

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №145778
 22.10.2017
To the question "Who will you go to study?" the young gift boldly replied: Ornithologist-traumopedist... The profession is rare, and in demand, probably. Students are undoubtedly talented.

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