bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 37 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №73284
 22.11.2012
I decided to take a break from pasta with peelings and prepare soup. He cooked and safely drained the water.

I thought...

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №73283
 22.11.2012
[0:12:05] Jaroslav: "I am a machine. I do not want to go anywhere. I want to sit in a crib and do a crib.

[ + 53 - ] Comment quote №73282
 22.11.2012
Two friends in the morning after drinking:
How are you and your wife?
She sent me in the ass.
I am in p... du.
We will be neighbors.

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №73281
 22.11.2012
If you suddenly, earlier than usual, came home and heard from the threshold that your wife is strangely standing, you are an irreparable optimist if you think it was her broken hand.

[ + 31 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №73280
 22.11.2012
I lie with my wife and talk.

I am. You are my dearest.
by J. A thousand and a half! (Summa "ransom purchase" at the wedding)
I am. A lot for 5 kg of chicken.

I get rid of cats, cats and other things.

[ + 32 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №73279
 22.11.2012
Review of the film "The Dark Knight"

Wowowuhhhh..., purely accidentally watched the "return of the legend", stuck!!! I watched the first two films and was just surprised. I love this trilogy and look forward to the continuation!!! to

Woman, what continuation do you expect from the trilogy after watching all three films?

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №73278
 22.11.2012
A: I would like to get a ballistic missile with IP guidance.
l: gigs, from factory targeted at 127.0.0.1

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №73277
 22.11.2012
xxh: Still it was cruel - to show him "Sinister", and then to restore the film on the disk four times through the remote when he was trying to delete it))

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №73276
 22.11.2012
Previously, people in very emotional moments liked to use the word "Remove!".
But it was too long for such moments and was shortened to a simple interdomain "OH!". The interdomention "Ah!" also appeared, but there was another word.

[ + 22 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №73275
 22.11.2012
The teacher teaches what he knows; the teacher teaches what is prescribed by the Ministry of Education.

[ + 59 - ] [25 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №73274
 22.11.2012
The servant told me.
Read a story to the child:
It is written on the stone, "You go to the left - you will lose the horse and you will be happy. Go to the right - you will die, and the horse will be happy you will go straight - you will both be whole, but unhappy" asks the child - where would you go? Only the unspoiled childhood thought could give rise to such a natural response. The horse is sorry, let it live. I would leave the horse at the stone, and I would go to the left.
How do you explain to a child why in a fairy tale this shit went to the left with a horse?

Bahruz

[ + 118 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №73273
 22.11.2012
As my grandmother once said, it’s better to shoot, recharge and shoot again than to light a light and ask, “Who’s here?”

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №73272
 22.11.2012
I had a headache this morning.
because yesterday I decided to serve myself with a spilly Cuban "shardone"
Gone to Zizou

xxx: and, boiled with the juice of grapes, crushed by the feet of the Cuban virgins, invited the lazy to go with me to the Prague.

You know, she agreed.

Not surprisingly

I think I’ll do it now.

xxx: here's how to explain to a person that he in a month 25, and he has not yet understood that the crawl leads to a fallout, and did not understand the main rule "drink - turn off the internet"


[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №73271
 22.11.2012
Why did I love the rain? I didn’t have a telescope.

[ + 28 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №73270
 22.11.2012
Vitaliy70: I sometimes think fortunate that the crucifixion could have been hanged or not brought to the chariot to plant would not be crucifixion and the hell knows what...

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №73269
 22.11.2012
Good for the Kazakhs - they have two space exits - Baikonur and Chui Valley!

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №73268
 22.11.2012
From the discussion of the Curiosity discovery on the Habrah:
The Internet spreads rumors about the upcoming "big news" from NASA rover Curiosity, but the space agency continues to keep silence about the details.

X: I dump a package of Belomora, 2 bottles from under the “Stoolish”, and a little further away – fragments of the newspaper “Pravda”, which cover some organic substance.
V: Broken cabbage and pot with petunia?

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №73267
 22.11.2012
The end of the world (
Well, until the end of the week and it’s fine.)

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №73266
 22.11.2012
He reached the point that when reading the list of U.S. universities, he tried to read Oxford as a sixteen-digit number.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna