<xxx> in Japan after the earthquake the roads are better than in Russia

LOL) daughter (3,5 years old) today tough sister loaded)
She (sister) wanted to make a ring in her nose, told a little how cool it was, but asked only one question, after which the sister fell into a stumbling:
How are you going to get in your nose?
PS: my sister answered))

I stopped singing in the shower when I heard my neighbors sing to me.

My favorite :*
I just found your rubber glued to the top shelf of my desk.
My favorite :*
Should you leave it or throw it away?

Dimon ‎(13:25):
Is the end of the world more likely?
LISander ‎(13:25):
I beg you.
This is Libya!
They didn’t even have the imagination to come up with a second color for the flag.

You know, how we (in Ukraine) translated the title of the film "Alien Paul"? "The Revenant of Paul"! Fuck, I am crying.

I always thought that blonde stupidity was a stereotype.
The phrase:
Would you be upset if we didn’t meet six years ago?and "

I apologize to all the programmers who have fallen into the endless cycle.

I am in xxx)
Your sexual relationships don’t interest me.

What will we call our children?and :)
Depending on who is born.
Q: Who do you want more?
YYY: The Cat

If God wanted to make man circumcised, He would have created.

Death threat
In the restaurant of the House of the Actor one night at midnight there was a terrible fight: against a dozen overtaken everyday people stood... one person. But this man was the world champion, the great Soviet boxer of the 1960s Valery.
by Popenchenko. Therefore, the attackers flew away from him with a wind like kegls. And suddenly from a distant table arose the artist of the Taganka Theatre Ramses
Jabralov is thin, small, completely defenseless. Actually
Ramses was not going to take part in the fight: he just wanted to stop somehow these screams, poisoning him the legitimate three hundred grams after the show.
He hardly raised the healthy floor vase that stood in the corner and broke it on Popenchenko's head. He collapsed, like a choked, and the police who had just arrived carefully brought the ring master out of the square.
The next evening, an unusual tense atmosphere reigned in the restaurant: everyone was waiting for a breakdown. And indeed, around midnight he entered the hall.
Popenchenko with a shaken head. He looked around, found who he was looking for, and headed to the distant table.
Ramses stood up to meet him in all his almost childhood, stumbled with sad, black eyes in the champion's nose and in complete silence clearly said:
Next time I’ll kill her!
Popenchenko, from surprise, wandered, embraced Ramzes with his famous colouches, splashed onto the neighboring chair... and made friends with him until the end of his short life.

Money ruins people – so we are mostly good people.

I didn’t want to wish you a good morning today.
He is: Why?
I dreamed you changed me. Two times!

At work we move to the use of licensed software.
When attempting to download a Windows 7 update, Internet Explorer declares that it does not trust the Microsoft node and blocks the downloading of files. I don’t trust him either, but frankly.

I had to raise my husband at 6.30.
The alarm ringed, “Sasha, wake up!”
The second time: go, Sasha, get up!
Third time: it’s time, let’s go, it’s time to go! It is half eighth!
And at that moment I realized that my husband had left for a long time, and I shake my two-year-old son so he would get up to go to the airport.

The child’s logic:
A little 5 years old approached my mother with a clean disc that took from a pack on my desk and asked for a marker.
He wrote Shrek 5 with a mark on the disc and brought it to his mother: “Let’s look.
Mother: He will not work.
Small: - Strangely, I saw my dad write the title on the discs and then we looked at them right away.

"Because of budget cuts, they combined mathematics with physical education" (c) Simpsons. I guess I know what Fursenko’s favorite animated series is.)

A sweater is such a warm wool clothes that a child wears when his mother is cold.

Commentary on Navalny's post:
"Alexey, please correct the shit on the country. It is offensive."

No, well, I am surprised... For comparison: you read a fairy tale, you want a unicorn with all your soul. I found. And after some time: and the horn is short, and the pearl does not shine, and swings while riding, and the color could be lighter, and magical dust for 100 km spends a lot... And in general, Why is he not a Pegasus??????? to