bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №80652
 23.04.2013
I am an artist. Let me steal and chew.
Hm...
It is paint and paint.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №80651
 23.04.2013
I’m tired of these stupid cats. I want something smarter and more devoted. To wait for me at the threshold, it did not interfere under my feet. To be able to go for a walk with him. He and I understand each other in half a word.
In general, a more intelligent and perfect animal.
For example, the medusa.

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №80650
 23.04.2013
The body decoction of the dead bird of the chicken squad stands in a cooled brother’s grave, next to the fish mummies.
xxx: so eat anything, only on the way home to acquire fat deposits Sus scrofa
domestically murdered by force.
WOW: Oh about what?! to
Buy the brake!
Why not say so?
Hopefully I’ll make you a vegetarian ?
You will make me such a rabbit.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №80649
 23.04.2013
There was a man with a gasoline on the street. I suggested to buy one. I picked up words for refusal.
After a lot of thinking about the topic of active sales and the correct positioning of the product.

[ + 32 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №80648
 23.04.2013
One day, as a hungry student, I was stuck on vacation in a shelter, alone in a block.
There was no money, food too. In a neighbor-foreigner on the window she found a bowl: stylized under a bowl of honey, inside something looks like honey, smells like honey... this is only a very thick one, barely forged with a spoonful. The taste is sweet. And the inscriptions, most importantly, in a foreign language.
In short, I grabbed something.
And when the neighbor came from the holidays, I quietly watched her search the room, quarrelling: where did this hair removal tool go?! to
I have not eaten honey since then.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №80647
 23.04.2013
xxx:you know, the fairy tale of martyško and glasses can now be called colleagues and mfu

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №80646
 23.04.2013
Apparently feeding grandchildren is something on the level of human nature - at 18 years want to eat, at 30 want money, and at 50 want to feed the grandson to death.

[ + 34 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №80645
 23.04.2013
** Missed evening call to Admin from Marina**
The morning SMS:

admin
Hi to you! At night, the call is automatically turned off on my phone.

Marina is
I was asked to pay 1000r.

admin
The pipet. I sympathize. Does it make sense to buy a new one?

Marina is
What new

admin
Nothing, everything is old. How by herself?

Marina is
I did not argue with the guy.

admin
Don’t worry, everything will be fine!

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №80644
 23.04.2013
News on the website of the Rock-Thematics store:
A wallet was found in the store. We ask you to come and take it, or we will drink it all!

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №80643
 23.04.2013
Interview with a dean of a technical university:
Deputy Dean: I can’t talk to the student xxx.
Assistant Dean: Why?
Deputy Dean: he says he did not have time to close the session, because
He helped one group to close debts, after which he stood up and left.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №80642
 23.04.2013
XXX: Who is better?
Dalton or Dalton?
YYY: O_O

[ + 35 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №80641
 23.04.2013
Q: How is the mood?
UUU: Yeah fuck...I’m going to the bar.The child says to his mom-mama, look at Ozzy Osbourne!And he ticks his finger at me. It is to rejoice that the child knows who he is, or to cry that I am like him.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №80640
 23.04.2013
From a romantic conversation with my husband under the impression of the series about the eastern labyrinth:

XX: You just don’t understand anything. I dance the oriental dance, and you, my sultan, throw me a purple t-shirt. We will have an unforgettable night.
UUU: Dear, it’s all really cool, of course, but there’s one BUT in your plan. I don’t have a violet coat.
But there is a socket.
So Dobby, you are free.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №80639
 23.04.2013
The most important thing in the house!! Everything else is shit!!! to
WOW: Did you not understand? This for what?
There are I and Thy! And everything in the house is easy to ruin with the help of a cottage!! to

[ + 38 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №80638
 23.04.2013
Artem Albertovich: I am a devil and so on. And all why? I went to the gas station (in her car, I was driving). The hour of night. I stood in the box, filled with supplies – viscarmartinipivo. Here the hooker comes in. Take 0.3 and a cake. People look at him with interest. I take it, and lick it: is it so modest? He is: What? I: Oh yeah, you’ve just started the change. There was no penalty for the big dog and the walking dog...I didn’t think that this dog would be guarding the road from the park hotel in the morning. I take a beetle with me. Good morning and the words: Good morning! And the car with the hood-dog, I will not forget for a long time.

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №80637
 23.04.2013
On our floor there is a computer company that occupies several offices.
Today I went out into the corridor, and several men jumped out of these offices at the same time.
They began to scream and find out why the network fell.
Well, I went on.
Two hours later, she walked through the corridor again, and the sound of a loud drum was heard, right in four hands!
I did not raise it)

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №80636
 23.04.2013
I think I found you a couple.)
I am surprised
A man with a higher education and a positive attitude is urgently looking for an attractive, not inclined to completeness girl with material and housing problems to move to my territory for the purpose of living together, drinking coffee in the morning (tea, juice), collective television viewing, discussing foreign and domestic policy problems, joint financial and economic activities in accordance with existing legislation, self-defense in case of invasion of aliens or hostile suppositories, intimate fun (with mutual sympathy) and many other things that we will be able to come up with.
Tagged: ml

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №80635
 23.04.2013
What one man does, you call a crime; what many people do, you call a government.

Robert Shelley, “Exchange of Minds”

Leo Bonart

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №80634
 23.04.2013
lx> without a certain amount of precious metal to the goal will not be possible.
2> without gold
lx> that you, the crush, are not at all. I’m not talking about the despised metal in the wallet, but about the noble steel, namely the shale in the ass.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №80633
 23.04.2013
SMS with a girl:
I bought a nice jacket.
YYY: I just have to see.
XXX: The Blue
YYY: What did you get? I write without mistake.
The blue jacket!
XXX: But you, go on, too

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