bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №100881
 23.07.2014
I once ordered a dress.
I ate a sandwich with ivory.
I didn’t go in and then cried.
covered

[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №100880
 23.07.2014
I am a hero from advertisers: there is a rumor about the company of ros-shotots. Your contributions and pensions are our stability!
Are they not burning at all?

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №100879
 23.07.2014
I will try to describe in one example how I try to make a contract with some clients.
Imagine I sell a car for $20,000. Here is a call to me interested:
Do you sell a car for $20,000?
Do you have a real interest?
- Of course, I think I will take, why not, we just consulted with the family and decided that we would pay 3 thousand. dollars, and not immediately, and if we do not want to, we will not pay, but you, of course, must understand it yourself.
- You know, I don't even know what to answer, I can only drop a thousand. Dollars, but calculate immediately
“Hmm... You’re strange, I don’t understand how you’re going to sell the car?”? to


[ + 35 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №100878
 23.07.2014
I have never been so uncomfortable in my life.
This is Xerry. This is uncomfortable when at a peak hour in the subway the back presses you to a girl in a light shaft and you feel her back measurably lifting elastic chest, you feel all the pleasant curves and patches of her lower body, and her breath gently tickens your ear.
What is it? what is it? what is it?
- The problem is that your x@i begins to get up and at the same time he begins to rely on the same%pu in front of the man standing and pressed to you.
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
It is about. The man probably thought so too... That’s uncomfortable.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №100877
 23.07.2014
Predators and herbivores, go out of the resource! This is "The Call of the Jungle".

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №100876
 23.07.2014
Oh, I learned here that there is a pink lake in Australia (link), I want to go there.
I think only vanilla TPs are allowed there.
XHH: Who is Who?
Hm...when do I go out?

[ + 19 - ] Comment quote №100875
 23.07.2014
Anna Wanna, our team
I want to see pigs.

Keep quiet, kids, don’t let go!
Just look in the mirror.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №100874
 23.07.2014
At the present time, it seems that anything can be reduced to shamelessness, even how to patch KDE under FreeBSD. Whoever does not patch is a moscal.

[ + 23 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №100873
 23.07.2014
Not lucky I: They (police) who invented the law astute, they report the address and the name of the applicant.The neighbor called at night, the alkashi under the window spoke.The alkashi came and took, after an hour they threw her stones in the window, knocked on the door, did not sleep until the morning.The next day at the twelfth hour of the night the local declared by the cable of the statement and again until the hour of the night the writer went.Beyond the alkashi window the song is pressed, he hears and writes.
@: Thus it will reduce not only the number of crimes, but also the number of claims. Prevention is like that.)

[ + 34 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №100872
 23.07.2014
Why, if the guy, who spawned the spectrum at 7 years old, had an offgenic and wealthy father he now puts in the merit of himself, say that he spawned? He was given a sleep, he was sleeping, he was lucky with his parents.
I didn’t have a father, I didn’t drink at all. And not until the components were, to eat would be found.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №100871
 23.07.2014
I watched the movie "The Edge of the Future". The screenwriter appears to have won a "drunken" dispute over whether he will be able to mix "Star Landing" and "Surka's Day" in one film. Not bad, with a win, author!

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №100870
 23.07.2014
by C HABRA:
The cat, when there is nothing to do, lies the eggs. Our lawmakers - shooters translate.
Morality: all the problems are because a person's spine does not move properly.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №100869
 23.07.2014
You have borrowed!
Let him be better in clean socks and sandals than looking at yellow uncut nails.

With love, girl

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №100868
 23.07.2014
HH: I thought here...
xxx: by the number of nipples in a mammal you can find out the maximum number of children carried at the same time, set by the developer xD
How do you explain the triangle? x )
Tagged: bag
WOW :D

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №100867
 23.07.2014
The clever wife put the bed in the middle of the room, away from the walls, and now the husband does not know where to turn after sex.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №100866
 23.07.2014
...
In general, the task is to make a link to time on the photo. The newspaper is gone.
and elementary. You go into any row, arrange a debush there, you are photographed, and the date will be placed, and arranged as appropriate. You do not dig. You can not even walk, there is a mobile service.
No, they can get a mouthpiece.
What does "can" mean? They must be filled! Carefully but strongly.
Well done, without any injury.
This is for gauges.
- qwertv, that you are an opera does not mean that everything should revolve around your work.
That is why?! to
And here my arguments ended.

[ + 17 - ] Comment quote №100865
 23.07.2014
XHH: We have to tie up with the compass. I go home today from change. And behind the window of the bus is the beauty - the sun is slightly baked, green, birds sing. I turned to the sun and covered my eyes so that under the eyelids there would be such a yellow light. Well... it was until the bus went into the shadow.

Oh, say, what would you think if it suddenly became cold, quiet, and before your eyes appeared something shining, monotonous, blue?

What is BSOD? Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh 😉

HH: It is funny to you. I just had a heart attack :(

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №100864
 23.07.2014
Blur is a good band, they have one good song.
I thought, two...

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №100863
 23.07.2014
to this
Probably in the life of every person comes a moment when you want to take hostages and demand a helicopter, 2 million dollars and a bottle of light beer.
and two.
Better than two"

My friend now serves in the Special Forces. They had exercises. They played for terrorists and, according to the script, took hostages in a local hospital. As a requirement he put forward "bring me coffee and sweets", and when he was refused to build his hysteria and began to swing the chairs. In the script it wasn’t and all oh%eely...but the coffee brought)))

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №100862
 23.07.2014
Originally, this site was a quotation of the runnet. And the quotes were not necessarily about it. They must have been funny.
Your K.O.

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna