<Nastena> friends, I sometimes formulate phrases not clearly because I try to joke

xxx: I have recently seen an increase in the popularity of the words CYKA BLYAT among foreigners.
This is CS:GO’s fault.
Zzzz: Poles are to blame for everything

- Who will explain to me why the +12 icon is on the math book?
Is there a number 69?
Probably...
So you understood?

Head of intelligence AMAN: “Hezbollah does not want war, but there may be coincidences.”

In the fact that men believe the "unnecessity" of makeup, costumes and other features, of course, the women themselves are to blame. Because if a man was struck by a woman's beauty, but he did not remember what she was dressed in - it means that she was dressed perfectly (if attention was paid to the costume itself, it means that he was dressed or inappropriate), and with cosmetics - knows how to paint (and spends a little time and effort on this) the woman who eventually hears how she is beautiful without cosmetics, and with cosmetics it is in the association of men nuclear-slip eyelids and a tonal that is peeled with cloves of an unskilled eight-grade girl. Here are men and women who do not need such a naphyg - because the beautiful women in their eyes are of the type "without cosmetics"ofgenic))))

It is like cinema. If the plot is captured, and the characters give out sticky characters, then no one will pay attention to the quality of special effects or the antagonist's ears. And when they are dramatically stuck for nothing - they cling to every piece of stuff.

In a trolleybus, an elderly woman told her friend:
- In the clinic reworked the card, they wrote a diagnosis: a pensioner.

I played hiding with my son. He is hiding, I am looking. I hear the noise in the kitchen, I think, clearly, the drunkard is sitting under the table, beating his head. Another 5 minutes watched the TV and here comes the wife from work, goes to the kitchen, opens the refrigerator, and there the little one in the refrigerator sits blue but happy!

Repairs in the toilet:
XX: I generally wanted to cover the walls with mirror panels. Imagine you are sitting, and around you a thousand shitters go to infinity :-D
The only thing that can be missed by drunkenness is the walls :D
HH: It’s not so lonely.

Do you watch the news?

and no. I seem to have missed the first two seasons and now I don’t understand anything.

A friend of the German botanist K. Goebbels - an artist - once invited a scientist to his workshop to show his new painting "The Fall of Sins". Goebbels considered the painting for a long time, but when the praise-seeking artist asked what his opinion he suddenly burned out: "The apple is drawn wrong! How so wrong? The painter was surprised. Why Why? And because the variety of apple that stretches Eve to Adam was raised only eighty years ago!

I have a boyfriend from Russia. I am pleased with the Belarusian language. They laugh at the metrics. As a child, he always dreamed of writing with ы, and this is the rule! Daveche stumbled from the description of the colibri on the Belarusian Wikipedia. Here I think, how to please him: to tell that jokes in Belarusian are not blasphemy, but GEST. And the roofing machine sounds like STRAHAR-BLAHAR.Or just bring the furniture into the salon with the sound name FABLE.

The husband at work was given darts, brought home, hanged on the door, the small died of jealousy.
I urgently had to buy a children's version with balls on the lipstick.
They hang on one door under one another.
Now I am afraid to go to the men in the room: either a drill in the forehead or a ball in the crowd.

Worked at the substation. In the winter, while there was no major work, one worker decided to cook a straw in the yard in front of the house. It is full of metal, why not hide. Looking at this case, the second, third joined. There are already five or six full-fledged playgrounds in front of the houses. And here I go somehow home, a grandmother brakes me, from the adjacent shops. I said, I have already filed a complaint to the appropriate instances, why the car was not placed in front of our house, the substation is a harmful enterprise - there are all kinds of radiation, even the reactor stands (she heard from Claudia). And Putin issued a law for workers of harmful enterprises to decorate polluted settlements. And we got the entire substation on the hat from the administration. Carrots are now being picked up at the landfill. The initiative is a good thing, do you know, Baba Vera?

The older is 8 years old, the younger is 2. If she is hit somewhere in the house and cries, the elderly man usually cries slightly around the place and says, “All, I killed him!“”

It works inexorably, I must say.

We go for a walk on a hill. One of the boys struck her accidentally. She turns to the elderly and calmly-ice tone, pointing her finger straight to the offender: - Tal, kill him!

And all the grandmothers froze with their mouths open.

Even the smartest programmers with gigabytes are helpless against the idiots with bits.

About man

My partner once travelled for charity to a children’s home in the Ivanov region. The year 94, a full trendsetter in this region. This monastery was in the ass, so on the way back he went to the village, went to the local store for a mineral. A couple of people in line stood up. Here the guy comes in. Years of 15. A poor donelja, exhausted, but a look... really, the "Afghans" and "Chechens" who came to a partner for work are not often found. Two men standing in front of the partner depart, offering the guy to go to the box office. The saleswoman asks, “Ivan Sergeevich, what do you want?”
The boy takes bread, milk, pasta, pays, thanks and leaves. The partner waits for his turn (there is no one behind him), and after the purchase asks the seller, "Sorry, who is this? Just like a young boy, and you are to him by name-fatherhood."
“This is not a boy. This is a man. He was 14 years old, 2 years ago, his father was struck by some muddy alkas on the crossing and so left - not found. Is that little now? He has two sisters who do not go to school, and a younger brother. So he has little time to study in school - money equally in men's earns, sorting cleaners, for any work is taken - not what our alkashi, their mother... And 3 months ago the daughter of alkashi - neighbors pulled out of the fire, not afraid to use in the fire.
So that’s not Vanka – a student, and Ivan Sergeevich is here, that’s the way!”

P.S As the partner told, as much as on the way home, he did not think about life in those years for many years.

The boy meets the parents of the future bride.
The Father suggests:
Will you have something to drink?
I do not drink.
You will get bored with Anita.

I had a Persian who fell into ecstasy from the canned corn Doshi :ROFL:, could condemn the bowl :-) And the poppy (which Jaco), until shake in sight of cooked shrimp. Oral:"Give, give, give... what a pity, right?Crazy: and if I got, I cleaned it for a long time, and then I ate it.

Of all my male acquaintances, in the last five years, NO ONE has been gifted for 23 soap and underwear gifts, but they are writing about it on the Internet.
Men, have you admitted that you are so nostalgic? Yes is?

To this "the whole essence of Russian tourism..." in the Baikal when you say at the reception at registration - Hi! The managers jump from joy with the words - finally the Russian language!
There are very few tourists from Russia, but there are plenty of Chinese, Koreans and Germans - and they are very excited! Especially the Germans :) and many Germans do not just come there, but come in cars (by the way, despite the stereotypes - the road to the Baikal is generally good - some places are even very good, there are, of course, broken areas, but mostly these are places where repair or expansion).
And the level of service, by the way, is very good regardless of the price category, and the water is really uncomfortable!