bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №136268
 25.11.2016
Designers in the United States refuse to sew dresses for Trump’s wife. One refused and called on colleagues to do the same. One came up.
You won’t like those Americans ?
The idiots)
I mean, they are all so politized.)
XHH: Something tells me that this one is a visitor
The Chinese had to go, they would have made her such a dress muddy overnight, it would later be transformed into a coat-bar with a refrigerator and heater.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №136267
 25.11.2016
XXX: I feel like I have grown up. Previously my parents called me and said, “Look, what kind of candy we bought!” And now they say, look what we bought vodka!

[ + 27 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №136266
 25.11.2016
There is a legend that if a vampire bites a person, he will also become a vampire. brought a cat. So this drawing bites me and now I always want to sleep after work.

[ + 24 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №136265
 25.11.2016
Nico_S> I turn into a lion in the winter
Mary_not_hair> oh mystery... and how?
Nico_S> I want to sleep 20 hours a day and get someone to eat

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №136264
 25.11.2016
Warrek Minosh: Heard today a funny dialogue of a boy and a girl (P - lives in Moscow, D - in the suburbs in his house)
(P): "Actively agitates and calls (D) in guests"
(D): "States" - You said at the Tarakan house, I will not go anywhere.
(P): "It is not lost" – and you have mice!
(D): Mice are more sympathetic and fun when you hit them.
P: What is it? O_O
D: What is it? and :)

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №136263
 25.11.2016
The provincial city. The Winter. I am a fifth grade student in the second shift. At 5 a.m. after class, it is dark as at night. When I returned home one day after class, when I walked out of the school gate, I was shouted:

You hear little! I turned around - in front of me stood a big guy without a hat in a tightly stretched shovel.

Are you smoking? He continued.

I noticed under his eye a "lamp" while he barely stood on his feet and smelled a stink. He pulls his cloth with broken goats to squeeze my hand.

Do you have a strain? He asks me. I don’t quite understand what this is, I answered no at all.

My name is Leha Lobov, I am a pyjama of men. I betrayed that strange guy. I stood in full shock and didn’t know what to answer.

If you need someone to find me, I will fight for you. After these words, the drunken Leha walked a wandering walk on a dark street. I never saw him again. I have never used the services of the ghost.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №136262
 25.11.2016
xx: I wonder, but what do the lines of the witch code look like if the developers are Poles? A whisper?
yy: Polish written very easy to understand
ZZ : Aha you see //kurwa - meaning a complex section of the code

[ + 30 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №136261
 25.11.2016
The employer’s logic:

1) Recruit the most talented and smart employees.

2) To deceive them by ZP, because “they are fools”

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №136260
 25.11.2016
I decided to take a ride to play in a Euro Truck like. I think it's new, I'm looking for an airplane cheaper, I find, I agree. The case was in St. Petersburg.

I come, a very ordinary house, which must have seen the king. Apartment three.

Oh yes, this is me, come in.

I go to the entrance, that is, to the parade. I look at the door open on the first floor, I think they meet, just don’t know which side is the third.

I crash into the apartment, I hear someone roar, I walk further into the rooms - a company is sitting, a person 5. They smoke, they drink beer. Everyone looks at me with a question.

Hi, I am driving.

and pause.

Come and park, Hole.

And the roast is such, clearly smoked.

It turns out that it happens in Peter, apartments from above start by accounting.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №136259
 25.11.2016
I have lived alone since recently, always lacking money, I eat very modestly. I recently met my father in a store. I have quite a little in the cart and everything "on the list", and he started picking up different tastes, meat, sausage. When they passed the box, paying each his own, he takes his bags and says, "It's for you!" I never thought the best gift was food. I look forward to the time when I can help them myself.

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №136258
 25.11.2016
Oak E1
Muza Nikolaevna: I found a child's Ekarta on the name of a boy...I will be pleased to give it.
Almonds: in the social networks look for him or his parents I so Eckart returned)
Mosa Nikolaevna: In social networks mother could not be found
D.Golovin: Lick all the photos of Daddy, Mom will come out on you

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №136257
 25.11.2016
The world was captured and divided equally by the Yojis and the homophobes. Another explanation for what "sensation" was blown out of the fact that the footballer on the pitch was struck with a "pydoras", and he was able to parish this badly, is simply not.

[ + 22 - ] Comment quote №136256
 25.11.2016
Command: Order budget cameras with POE and flash card.
Admin: from the length the cheapest 12k.
Headquarters is expensive.
Admin: China nomade 5k
Pocher, just to work.
Admin: Poker for 12k or 5k?
Director: We will think about it.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №136255
 25.11.2016
She called a taxi, a 50-year-old man arrived, the face was immediately visible "not in a mood". I was driving to the office center, before it there was no public transportation.

Dialogue with the taxi driver:

Do you work there?

I work...

It was hard to get there on foot, so you had to call a taxi.

- °°°

They continued in silence...

[ + 25 - ] Comment quote №136254
 25.11.2016
Previously :
To live for one salary.
Now is :
To live until your retirement.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №136253
 25.11.2016
X: Go to the cinema
A: What is what?
X: The "Style"
You can also see them on the bus.
X: I want to be fantastic
U: then "House-2"

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №136252
 25.11.2016
The Parents:
Andrews
Buy seeds (1 kg) and tomatoes. 4-5) in the pavilion, which is on the corner of Volgograd and Amunsena. No food to feed.
The xxx:
OK is
Tomatoes are blue, of course.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №136251
 25.11.2016
Canakau: The Planet of the Apes?
Every morning in the metro.

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №136250
 25.11.2016
Minerals mining on asteroids
Waldliebhaber: Em, how are you going to brake 500 tons in the atmosphere?! to
Shkslj: Until a characteristic crust.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №136249
 25.11.2016
"My tutor doesn't get in touch - is it a technical problem or a content problem?"
The content problem, Karl!
xxxh: I’m trying here to understand what should be with the content so that the podcast is like "Now Naher!" and doesn’t get in touch.

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