bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №139144
 26.02.2017
There are two reasons why I don’t give money to the homeless:

1st They need money for alcohol.

2nd I need money for alcohol.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №139143
 26.02.2017
Kapral: I had a friend, a fan of tuning and forcing engines. Now he has a service for repair, tuning and "charge" off-road vehicles for competitions. And once he was all "drunk" over Zaporozhye motorcycles. Available and not unfortunate.
The motorcycles, of course, were not serial. And heated up! So there was another tank for 40 liters of water in the car, and a spraying pump on each boiler. When overheating, the "cold shower" was turned on.
Then some men went fishing.
On the way "there," in the shit, he bustled, then into the village for food on the same roads... the water ended, and at the rise in front of the village the motor had to be stunned, the shob did not slip from overheating. But he crossed the hill, and slightly pushing it down to the village, to the nearest well. there poured water, and while the car was poured, it cooled. Sitting down, hanging up and going. And he almost stumbled at the pillar, losing control, for he was roaring at the evil one, seeing in the mirror the rows of men from the bench opposite the well.
From their point of view - "I swallowed the constipation! the man pushed by hand! I drove to the well, poured a couple of waters in the tank - and left!and "
This is how the legends of Russian cars are born, capable of fucking driving.

[ + 39 - ] Comment quote №139142
 26.02.2017
alexdeg: I watch the stitch advertisement of the Beast, the phrase "Every animal dreams of becoming a star" stuck. Home 2 and with them.
555: Not to mention all our show business )))))))

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №139141
 26.02.2017
I don’t know why everyone doesn’t like gay people. Having seen a gay couple on the street, you have to rejoice that they are getting rid of the competition and you will get +2 girls to choose from, or at the same time. All such initiatives must be supported in other people.

[ + 48 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №139140
 26.02.2017
Dear local filmmakers! Hollywood doesn’t ask you anything, just stop answering it.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №139139
 26.02.2017
Panam: Another idiot came here. Type - replace me with transistors that control the ignition coils. Okay, I say 10 pounds. Is it so expensive? If it is expensive, change yourself if you are smart. And I don’t have a spat with a thin grief. See also :lol:
tyrist70: Permanent theme - I would, but there is no solder :-)
I just take a note and write the address.
Please contact us for 150-300 rubles.
Will it really help?
Yes it is 100%!
What office is there?
The store where the stools are sold. and :-)

[ + 18 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №139138
 26.02.2017
At the point!

I don’t know why everyone doesn’t like gay people. Having seen a gay couple on the street, you have to rejoice that they are getting rid of the competition and you will get +2 girls to choose from, or at the same time. All such initiatives must be supported in other people.
— — —
and are often eliminated very competitive - deaf, intelligent, who, in addition, are not lazy to waste time taking care of themselves and the gym.

[ + 45 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №139137
 26.02.2017
> you are a wealthy pervert!!! Give her a live flamingos! They came after her car, strapped by a spiral orchestra! Throw her in a bathroom filled with black maffins.

I am a hopeless housewife - the first thought: fucking, well, how to wash the bath after the blueberry?

[ + 34 - ] Comment quote №139136
 26.02.2017
Scientists have crossed a pig and a man!
Comment: I even know a few of them.

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №139135
 26.02.2017
Opening of the new supermarket:

Girl, where is your wine department?

There is no department yet.

Did you open up at all?! to

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №139134
 26.02.2017
I have a Vietnamese colleague at work. He doesn’t have a very good language, but he always has short comments on the subject. We have been on a break, smoking. Half of them are on their phones. Here’s one colleague to another: Show me how your dog looks? "Very delicious" - is distributed by the Vietnamese.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №139133
 26.02.2017
and Japan
Temples are temples, but the most important thing for me in Nara is the naked deer.In parks, special biscuits are sold to feed deer. If they noticed you with cookies, then you were caught: they will be chasing for a long time, beating, can surround, pull for clothes, and also they, the shit, bite to the bluffs!You knew that their horns are warm? I honestly didn’t know! True, the deer were not very happy when I tried to touch their horns.Even local deer are trained to worship to get cookies. It looks funny, look at the video!

[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №139132
 26.02.2017
Alexander: Vladislav, how law-obedient are you!Do you always observe the PD or do you not violate them just because it hits your pocket?
What’s wrong with PDS? It is natural for intelligent adults.
Reader: Well... Signals from behind will be, unpleasant!

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №139131
 26.02.2017
I saw a meteor today. and beautiful. Brightly green. Do you think you have a wish?
I didn’t have time "Uh you b@i" to think...

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №139130
 26.02.2017
xxx: I once gave a foolish gift to my former carella, so this fool was kind of crazy, eagle, afraid to approach, in the arms as it did not want to. I bite so badly. Then I went away, forever, through the window.

Yyy: Yes, and the hell with her, the main thing is that the bird is fine.

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