XXX: How are you doing sex?
YYY: How about the end of the world?
Xxx :?? to
yyy: The date is all the time shifted and all hope for 2012...())

In China, drunk drivers will be shot.
Here we would be so.

Do you have hot water?
YYYYYYYYYYYY
Yes, but it is cold.
The same shit.

An employee is sitting, eating borst from a glass bank. Dialogue with her:
Are you warming up?
and AGA.
Are you afraid the bank will collapse?
A couple of times it broke, once the bottom collapsed.
- O_O
black_rave

I dreamed I was singing and I invented a poem.
Now I am afraid 😉
“I’m an intergalactic bobber and I’m always upset that I’m a bobber and you’re a bobber, and together we’re EVIL!
It is genius 😉

XXX is fucking
xxx is a businessman. Today in the afternoon, he quickly runs into the apartment, opens the freezer, hides a thick envelope there and runs away.
xxx: well I think money probably big, or documents important, drugs after all
XXX: Opening
And there are two broken chocolates (

U.S. funeral office advertising: Why live if we can bury you for just $39.99

One day a computer technician killed me with a sentence: “All problems with servers are solved by reloading them.”
I am a fool... and it turns out to be as simple!! So I found this shit that reboots the servaque through RESET.

<inwhite> Here my grandmother and grandfather were always friends with neighbors, and I look at my own — fuck them in the mouth better. Not even friends with neighbors.
<sonofadoormat> yes, maybe it’s not about the neighbors, but about you?
<inwhite> No, of course – I’m so upset.

The admin cabinet.
Admin1: [Thinkingly] The data center employee disputes with admin...
Is this the beginning of an anecdote?

A person who is unable to do anything can ruin your life.

The airline
Serega, my childhood friend, today is happy and calm, but there would be no happiness, and the SBU helped...
Sergey does not allow him to "raise the hryvnia", so he had to have a great pleasure of his wife and daughter, to leave the business and come on a sports car to the center of Lviv, just for his pleasure to sit all day in torn jeans, drinking fresh-pressed juices and listening to jazz in a cozy street cafe...
And I am very happy for Sereg, because before he had been a little bandit for many years and so it happened that all his business colleagues, in the best case, sat down.
Even before, my friend had repeatedly been the champion of Ukraine in judo, but this is, as it is said, a completely different one... and I would, with your permission, like to immerse myself in the very old, forgotten history, which Serega reminded me at the meeting.
We studied then in the fourth grade and like all normal boys of the time, dreamed of buying a motorcycle from a moped to build a small airplane and fly on it to America to the Indians (arches, arrows and knives we already had, so we needed only an airplane...) Here we sit with a friend on the roof and pretend – where to get the money for aviation. Serega offered to play cards with the older boys, who throughout the day in the middle of the courtyard on the boxes crumble in the second.
The option is good, but it had two narrow spots: the first is how do we get small pups with a win from healthy men? But the most important question is, how do we win them?
They thought, thought, and decided to make Seregha an extra-sense (although we didn’t know the word at the time...) I took on being his spiritual mentor and teacher.
I spent the whole day kneeling over him, knocking with a stone on a thick sheet of roof iron...and finally, in the evening, Seregha’s third eye was securely opened. Look, I don’t want...
Serega went down from the loft into the courtyard, turned around the cartridges and said unobtrusively:
And I can guess any of your maps on touch...
The Men:
Do not bother the little one, or you will get a leash.
Okay, if I can't guess, I agree with the leech.
The men were interested, pulled the deck and extended the map to Serege.
He carefully took her with two fingers with his shirt, touched her and said:
The treacherous lady.
Oops, take this one.
The six bubbles.
That evening, the cards were no longer played, Serega with your submissive servant and, in conjunction with the spiritual mentor, did the wonders of the extra-sensory.
How worried I was sitting on the ceiling, lumping a magical stone on a iron sheet.
After some time, bringing and printing a new barrel, Serega raised the barrel:
- Let's, if I guess, then you ruble, if not, then me.
The men first hid everything brilliant around, and then offered to close the eyes of the little Nostradamus... it didn’t help and we got money for the plane.
The audience was in shock and not surprisingly, because it is impossible to guess the cards all the time, and even with a cardboard box on the head.
In the courtyard hanged a frightening silence and only somewhere far away, from the loft of the house in the opposite, hardly heard stone strikes on the iron - it was the stumbling of a tired spiritual teacher...
Unseen miracles continued the next day, and the audience increased significantly (even the wives and mothers of some carcasses came), and the rates increased. Now Serega did not descend below the threshold. He always guessed.
The mistake came out only once, when the wizard submitted prison cards, he honestly admitted that he did not understand - where there is a mistake, and where at all what.
For all the time, Serega and I earned about a hundred rubles, fantastic money at the time, everything went great, but the irreparable happened: at the end of the week, my dad took the thirty-fold theodolit back to work and Serega permanently closed his third eye...
Despite the sacred trembling of the fans and the respect of the courtyard boys, he had much, many years ahead.

of Belarus. A man goes on the street. Suddenly he stops and says:
“Here is the shit!”
Two police officers immediately jump to him and drag him into the department.
There they say to him:
You are accused of defaming the president.
I did not defame.
You said shit.
I am talking about the neighbor.
This is not necessary. Everybody knows who our shit is.

taken from forum pickup
-Good evening, dear pickupers =) In general, the problem is next, there is a girl married with whom I have had regular sex for the last 2-3 weeks.
After a week of sex, I noticed that the girl was not ending.
And today I suddenly learn that she is constantly ending with her husband, and the husband himself is also rapidly reaching orgasm.In general, I became very depressed by this news, and I would like to ask you if this is only due to the fact that she has been with her husband for 5 years, and just used to him, and with me does not end because of some psychological problems or because of the fact that she has not yet used to me.
Thanks in advance =)
The answer of a competent sexologist:
Ask your husband how. And run, I answer, run, he runs you, you $&bet, and you’ll just finish.

In the torrent forum:

Danya_2002: Guys, who has the first 10 parts of Friends of Oshen?

She: Well, I went to the store!
Is it for food?
She is : AGA.
A man is a grower of food in the family.
“Oh, you’re going to go to the store with me?
Going shopping is a collection! Collecting is a female activity.

We answer!
I dropped for 2 months to relatives, forgot to remove the password from the computer.Question: how to explain to parents, who remained at home, that the password "Nahui fucked from my computer"?

Say by the letters in the English layout, and there is a chance that they will not burn :)

Who will tell you how websites are made?
Tagged: long
Nadufka: and most often wrong

She: I'm eating, I'm constantly burning the Break light, what do I do?
Take off the towel, yes.
She is fucking...

XX: By the way, do you know that Olegus recently burned off?
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?? to
xxx: briefly, he met a girl (2 years but passed)
XXX was a week of happiness.
XXX: Then Chatta loaded, loaded...
xxx: says, woke up that morning, went to the bathroom, looked at himself in the mirror.
xxx: says, I don't understand how you can meet with such impolite and ugly people like me What you found in me. Maybe you are stupid. I don’t want to meet with fools.
XXX: I took her and drove her out.
XXX: I was in Ahuya when I heard it