My father and mother sold an old apartment and bought a new one. Dad calls and asks to help move things. I was busy after two daily shifts in a row, I answer-Dad, I will now drop you to the card 3000, order loads, I want to sleep, two shifts worked out. I translated, and I slept.

And after some time I learned from common acquaintances that the mother-in-law tells everyone that this is what kind of son, he did not come, bought, this is what relationship to the father.

Bathe called, he rotted, don't bite, she says, all the norms, her children helped to drag, shrink, sweat, and you sent three loaders instead, and she was offended.

I have a friend, Pasha. Such a special companion. A few years ago, he told me how his parents chose his name. We bought a list of names and decided that the list will be read, and what name the child will react to - so they will call it. The baby cried by the name of Pavsekakiy. The parents scratched the tail and decided to call the nearest more decent. He became Paul.

After this story, many things have come to their place. Because he is friendly, although he is recorded by Paul, but he is indeed a Pavseseki. This name is fairly suitable for him.

A long time ago, when Pu was not yet down, but was just beginning his way to fame, I had a relationship with one girl (Masha).

I still rented the apartment then, and the girl already had her own. Purchased by parents. But the girl herself did not sit with her parents on the neck, had a very prestigious job and a good salary at the time.

My job was simpler, but the salary is quite comparable, even a little more. Part of it went to pay the rent. And, in addition, my mother was still alive at the time, but she was already bad and I paid for medicines and a nurse.  However, for life and moderate entertainment was enough.

Masha offered to move to her, her apartment compared to my, rented, was, of course, cooler. I did not move, but I moved a small portion of my stuff.

We lived a few months, had time to come to Peter, Yaroslavl. And I paid for these trips entirely myself, and I also paid for restaurants, movies, excursions and other entertainment. Plus the gifts. I have not been given anything in all this time.)

Masha introduced me to her parents, the impression they made was double: on the one hand - people are very interesting, intelligent, on the other - too pathetic and flattered.

But my negative I left with me and hoped that the impression left no bad. As it turned out, in vain.

I was then the manager of the project, and one day for the project, the client asked us money (we paid a small fix and interest on the project). However, the management swore (and kept the promise) to repay the debt within a maximum of 2 weeks. But at that moment I had, taking into account all my expenses, a small cash gap.

Okay, I think I’ll borrow from Masha, 5 thousand. I have enough for a couple of weeks. The amount at the time was quite solid, but not fatal, the girl's wage was 5 times higher. I sent her a SMS with a request. In a few minutes she called back. I learned a lot of new things about myself.

She was waiting for me to show myself. And I waited. That I flattered a few months, and now I will start to pull money out of it. As for alphons like me, she was warned by her mom and dad. My friends warned. And that fucking me, not her apartment. In general, I would need to gather clothes and drop them at sunset. 

My attempts to explain were ignored. Ok to Ok. I asked early from work, came, I had the keys, quickly picked up everything, left the keys to the neighbors and dropped it as required. The state of affairs was the worst. And in the evening also the SMS from her came: dropped and well, a cowardly bastard, do not want to see, do not hear, arrivederchi.

Less than that, from a few of my friends-friends went calls - what, say, you shocked? It turns out, Masha, by known to her contacts, dissipated her suspicions. True, people who knew me didn’t believe in my career as a beginner Alfonso. But it must have remained (as with the leaves).

I did not take any response - problems were enough: work, mother, etc. About Masha tried to forget, it was bad, the resentment did not want to go anywhere.

It’s been about two months, and suddenly a call from her: We need to meet. I replied that you need it, and I didn’t, I don’t need a new portion of shit. He pushed back and did not answer other calls.  In the evening I come to my rental apartment, sitting on the bench at the entrance. I think I’ll be accused of something else now.

Anne is not. It turns out that it is all the fault of Dad and Mom. For a few months they poured her on the ears, that once I pay for everything, it is extremely suspicious, soon it will end and I will start kneeling the money. Then I ask you to write in the apartment. Later, I will try to remove it. And in general, I showed little admiration and respect for Dad and Mom and their achievements. I don’t like opera and ballet. I have a bad taste, because every cultural person should love them. Moreover, I do not like symphonic music. and etc. and etc.

But now she understood that,, I was not going to either take out the apartment or spit out the money (“maybe” – I was very “enjoyed”). And she brought me 10 thousand, here, take it, if necessary, and let’s try to start again.

I refused to start, advised to listen less to parents and trust myself more. Next time with another friend. In response, Masha stated that in her feelings, I am Alphonse. possibly. In fact, it was Alphonse. After that, it only remained to go to myself, ignoring attempts to enter after me into the apartment. Standing in front of the door for 30 minutes, Masha eventually fell down. Two hours later, the SMS came: You are still Alphonse. Without the “possible”

This is how my Alphonse career began and ended. I spent my money, I didn’t have time to spell out anything, and I didn’t even pull out the apartment. I am a bad careerist.

Shoes are considered Italian only if they are wrapped in your presence by an Italian.

The Curiousness of the Circles of Destiny (almost by Pasternak)

Five years ago I had to fly to Sochi for half a day for a symposium, a lecture to read. While flying, it turned out that there was another event with my performance the next day.
There was laziness to fly here and there, I stayed there and had a free day in Sochi.
Reflecting on the fairy plans of free killing of free time, I remembered that there is a girl living in Sochi from our still student Uffim campaign of the 80s - Angela M-Yang, the real name, the Hussars - to be silent!!A thin low black Armenian, with a slight eastern smoothness of movements and a proud almost nobility profile with a compulsory light nose.
Thirty years without seeing each other.
Two or three phone calls – and here’s her number I have: “Angelina, hello!” – “Aaaaaaaaa!” You are where?? »

I stand in the agreed place, I look around, I wait.
Outside the corner is something black, full, curly!At the same time shouting “Hello! The same one! Where are the cousins? Shake is waiting! Go to us! Where are things? Time to eat! Why one?“!”

She finally allowed her husband to “no feed me for at least half an hour.”

“After the institute, I was assigned to Nagorno-Karabakh, a children’s hospital. Married, husband - a small chief in the council of trade unions of the Republic.
The first child was born, then the second. The house was built, furniture, crystal, carpets.
The war began. We thought we would wait for it to calm down soon, but when at night the turn came through the first floor window and scattered the vases in the servant, we left the beautiful house with all the things and ran with one suitcase to my hometown, near Sukhumi.

My husband went to work, I am again a pediatrician in the clinic. Slowly mastered, the father shared a small piece of land. They built houses, furniture and dishes.

When the first bullet broke the window of the first floor again, I was not even surprised, as if I was expecting something like this.

As a doctor, I could be taken at any time, even from home, even from work and taken to the front. No one even asked me, the pediatrician, if I could do anything. I swapped, changed the clothes. Small wounds under local anesthesia. The fractures broke. Contuitions and diarrhea treated.
Leaving and leaving work were prohibited, strictly monitored, constant control.
We were allowed to carry seriously wounded or sick people to Sochi, accompanied by military patrol.

I found acquaintances there and, hiding under the seat, took out the children one by one, left them there, gave money, as much as it was.
On the next Thursday, she asked the chief doctor to leave for Friday, saying that the strawberries should be cooked for the winter. I left in the office a coat, a replacement shoe, a spare dress, a bag, absolutely all things - on Monday, after all, back to work.
Her husband blinked almost like a mummy, cut off her finger and spotted the spots. I called an ambulance and went to Sochi. We arrived at the hospital, I drove the cockpit with the driver to the reception room, the driver went back to the car, and my husband and I went out through another move and went to the children faster.
Under Sukhumi there was a new house with furniture, all things, even bags could not be taken with you.

I sat in the shadowy courtyard of a modest two-story house in the suburb of Sochi, silently drank the chacha under her cheering about the queues to her in the clinic, about her son and daughter, who have already graduated from institutions and live and work in Moscow, about grandchildren, about common institutional friends - who where and who...

No need of war.

Governors are scared: you stop stealing, they think you’re a murderer.

I walk around the house with my three-year-old grandson from room to room through a double door. Usually one door is open and the other is closed. My grandson overtakes me and opens the second bowl. I ask, “Why did you open it? “” He said, “That you go through. You are so fat.”

Like with love and care...Oh, it’s time to lose weight.