Suddenly it turned out that in America the couriers are also not the elite. I worked in my youth for a couple of months at DHL on a Volkswagen carrier, was very surprised by the attitude of people to their duties. This was my first and last experience working in a large group. Let's say, when one of the first days I said that I delivered all 82 positions by address, my aunt made round eyes, and when I left, called the manager and he then for a long time from me to find out in what rubbish I dropped it all and why fake the signatures of the recipients.

Tells a colleague (K) - the Azerbaijani, then from the first person.



I go in the subway in the morning at the end, in order to forget, through all of Moscow, to bring my fifth point to the place of earning money.

He sat down, clogged his eyes and seemed to be just about to sink into a sweet sleep, as the next station filled up a full car of the people.

I see in this crowd a 70-80-year-old grandmother of a rubber (B). As a well-educated young man, I give her a place:

Sit down grandmother!

The grandmother smiled and with a gentle, affectionate voice said:

B: Not a whirlwind, but a charm!

The neighbor's children, 7-8 years old, went to their place through our. I’ll just hide until we see it. The way they see is shortened. Even the cylinder is not closed behind. I just cut the cut under the bathroom. There are no windows and doors under the roof, only small holes instead. I’m crawling something inside.

The beginning of darkness. I hear them coming. I didn’t see it means I came. Well, I think Hanna for you. Shesh Shuhana, you will walk around this place!

I begin to swim in the dark. They gave a strike! I am even louder! Oh wow wow wow. They run, they run, their name is Mom. I am an AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!! The voice broke, and already with a wild whisper into the whole throat, the ear went on. The soul rejoices! and here...

I wake up, I feel a deadly, frightened wife near me. Speaking with a loud voice, simultaneously with anger, fear and confusion:

and BL@e! That’s what dreaming should be like!! to

My brain crashed and my body fell asleep again.

My friend, Vitaly, found 50 rubles. And we went for a walk, first in the cafe, ice cream with pepsi-cola to eat, took the largest portion, a pound of five for the brother. My aunt, of course, asked where we had such daniches, and Vitalka lied that my uncle came from the north. They ate ice cream as they could, and after an hour they came out of the cafe with the feeling that we could freeze the passing Icarus by breath.

Then we went to the children's world, entered the arms department, bought the largest machine machine, Uncle Terminator would cry out of envy to see our machine guns, with bulbs, one submarine missile could destroy any cat at a distance of ten meters. Then for a long time thought, buy a tank or a game "Driving", bought a tank, the fathers were military. After we went to the bakery, we bought a cake "carton" pieces twenty, "for uncle from the north." And here with a large pack of cakes and armed to the teeth, entered the courtyard. In the courtyard there was a furor waiting for us, only the fool Lenka started screaming to the whole world, "Aunt Sweeta, we found Vitalka, he is here, he is here." Having seen aunt Svet with a belt, I had a vague suspicion that Vitalka had not found the money with everything, and decided to surrender the weapons.

Vitalka turns out to have found the money, lying on a camouflage, at home.

Vitalka was released after three days, for good behavior, he said on "preliminary" came out, as he was punished for a week. But on the bench, the day two did not sit. The author is thorough.

A new employee came to us for a trial period. One day he came with a suitcase. When the backpack was left unattended, the local men threw a tool into it, so that the new extra weight was worn, such as humor. The newcomer noticed nothing and went home with the tool, and in the morning called and said that the job is not suitable for him and he will not come again.

After some time discovered the lack of the tool, the boss gathered everyone and began to ask who saw what. The joke speaks in one voice.

This is a new robbery! We have seen!

Did you see and not stop? So it’s your puddle and you’ll buy a new tool.

“No, you misunderstood,” one of the jokers joked, “we just wanted to joke and threw him the tool, and he had to return it in the morning.

You guys, you are bats! I don’t care, but tomorrow you have to bring the tool!

The jokers began to run to find out the number of the newcomer, his address, tried to contact. I don’t know if they managed to contact or not, but in the end, the jokers bought a new tool.

The most common kind of ghost in white savannah is the ghost of people who died in an attempt to change the carpet. So they wander through the bedrooms in eternal search for corners.

A gift is what a woman can wear, and flowers are a gift for a vase.

the dissemination of uncensored literature by means of the so-called of self. In the words of a friend:

"I remember when they took up the eradication of the Chronicles of current events, then moved along a chain of distributors, arrested one, learned from him to whom he was transmitting literature, arrested the next,... In the end, for two steps along the chain from my parents arrested a man - nothing special. Everyone in the chain split up. No one expected heroism from him. He did not deny taking the chronicles. But he said that the first time he took, looked - some boring shit, he threw out. And then he took them because they were given to him by a girl who he liked, and he wanted to fuck her, so he continued to take and throw away. Eventually the chain broke.”

Did you think the heroes are the ones who strike their fists? Heroism is brains, greed and pofigism :)

If you stick the dead ax to your palm, you can hit your boss with all your strength in the back of the neck and pretend you saved him.