SMS to a friend:
Maxwell: Maybe for me? I will cater to you with an oak and a vine.
Maxwell: By the way, by the way.
Maxwell: It came out in the sense, not in the pitch.
Thanks, I am still passing.

The interreligious council of Russia, which unites the leaders of traditional religions, has advocated the restriction of freedom of speech in order to protect the feelings of believers. 
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Soon the Inquisition will arrive.

France bans children from naming products
Two French couples, who named their newborn daughters Nutella (Nutella) and Fraise (Fraise), were ordered in court to rename the babies.
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It is right. Protection of trade mark. No one has the right to call their products a registered and trademark and suddenly the daughters will grow up and start producing goods under their name. How to judge them then?

C Habr, discussion of one provider:
xxx: I was somehow surprised by the provider too) the guys came together, settled everything, returned, signed the contract and said, "We disconnected your neighbor. There was no free nest, and the contract must be concluded. He will call for support and they will come to change the candle, but don’t give up on us.”))

I immediately remembered the old joke: "Not a single dolphin has not taken a mortgage..."

No dolphin has ever made any grammar mistakes.

A friend says:
I wake up in the morning from an unknown noise. I carefully inspect the room and find the source of the sound: under the table the mouse tries to push the mouth into a bottle with the remains of drinking yogurt and, grabbing the bottle by the throat with the teeth, pulls it slowly into the corner. Apparently, the usual picture for a private, even well-equipped house, if not one nuance - the house constantly lives 18 (!) The cats!

to Members.

The "volume" law of Archimedes is to overdo or underteach.
And traditionally a joke:
Husband: Dear, when I take the bathroom, he is always with me.
Wife: Not standing, but floating up.

He hated and put a "-" quote with a rating of 667.