bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №64798
 27.05.2012
More than a year ago, someone joked that for Eurovision from Russia you need to send gas, oil and babies immediately. Again not fully understood.

[ + 57 - ] Comment quote №64797
 27.05.2012
Conversation between two children 5-6 years old:
Shall we go to the hospital?
Let it
Is it an ambulance?
- Yes
Please take Katie.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №64796
 27.05.2012
Xxx: Our English teacher – a 70 year old grandmother – liked to move the middle finger in front of the faces of the students (i.e. In front of our faces) and shout loudly: "Are you understanding?"

[ + 32 - ] Comment quote №64795
 27.05.2012
Commentary on Lordi’s performance at Eurovision:

Maxim Zharkovsky
The animal on the keys looks like my ex-wife -))
12 May 2012 at 23:17

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №64794
 27.05.2012
Differences in Mentality:
The "Zippo" light bulb got its name because Americans hear the sound of opening-closing the lid. We would have called it "Bzdynyklats", most likely.

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №64793
 27.05.2012

"Buranov grandmothers" - in my opinion, we haven't trolled Europe so long ago

and.


[ + 66 - ] Comment quote №64792
 27.05.2012
We sit in the cinema, there is a break between traditional advertisements - a black screen, dark, before us a man tries to touch. Here, apparently doubting the correctness of the chosen row, he asks with a lame, procured bass:
Dimon, are you here?
And then the advertisement turns on again and a voice from the screen announces:
It was a voice from the bottom...
How did we roast.)

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №64791
 27.05.2012
xxx for yyy: did you have to fight with the corpse?
zzz for xxx: I hope this is not your crown phrase when dating a girl?

[ + 46 - ] [4 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №64790
 27.05.2012
Valadilen: the girl had nothing to eat - so we ate the Voyn's cakes, which he so carefully kept.
Are you not afraid to bite him now?
Valadiren: For the sake of this girl, you know, I’m not ready for that :) Something is in her...
Artem:... at least the Voiny Cake

[ + 37 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №64789
 27.05.2012
There are so many babies in the world to sleep with, and so few women to talk to.c) Ernest Hemingway

[ + 41 - ] [6 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №64788
 27.05.2012
I work as a seller in a night kiosk.Around half the third night, two girls knock.They take a pack of chips, two large snickers, a two-liter cola and chokopayki.The other with a sad voice:
Diet, diet...I told you to go to bed? I said that again after the joke, like last time we would run?! Take the oxandrolone!

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №64787
 27.05.2012
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[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №64786
 27.05.2012
From the chat lawnpinger.com
All people, like people, are drunk writing former text messages. And I turned on the computer today and feel like a venereologist looking at a tourist from Thailand.
yyy: Disorderly sex with questionable software?
XXX is AHA. And judging by what has been established, I’m not sure that all relationships were heterosexual.
yyy: :))))
XXX: I have a tetris.
Yyy: This is the “call of the former” :))))
XXX: No... the former is the Third Doom, and Tetris is the first love. My first love in the garden.

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №64785
 27.05.2012
It is discussed the hopelessness of dating sites, if the goal is not sex for 1 night, but marriage and family.

Donna Rosa from Brazil: I met a man on a overseas dating site and then moved to him to Brazil.
True, then I dropped him because he went to another and left me pregnant.
But I am raising my daughter, she is not very similar to her father. I have my own cacao plantation.

[ + 60 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №64784
 27.05.2012
I met my husband in an online game. After he said, “You’re going to attack again, fucking!”

[ + 29 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №64783
 27.05.2012
Talk about film
XXX: And then he was shot. They were shot with a knife.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №64782
 27.05.2012
You are a cowboy, I am a cowboy.
You are a cowboy, I am a cowboy.
We joke a lot about sex.
Valerian: And to fuck – no!

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №64781
 27.05.2012
5 days to pay. The money in the wallet is joke! Only for travel. Choo was upset. I went to the places of the past ass. I found chocolate. Not bad either :)

[ + 37 - ] Comment quote №64780
 27.05.2012
Love is when you want a woman even when you want to.

[ + 85 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №64779
 27.05.2012
An infinite number of mathematicians enter the bar. The first says:
I have a half litre of beer, please.
The second says:
I have a quarter of a liter.
The Third:
I have an eighth.
The Fourth :
I have a sixteenth.
The Barman:
Hey Hey Hey Hey, Stop! Here you have one liter for everyone - don't fuck my brain!

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