bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №159041
 28.11.2022
I am 17 years old, my first love. Camomile, butterflies and other romantic shit that usually happens in puberty.

And despite the fact that the hormones take down the roof, I realized one thing in my life right away: my safety is my problem. So I immediately worried that by the time of X, I had a condom. So he lay in his pocket and waited for his hour.



What could go wrong?

My mother, unfortunately, a lover of shaking on my personal things finds a condom and the following happens:

1st I am immediately accused of being a prostitute and will end my life on the panel.

2nd Mother goes to the boy’s parents. “Either you give the grandmother and we don’t write a statement, or let your son throw away that prostitute.”



I’ll say so, years later, I understand why the guy’s parents were openly against our relationship after that.

Of course, all relationships are gone. I was classified as a prostitute on all sides, and so I gained a “reputation” solely for my desire to be “safe.”



Not always the actions of parents are adequate, there are parents so frozen that children count days to leave the father's home.

As a result: you should not label the children, sometimes they themselves are very even "enchanted" by the actions of their relatives.

[ + 31 - ] Comment quote №159040
 28.11.2022
I also have a good memory on my faces. I was 16. I met a girl. After a while, I realized we had met somewhere before. I asked him what school he was in, he said. I am in 197th. It doesn’t coincide... But somehow we didn’t get together and in a month we broke up. At the end of the 10th grade, he began collecting photos for an album. I took a photo from 2nd grade and recognized it among everyone. I decided to call her. Yes, she studied with me until 3rd grade and then we went to different schools.) I was surprised, but I didn’t remember my school days. Another case was - as a child, my friend and I walked through the park, we were stopped by two older boys and picked out the little stuff. After 40 years I came to a new place of work and among the collective one of them was that “the thief.” Not thinking long, I said I remembered everything. He turned away, then approached and apologized for the past, gave me a pack of cigarettes and asked not to tell anyone about the case. Then we made friends with him.



YYY: How evil you are. I remember the guys who tried to print money from me on October 20, 1998, at 15:37, and you remember it 40 years later.



XXX: That is what I am.) This colleague once said - эх, where to get the money to upgrade the car. I reminded him – Go in and into the park, you know how to do it.



Fuck you are toxic.

[ + 38 - ] Comment quote №159039
 28.11.2022
xxx: I found myself in a hotel, turned on the telephone, and there is a Marvel movie "Shan Chi. The Legend of the Ten Rings. The episode where the protagonist tells a friend that his name is Shan, and she tries to repeat.

The Hero: Shan

My friend: Sean

The Hero: Shan

My friend: Shen

The Hero: Shan

Advertising by Ashan! The channel shows Ashan's advertisement for 5 seconds and then releases the movie.



yyy: Perfectly Integrated Advertising

[ + 36 - ] Comment quote №159038
 28.11.2022
One man installed a special system to prevent his dog from escaping the site: a fence with sensors and a necklace. The essence of the device is that when approaching the fence, the collar begins to feed. If the dog runs out of the boundaries, it will be hit by a weak current discharge.

Every morning the dog approaches the fence, the collar begins to feed, the dog waits for the sound in the collar, the battery does not sit down and runs away.

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №159037
 28.11.2022
XXX: I was called from the rooster. Good day! Comfortable to talk?

And I said, stay on the line, your call is very important to me, and I put a call to hold up... They gave up in three minutes.

No more calls, Tufo Tufo.

[ + 41 - ] Comment quote №159036
 28.11.2022
When there are 33 boys and 23 girls, this is the perfect combination. My husband and I now have 34, and she has 22. I recently decided to arrange dinner at a restaurant. Crabs, wine and pasta Alfredo. Then they walked around the city, complained to each other, so they reached the subway and went home.

Sex was unforgettable, magical! 10 years ago, when we first met.



YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

[ + 33 - ] Comment quote №159035
 28.11.2022
I drink tea with my wife. She has a romantic mood.

Do you want me to be my wife again? Wedding is better than the first time.

Okay, but you have to get divorced then.

We sit still.

[ + 35 - ] Comment quote №159034
 28.11.2022
I recently broke up with a girlfriend. 7 years of relationship and I just forgot how to frame the virgins. The cherry on the cake was fat. And today I caught myself in the thought that with my appearance, every step looks and feels crazy and crazy. The appearance decides, no matter how sad it is.



Yyy: There are even more grooves and the podcats will be beautiful, like bowling.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №159033
 28.11.2022
In ignorance it is easier to live, but it is harder to survive.

[ + 42 - ] Comment quote №159032
 28.11.2022
Our cat guarded a mouse for two nights and finally caught it. Proud and satisfied, he came to his mother’s room, jumped up on the bed and offered her a meal. She, trying not to envy, refuses, “No, no, boy, thank you, eat yourself!” The cat looked at her, then went to the kitchen, placed the mouse on his wardrobe and eaten.

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №159031
 28.11.2022
When Frederick the Great inspected the Berlin prison, all the prisoners swore to be innocent, and only one confessed to sitting for the robbery. What will you do here? Friedrich ordered that this robber be immediately thrown out of prison, so that he would not have a bad influence on the decent people gathered here.

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