bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 66 - ] Comment quote №35575
 05.09.2010
I am in a traffic jamming. I got Annie’s phone to read. The word "Joke" means silence. I again "Joke" - result 0. and so on 8. on the ninth, hoping to get a response of the type "such a command does not exist", I write "no how to fool?" - silence. And then I understand with horror that I write all this to the client.

[ + 56 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №35574
 05.09.2010
My mom had a snack on the day, for a week I ask:"Mom, what to give you?". Silence, with the rubbing of the hands and the blinking of the eyes in response all week...The day before it comes, you can see that it wears insomnia, the type you’t guess, and you won’t ask much...I repeat my question...Silence and looking into the floor, she gives me:"No, you can give the car to the country..."I’m in shock, I say:"An alternative is there?"...The alternative was the CUB DOWN...on the same date... in shock...I don’t want to retire.

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №35573
 05.09.2010
A familiar photographer told me. I write from the first person.
Kalymya somehow at the next wedding, everything as usual: photos in nature, on all the backgrounds there, etc. Now it is time for the restaurant. The guests gathered near the entrance, the parents hold the caravan, everyone is waiting for the young and the court enters, everyone freezes and breathes deeply. But a minute passes, another, no one comes out, silence...We decided to open the doors ourselves...and we watch the painting with oil, the bridegroom and the bride shook the buffalo in an embrace, all in shock. But that's not all, his wife was somehow brought home (to sleep out), and the bridegroom went away a little and went to a restaurant, and when he was congratulated with the wedding, he was offended and spoke: "What a bad wedding, I have a birthday!"and "

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №35572
 05.09.2010
Conversation with a friend:
We currently have 5 people in the company. You need to find a girl.
Wow: Yes, the current stuff is on the throat...I’d like to get it done first...
Q: Is there anyone in the reception?
I don’t believe in signs...

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №35571
 05.09.2010
Previously, Lenya Golubkov advertised all kinds of lies, and now Putin...

[ + 95 - ] Comment quote №35570
 05.09.2010
such an impression that neighbors even paste wallpapers with a perforator

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №35569
 05.09.2010
The xxx:
How did my LG get me?
YYYY :
What is?
The xxx:
Charging to call is not enough, but feeding, vibrating and flashing the lighting every 5 minutes it can
YYYY :
XD is

[ + 10 - ] Comment quote №35568
 05.09.2010
Without doing anything, you never know when you will finish.

[ + 40 - ] Comment quote №35567
 05.09.2010
My grandfather was born in 1909 and worked for a long time, up to the age of 76. For 60 years, he received in service a gift of expensive (300 rubles) and a deficient novelty - a radio on his legs, they only started to produce them.
After a while, I had to bring the radio to the home to repair.
Having seen such a rare inexpensive thing, there gladly counted for repair more than 10 rubles (you understand, a considerable amount of money in 1969). Grandfather paid for it. The next morning he was called, long apologized for the mistake and that the amount is about 3 rubles.
The grandfather thought and decided that the price was reduced when they read the engraved gift plaque on the radio: "That's for good faith work on the day of the 60th anniversary. Signature of the Prosecutor General of the USSR
by R. A. Rudenko.
(My grandfather served in the prosecutor’s office for 40 years.)

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №35566
 05.09.2010
News from 2020:
In Moscow, riots broke out in the Russian Quarter.

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №35565
 05.09.2010
Russian scientists are slowly beginning to change the magnetic field of the earth (:

<[Sky]Enlarge_you_pencil> iKrevedko

[ + 49 - ] Comment quote №35564
 05.09.2010
xxx: "Smoking kills" written on cigarettes
xxx: I attributed "and also robbed, raped and insulted by the mat".
I think it's time to quit (

[ + 46 - ] Comment quote №35563
 05.09.2010
In Spanish, Perla Negra means black pearl.
In Russian, everything is written and read.

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №35562
 05.09.2010
X. I have a small year today)))
Congratulations to you 😉
x.Ediaj came, picked up a sports suit, such a small puppy in it.))))
I bought her seed. 😉
X Why?? to
X. A A A A G G G G G G G G G))))

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №35561
 05.09.2010
Sex in the shower:

XX: Even if you were dressed and you were next to me, I’t take you to the shower.

WOW...and I would leave it.)

I am in the shower myself.)

[ + 45 - ] Comment quote №35560
 05.09.2010
Rat_S – Barrymore, and how did I go bankrupt? It’s all because of your addiction to Russian strawberries, sir!

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №35559
 05.09.2010
“The Lada Kalina Sport car was unexpectedly very comfortable, comfortable and reliable,” Putin said. At the tank he had a meeting with other car enthusiasts who went to replenish the fuel tanks of their iron horses. "And you try to buy this car. I assure you, you will not regret", - the prime minister recommended the product of the domestic automotive industry to fans of right-hand Japanese".

I am worried about the health of our Prime Minister.

[ + 44 - ] Comment quote №35558
 05.09.2010
Q: So what are you? I am sick of him!
NN is sick? from him? Will he soon be a dad?

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №35557
 05.09.2010
He: You’re not like everyone else... The other girls are somewhat empty, and you’re...
With a filler?

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №35556
 05.09.2010
Just to his neighbor his sister went, brought him a bottle of 0.5 litre mineral:
Sister: Here, I bought you minerals, you asked.
Neighbor: Is she so small?
I’m without a shirt today!
Neighbor: 0_0 I am generally about the mineral.

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