A friend told her that when she was relatively small, 16-17, her parents divorced, her father, an imposing man of 45 years, took only a car, though quite bullshit, and regularly came on weekends, visiting the daughter. And in the day-to-day, he did very different things: dressed fashionably, sat in his fashion machine and cut out the streets. If he saw a cute girl, he talked, signaled and offered to ride. It always ended differently until it was over at all.

On that unfortunate evening, the girlfriend’s parents, as usual, patrolled the area. He saw some two sympathies, walked up, swallowed, opened the window and polently offered to ride. The girls walked forward and did not turn. Our hero increased the pressure and just began to insist that the girls ride with him. At the fifth minute, one of the girls turned around and said:

Daddy, you have gone away, right?

I have a friend who is 8 years old and I don’t know why. It’s open to everyone, it’s on the go. A small trailer - quite good for himself outwardly, not the dumbest guy in the village, earns not just a huge amount of money, but for his city is quite even decent, and even an apartment is there. And the puzzle is simple, and he has been told it many times, but the man persistently does not believe it. Man is looking for an ideal. For him, the girl should be, 90-60-90, look like Angelina Jolie, fuck like Sasha Grey, cook like a makarevich on the Smack program, earn as a gasprom manager and at the same time on the first requirement to run to him. That one girl to match is not something that would be unrealistic, but it is difficult - it does not matter to him. And those who advise - they don't even look at him, they have other ideals. But okay, maybe he would find himself such a girl - only at every first date, he allows himself to roll out all his demands into a mixture with insults of all kinds of female, allowing himself expressions not quite literary) All the babies are frogs, females are scratched, one he is a dartajan)) Naturally, beyond one date does not go - and begins the question why I am alone....)

My friends carefully picked up a birthday present for my teenage daughter. We found in the store a magnificent edition of the Brothers Strugatsky. But they decided that it would be small, and added a few notes. Money was placed between the pages. Tell me, this is a surprise! Not only are the stories exciting, that make you think, but also the dungeons. The daughter’s reaction shocked them:

– Rodokie, are you completely squeezed? ! to Why do I need a book? ! to

- So you polystyred her, - shyly offered the shattered parents.

Why should I list her? ! to

Here you look! With these words, the father began to shake the book, and money came from there.

“Oh, you who are backward,” the daughter breathed, softening, “there is a envelope for that! It just ruined my mood.

This is where the birthdays really shrink.

Probably many who have sold things on websites have encountered the fact that the buyer calls, promises to come, and then changes his mind. I found a solution: first I set for myself the minimum amount for which I would give a thing, say, 2000, and in the announcement I raise it and bet 2200. When the buyer calls, I specify his price, allegedly forgot how much was stated in the ad, and call 2000. No one has fixed it yet, and everybody thinks it’s luck, and I need to take it before I get rid of it. They come lightning, drop 2000 and, satisfied with their "deception", leave =)

I am easily offended. After that, it is difficult to escape.

It was still in school. In our class there were two outlaws - Jurka and Vitalik, who mocked the boys, whose parents earned little... They called poor people, did bad things, spoiled things. In general, they tried to humiliate those who could not defend themselves. Why didn’t they gather and shake? Their parents were some serious chiefs from the city administration and when someone gave up the beasts ran away to complain, the school administration stood on the side of these wretches and dared to defend himself from there... In our class, one girl, who was raised by my grandmother and me, was strong. Because of poor vision, he always sat on the first batch and during the lesson all the garbage and chewed paper flew in his back.
At the next independent on the leaflets, Vitalik received a double, after the lesson he complained loudly about this injustice to Yurek, but instead of sympathy he heard only a vicious laugh, upset by these two circumstances, replied to his friend a penny, for which he immediately received in response - the two idiots fought shorter.
After classes, I ran through the classroom and cleaned this sheet and found it, it was immediately invented a worthy application. The next day on the way to school, he found a healthy fresh frozen dog cacao, squeezed a little with a stick, broke it off the ice and wrapped it in yesterday's notebook. In the classroom before the lesson, while Jurk was sinking in the hallway, he drove a cocoa mummy into his open wallet and prudently departed, hoping that no one had seen me. By the middle of the class, she stood out... and smelled. In the classroom began excitement and the search for the source, which was quickly discovered - Yurk. He grumbled and stated that - you were all stuck here, the teacher tried to calm the class, the class did not want to calm down, stumbled on Yurk and demonstrately clamped his noses. After a while, he began to smell himself and look at his feet. The lesson, meanwhile, ended, he put into the portfolio and found what was not there before, pulled out and unfolded. From the sheet falls back into the portfolio softened smelly sausage, and in his hands left a scratched paper, written by the hand of his friend, and also with the name-names. Along with the riot in Vitalika flew and pieces of ammunition from the portfolio. Everyone immediately fled the classroom and stood in the corridor, watching what was happening through the open door, only the teacher and these two fools remained.
Such behavior was not forgiven to them - they were forced to wash the class, the parents were called to school. As they cried... these crazy cries were heard even in the classrooms behind closed doors. They accused each other, the opponent’s children, the school, the teacher and the director personally. As a result - they planted Jurka and Vitalik in different parts of the class, they did not communicate with each other, and alone to stick to the rest, apparently, were afraid, so there was silence, only the back continued to fly papers, although not so often, but still terribly unpleasant.
After a couple of days, we had physical training, things and backpacks left in the dressing room, and we went to the big gym. Jurka before this became ill and, having been released for two weeks, waited for the lesson crawling through the hallway and eating the pancakes in the buffet. At home, I was prepared - soaked in a small plastic bottle and took it with me. Leaving the closet he poured the contents into Vitalkin’s wallet. Who did you think of? For those who did not go to school, there was a reason to take revenge. Again there was a scandal with screams, Yurk's parents transferred to another school, and Vitalik's nickname was attached to Ssany Govnomet. It was calm in the class.

Russian schoolchildren won the International Mendeleev Olympiad in Chemistry, winning 7 gold medals at once. At a reception in the Kremlin, Prime Minister Medvedev presented the children with memorable souvenirs and congratulated the future citizens of the United States and the EU.