National idea – to live and not to wash

Oligarch Viktor Vekselberg complained that because of the sanctions can not come to his family in New York.

Now told a colleague. He goes to work in a full route, a man stands up to give up his place. At this moment, a girl enters the stop and hopes to this place without a back-thinking. A confused colleague says to the man:

Better you sit down.

The man thought and said:

You know, I’m not interested in your words now, I’m going to court!

XXX: My name is Sasha. As it turned out in Spanish there is no sound of Sh. In Cuba, the owner of the apartment in which we lived called me Sacha.

And I immediately said that I could be called Alejandro)) But she liked speaking Sacha more.

Yyy: Alejandro should be deserved, Sacha))

I was called from the town hall.

The plaintiff painted. I have to meet him. You are in the woods, right? There and then. He will be the first deputy mayor.

I come - the complainant looks like an adequate person. He says I need to plant a tree here. To get to the stop, remove the drill to get home.

I say – no question – what the owner of the city forests will order – I will do. At least tomorrow. The owner of the forest is the city. I work on contract.

Deputy Mayor to the complainant:

What are you looking at me? We do not have a forest roller or loader in the municipality. We do not decide anything.

The applicant (grandfather of the 90s), thinking:

Why are you then at all? Why did they come here.

To consider your complaint.

I was not concerned about the complaint, but the decision.

Sam did not find anything to answer.

I was driving in a placard. At one of the stations, a woman in the years in the upper regiment opposite. A bit of the weather, she includes music on the phone. Some sectarian songs. Dreams under them and occasionally adds noise. Listen to this or. When I get it. I got tired I got up and saw: Aunt in the headphones, and the switch from the phone fell out. She doesn’t hear them, but we’re okay ?

Even going to take out a can of garbage, a woman should always be prepared that on the way she will be invited to a ship or ball.

Dog of Torpedo

The adulterous bet was made in the 40s of the 19th century between the Governor-General of the Novorossian Territory Vorontsov and his friend, the local landlord Toropov. These honorable gentlemen were invited to observe the indicative detention of smugglers at the customs. Upon completion of the procedure, Toropov skeptically stated that the smuggling at the Novorossian Customs was put out of hand badly, he would have done much better. Of course, I’t be caught. “Look, you are in vain,” the chief of customs murmured, “no scammer will pass by us.” “Do you want to bet? Suddenly the warriors resurrected. – I’ll bet a hundred thousand on the fact that it won’t be possible to smuggle the smuggling!” – Accepted – agreed Toropov. They conspired that tomorrow the landlord would appear at the customs with diamonds, ringlets and various jewelry for ten thousand rubles. If all this is not discovered during the inspection, he wins the dispute.

At noon the next day, the crew of Toropov arrived at the customs station. The landlord obediently went into the room for inspection, where he was separated and carefully touched his clothes and underwear. Nothing anywhere. Similarly, the cushion was inspected, the crew's cushion was ripped off - no results. Here the chief of the customs asked for permission to destroy the wheelchair, paying the owner its cost in case of failure. “Ruby!” smiled the Torop. Customs officers scattered the crew, but found nothing. Eventually, the dark chief of the customs raised his hands before the Governor General: “The inspection is over.”

“Where is your smuggling?” asked Vorontsov a smiling landlord. He whispered, and a white pudel ran to him. The dog came with the landlord and sat quietly at the wing all this time. Toropov carefully cut off the skin on her back, and it turned out that it was an ordinary brittany courtyard, on which the skillful “contrabandist” wrapped a ring, intersecting them with jewelry, and on top carefully covered it all with a piece of hairy fur. There was nothing left but to admit that Toropov won the bet.