bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 24 - ] Comment quote №130380
 06.07.2016
I bought a new screwdriver. I was frankly surprised that it charged via USB(!) connector. Long thought about why: update the firmware or read error codes?

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №130379
 06.07.2016
very educational

to this
The PDD says that if there is no pedestrian crossing in direct sight, it means that the pedestrian crossing here can be crossed.

The Rules. Section of 4. Section of 4.3. Section of 2. In the absence of a crossing or crossing in the zone of visibility, it is permitted to cross the road at a straight angle to the edge of the road in sections without a dividing strip and a fence where it is well visible in both directions.
1st You can move if
A. There is no
B. There is no separation line
2nd Drivers in this case should not give you the road.
Three You must move in such a way as not to interfere with drivers.


[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №130378
 06.07.2016
The sexual question.

When I was young, I was in the guest house of a young man. There was no sex in the country at the time, the internet was not invented, the court and parents remained.
And by chance I heard the conversation of the younger sister of that guy with a girlfriend (girls at 13 years old).
One says, “Well, it’s fun to try, but that’s what kids do. OK, even if a normal child is born, and suddenly such a fool as my brother? will be worshipped.

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №130377
 06.07.2016
I read the lessons here on how to present children with information about sex, and I understand that we have no sexual education from the word at all, it hurts sleepers, citizens, and your ideas, and reasoning.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №130376
 06.07.2016
In my distant teenage age, the problem of sexual education was one: everyone knew that you could get pregnant from sex, get syphilis, your boyfriend will leave you, you will never get married, etc. But in school, courtyard, children's camp or among relatives there was always a girl who has been fucking for a couple of years and she, fucking, is okay.

[ + 27 - ] Comment quote №130375
 06.07.2016
SPRUT: Fuck, I wonder, from the AKS-74U without an example to shoot really more or less in the direction of the target? Scratch *
Third: Canvas
Third: the short
Tagged with: clear
Third, it is easy to shoot. difficult to get.

[ + 28 - ] [8 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №130374
 06.07.2016
>> And many drunkards are often just nervous.

Yes, "from the nerves" And also from weakness and inability to solve problems in any other way. And adult uncles often, rounding their eyes, wonder, say, but how else to relax?! to
And that, blh, is not even funny anymore.
No interests, no entertainment, everything was replaced by alcohol. Three and fourth.

And yes, "from the nerves" it is necessary to go to the psychotherapist, and not to silence any shit.
And the adult people know about it, but they will not go, because "oh, yeah, I don't like doctors more", "oh, and what he can help me, he doesn't know me", "oh, yeah, I lie it all, and the watermelon will help", "oh, yeah, I have everything normal, everything around me is the same", and sometimes even "doctors-killers, I won't go anywhere!!and "
And that "all around are the same" is even scary.
Even worse, these are all words, mattevo, adult people.

[ + 21 - ] Comment quote №130373
 06.07.2016
Xhx: I can’t photograph her face. I extend my eyes to the whole screen, I look... the pulse is accelerating, the breathing is gone, the mouse in the hands is whispering from pressure, the eyes are darkened. Immediately reduce back - everything becomes normal.

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №130372
 06.07.2016
@Verbitskiy: Pash, will you go tomorrow?
@Liloviy_yoj: Why tomorrow, as much as I know him, he’s always gone.

[ + 29 - ] Comment quote №130371
 06.07.2016
> "Well, you want me to lead, and we can’t look at the clouds together".

That was how we drove from Volgograd to Rostov last night. I was unable to sleep in advance, so I asked my wife to talk to me all the time so I couldn’t fall asleep. She then also said, "Let's go, I will lead - the dream as with the hand will take away."

[ + 43 - ] Comment quote №130370
 06.07.2016
Our dog knows the necessary minimum of training teams, but one of them is our discovery. “Fuck the cat.” We lie down, we sleep, this mocked night resident begins to bustle, scream, wear and crumble all in a row. To get up, of course. One team - and the dog is already understood :) no, he has never hurt or bitten him, just with a worried look bites him slightly and tries to keep in place, showing in every way that the cat's behavior is unacceptable. It is comfortable :)

[ + 18 - ] Comment quote №130369
 06.07.2016
Angry when you receive a message from the Ministry of Emergencies, finally watch the movie-catastrophe "Aftermorrow" and peacefully wait for death, and from the sky not even a drop!

[ + 26 - ] Comment quote №130368
 06.07.2016
At the USSR exit, in the 1980s, I had to work for some time in the Soviet household. The council was large, prosperous, the mechanic’s salary roughly corresponded to the master of the shop in the city. So, the men drank almost everything, and starting at a very delicate age. Two of the dozens of tractors left the field sober: a newly arrived Southern guy (a Muslim?) A 50 year old widow. Having obtained a new tractor, the tractors rushed to wash it, as a result of which they drowned the naphyg (although in a lake, not in vodka, but nevertheless drowned). In the youth, a special chic was considered not even a politury, but an imported perfume. And you say, a letter from a shiver at the workplace...

[ + 27 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №130367
 06.07.2016
My second half loves one dance show, respectively, sometimes watched together, but I never got into what’s going on there and just listened to it as a background. On one of those evenings, announcing the participants of the show and hearing among them an extremely rare surname, I decided for the sake of interest to see who is wearing such a rare surname and bat, and this participant is familiar to me!

I ask the girl, “What is the name of this participant?”

“Yulia, a very good girl, she’s dancing so well, she’s in the nomination and can fly out today, and I’m sick for her.”

Exactly, the name too, I heard this name, I remembered the lady - I met her a couple of times, I was at her performance, even in the theater together, not on a date, but so.

My girlfriend is curious and asks, “What are you interested in her?”

I answered as it is, as if I had nothing with her, and these events happened five years ago. In the end, she did not ask any more questions, but darkened. Okay, I thought I did.

When at the end of the show announced that it was Yulia who flew out, my girlfriend broke the silence - "So you need it, fuck!"

[ + 23 - ] Comment quote №130366
 06.07.2016
From the comments to the news "Roskomnadzor warned the portal "Judicial decisions" for the publication of the court decision":

HOKUM13: What annoys you in excessive PD? For example, I would be happy if I could check my neighbors for pedophilia. This would protect my children much more effectively than blocking websites with CC.
Tyomitch: Suppose you would find that one of your neighbors is a pedophile, or a satanist, or a neo-Nazi, or even a Windows Vista fan.
Tyomitch: What is next? Shake him a mouth? Moving to another house? Will you move him to another house? How will this knowledge help you to “restore your children”?
Nikon_NLG: “Masha, remember, you can never talk to this uncle. It is very dangerous! And if he’s going to say there’s a problem with my dad’s computer and you need to put Vista on it, just press that red button!”

[ + 30 - ] Comment quote №130365
 06.07.2016
ISIS recruiter refuses to go to Syria due to lack of toilet paper

Not only Americans without toilet paper are unable to fight.

<><><>>
Guess who taught you.

[ + 20 - ] Comment quote №130364
 06.07.2016
xxx: [jxe nhf[fwf lhjxrf yt gjvjuftn]
Please do not broadcast this!!! to
This is not for you!!!! to

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №130363
 06.07.2016
xxx: And I will go to me tomorrow to the MTS office and knock on the carpet in front of the door, under the pretext that they have not refused this service.

[ + 18 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №130362
 06.07.2016
Then the traditional breeding and selection is the use of millennia-old API, along with a bunch of auxiliary scripts (patty microflora, forest fungus, feedback) to balance the load. Strict typing, complex self-organizing system, failure safety.

– is
For those who believe in the horrors of GMO!

Radiation exposure and the use of mutagens are now traditional selection.
Or are you talking about the strawberries of strawberries? With these methods, everything could have been done. There will be nothing more. Live yourself in your antiquity with three varieties of apples and one tomato.

[ + 28 - ] Comment quote №130361
 06.07.2016
In fact, normal working people even explain to children that you cannot be in the plane of movement of the instrument.

Those are children. They are sorry. And then journalists.

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