It is good to be able to do everything yourself. It’s crazy that you have to do everything yourself.

Steve Jobs is quoted.

There were times when I didn’t have my own room. I slept with my friends on the floor, and in order to buy food, I took out Coca-Cola bottles. Every Sunday I walked 10 kilometers to eat at a charity dinner at the Krishna temple once a week. And you know what? It was a wonderful time!

Speech to Stanford Graduates, 2005

The monument to the Ukrainian poet Taras Shevchenko was dismantled from the central square of Tokmak in the Zaporozhye region, while the monument to Lenin remained on the same square. They confused the yopt, it is a monument.

Working with customers is a tough thing... People are very different) today I will have to write to the customer, - "I clarified with the supplier, and I am forced to tell you that the package opened with scissors is opened and it will not be possible to change it. His mother, seriously.

Oh guys! Programmer’s Day is the 256th day of the year, in the high season of 2016 it is September 12.
In the low year, September 13.
Who and how did you decide that the programming day is February 14?

Women don’t like other people’s children, other people’s children – this means that part of the family budget and time of the spouse is spent on another person’s family... "Men don’t like other people’s children..."

Let’s talk for all men and women, right? Someone fucking important the fact of genetic kinship, someone it is not fuck at all: "Parents are not those who gave birth, but who raised."

Surprise: People are different.

A man in Israel on arrival took the apartment and signed the contract without understanding it (in Hebrew). When he started to leave, the owner told him to paint the apartment, because it is said in the contract. The man looked, it was really said.



I saw, bought paint, painted all the walls and ceilings. The owner came and almost his karachun was not enough - the paint was black. And the man tells him that the color of the paint is not specified in the contract.

Review of electric toothbrush in one well-known online store:
If you still have doubts, then my advice to you is better to try once than to suffer with guessing - how does it work / is it convenient?

It works. is comfortable.

I thought about buying an electric toothbrush for a long time, and then just dumb-drunk bought this miracle. I am very pleased"

My friend was coming home from work. Time about 9 p.m. Further from his words.



I go, I don’t touch anyone. In the store bought beer, sausages, even there for small things. I paid and went home. This is like in a cheap detective: three people were arrested. Oh, all under 2 meters tall, a little more beautiful than the devil. “Are you smoking?” “I don’t smoke,” he said, “and I saw you buy cigarettes in the store.” “No guys, it’s not for me” and “Who?” “Who’s the beer?” And then my friend immediately came up with the thought that they didn’t want cigarettes. Well he’s a whisper like me, he just knocked, “No, guys, let’s go.” And here’s one of them just hitting him in the face (the time is around 21:00, it’s dark, there’s no one around). My friend slipped and fell. And here, where you can’t get, GBB. Those three were laid on the ground, and their eldest friend said, “Live?” “The living.” It turns out that the GBR was monitoring these three species, but there was no reason to take them, and there was a robbery of clean water. They apologized to a friend for coming so late, they needed to record the very fact. They said you would come to write tomorrow and accompany them home. The verdict has already entered into legal force, from 6 to 14. There was also a recurrence.

It was in the pool this afternoon. Children were taught to swim on neighboring trails. They fool, they fool, where without it. But especially fairy was the cry of the teacher in the hall: "Zhenya, I asked not to run on the water!"

At the time, my lecturer in literature served in the army. He served after the 4th graduate of Philfax. He served normally, although he was called after 20 years. And his nickname in the army was Pushkin. All because he did not beat his ghosts. He had nine soldiers. Four of them are from the Caucasus. During the province, he did not beat them with boots, did not put on glasses, did not blow their head.



He forced them to teach poetry! If he fixed the flight, he approached and said, "Radovoi Katayev, dress up! Pushkin’s Tale of the Goldfish. This meant that the fighter had to run to the library, take Pushkin's fairy tales and be prepared for the fact that at any moment he could be dragged and he would have to "respond to the lesson". If someone disregarded the task, he got it. Rarely, very rarely, they were still pined, but most often they stood up in the wildest clothes. As a result, after some time, all nine people knew Eugene Onegin by hand. One day, during a regional commission, as a demonstration of the active creative activity of the part, he showed the papas number. Several soldiers in the roles read Pushkin. Four of the speaking Caucasians read better than the Russians. Some noted, the company was designated as exemplary, everyone was very pleased.

Southerners do not understand when after a month with air temperature -40 and with a fierce wind comes -15 and silence.

Great weather today.

It is just warm.)

“When it’s snow, it’s always warm.”

Testers of a large IT company:
Q: The text editor does not support Klingon) try it yourself)
I: Emm... and how does it show up? Do you want it for Star Trek fans or for extraterrestrial races?)))
Q: Do few people use our product and for what purposes))
I: Well I can tell you, you can ask the designers what they would add)) And then the Klingons are quite hard (((
P: I mean in general, the problem is there)
I: And the elephant by the way supports)))The elves are simply more solvent than the clingons, so the product is primarily aimed at them)
Q: They live in the woods, this is a shorter coincidence.
And: Then probably our director is the Dark Elf)))

Vodka is a budget option of happiness.

But culturally it is beneficial.

The words of a friend. A beloved aunt decided to visit her grandson for Christmas - from Peter directly to the French-speaking Geneva. I was flying a Swissair flight in the morning. I fell asleep and had breakfast. She calls the stewardess and, since she is not strong in the foreign, tries to ask her to bring breakfast. Nothing at all. And then the brain, having conducted one known analogy, gives a set of familiar and seemingly appropriate sounds in the situation, but absolutely incomprehensible to him:
“Monsieur, je ne mange pas six jours” (Monsieur, je ne mange pas six jours)

To my surprise, it worked! Two servings of breakfast! True, I had to eat everything under the supervision of a caring stewardess and the victims of what is happening in the crisis in Russia neighbors-francs...

Messie, I don't eat for six days - Kisa Vorobyaninov from "12 chairs"

At work in the dining room today was Indian beef in curry sauce. None of the crowd of visitors even thought about what was going on.

If you are attacked by a vampire, bite him first. At least he will be offended.

XXX is:
A funny story. My daughter (7 years old) became interested in how we jump up, and in Australia (from the other side of the Earth) they still jump up, they also head down.

explained and explained. Then he opened the unit, threw a sphere of 1000 meters in radius on the stage, put a pair of characters: "This is Earth, this is in Moscow, this is in Australia, this is how they jump."

Everything immediately became clear. Gilmore is rolling.

The tax on gasoline in Russia from April 1 may rise by two rubles. According to the head of the Ministry of Finance, the increase in excise taxes, if it will be approved, should not lead to an increase in fuel prices.

Wife instructs how to put a one-year-old son to sleep:
Don’t look him in the eyes, otherwise it’s over. Better to pretend to be dead, then he goes around and lags behind.