bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 82 - ] Comment quote №22267
 08.11.2009
In bed are a boy and a girl, a girl reading a book:

He: Can we have sex?
She: No
He: Can you prepare something to eat?
She: No
Do you want to get rid of your book?
She: No
He (a little quieter): Can I buy you a collar?
She is: No. It is fucking! Yes!
He is X*Y to you, not the collar, the serpent.

[ + 90 - ] Comment quote №22266
 08.11.2009
Women's popular wisdom: she invented herself offended herself

[ + 68 - ] Comment quote №22265
 08.11.2009
By the way, I learned to shake at the time by reading the article “Masturbation” in the Great Soviet Encyclopedia.

[ + 88 - ] Comment quote №22264
 08.11.2009
and cut off the caps, blonde in panic
She is not a blonde.
Tagged: YAH HALK
Blondes press the headlamp to burn
Hulk doesn’t like to burn a lamp.
Q: What broke the lamp?
WOW: Halk Hold the Shift

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №22263
 08.11.2009
Hey producers, catch the idea.
Dryers "IT-shiny": in packs with conventional dryers (sticks) place dryers-pins (sticks).

[ + 70 - ] Comment quote №22262
 08.11.2009
On television it was that there was a scandal at the space station. Russian astronauts ask for sausages O_o
The breakfast ended there.

[ + 75 - ] Comment quote №22261
 08.11.2009
to this:
My puppy, after seeing, apparently, the advertisement of a cat's whirlpool with a parkour, its own (the whirlpool) eaten and drowned from the balcony (3th floor).
The people! Turn off advertising! Take care of the animal!

Take care of the animal! Cats have no fear of height, so normal people either do not let the baskets on the open balcony, or put net.

and more. Advertising commercial food plants cat kidneys - it is essentially a painted cardboard with attracts. A normal veterinary food (Hills, Proplan, Eagle Pack, etc.)Although it is more expensive than a kilogram, it needs to be three times less – because there is no nonsense to volume. Is it hard to go to the zoo once a month instead of taking viscasoids in the supermarket?

Bring to such "catchers", pls.

[ + 82 - ] Comment quote №22260
 08.11.2009
...xxxx...
What do you do?
and phobos.
I’m waiting for you to come in the ashes.)
...xxx
Here it appeared.
..fobos_ua13..
Now you have to find a new meaning in life.

[ + 102 - ] Comment quote №22259
 08.11.2009
I have been in England for the third month.
I woke up for something at six in the morning... I decided that there was nothing to do to put a mask of fake food on my head, because my salary is the next day, and my hair has been asked to eat for a long time. To be faithful, he went out to the Internet, where he found the praiseful odes of oatmeal... Having purchased the yellow egg that I was familiar with, and having roasted his roughly red hairstyle abundantly, left it, as it is supposed, for half an hour. Now, my mother, I will be at work in 20 minutes, and I’m chesting out the remains of cloves from my hair... And I already imagine a possible dialogue:

Chief (typical Western English): Anthony, what’s in your hair?
I am (not annoyingly) Oatmeal sir
N: What is she doing there, Anton?
I am stuck sir.

[ + 70 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №22258
 08.11.2009
For everyone, when the computer catches the glue, Mommy confidently claims that it's because of downloaded games and movies?? to

[ + 80 - ] Comment quote №22257
 08.11.2009
DMA: I want a favor "Replace all the shit with a hoodie"

[ + 90 - ] Comment quote №22256
 08.11.2009
New clothes and clothes, have you bought them?
Fuck, I have grown up.
– (O_o)

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №22255
 08.11.2009
<****> Tell me what the error comes out when you start the computer! None of the games have been set up!!!
<u****> **** The computer wants to play. Give him a couple of games.

[ + 73 - ] Comment quote №22254
 08.11.2009
xxxx(13:32:45 6/11/2009)
Fuck, I already found a partner for sex in Minsk, and I didn't find the song

[ + 65 - ] Comment quote №22253
 08.11.2009
Readers, I remind you – throw out the tree!
___________________________________________
Maybe not, but the new year is coming soon.

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №22252
 08.11.2009
Is it hard to quit smoking? Try to stop choking!

[ + 56 - ] Comment quote №22251
 08.11.2009
Wikipedia is pleased. The 50-megaton thermonuclear Tsar bomb. Commentary on one of the pictures (satellite picture of the city, surrounded by a large red circle): "Radius of total destruction during the explosion, for visibility imposed on the map of Paris".

[ + 60 - ] Comment quote №22250
 08.11.2009
Hello, are you in WoW?
YYY: No
XXX Why?
YYY: I have a girlfriend
XXX: And what about it?
YYY: We are playing in La2

[ + 62 - ] Comment quote №22249
 08.11.2009

Put everything in the closet carefully.
How is it careful?
This is when you open the closet and nothing falls out of it.

[ + 91 - ] Comment quote №22248
 08.11.2009
in the chat

Restart in 15 seconds
[ 1 ] General: Dalaran] [xxx]: Tla again ((
[ 1 ] Give the mail to the beast!
Reboot in 10 seconds
[ 1 ] ZZZZ: We have played. and. and.
[ 1 ] General: Dalaran [xxx]: play again in real
Reboot in 5 seconds
Reboot in 4 seconds
Restart in 3 seconds
[ 1 ] Those who are wicked,
Reboot in 2 seconds
[ 1 ] Total: Dalaran [nnn]: 4 8 15 16 23 42
Reboot in 108 minutes
[ 1 ] General: Dalaran [xxx]: O_O
[ 1 ] [Zzzz]: What is this for FIGNIA???? to

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna