bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 141 - ] Comment quote №41414
 09.01.2011
- and also to study with me a girl who seriously believes that the last president of the USSR was Nikita Mikhalkov.
But the most frightening thing is that when she said this in a couple, only two people laughed.
I am a predator.

[ + 61 - ] Comment quote №41413
 09.01.2011
In the pharmacy (morning 7 jan)
Boy: - Girl, can you watt and manganese?
I too, only two bands and a mango.
The next girl in line: You won’t believe it.

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №41412
 09.01.2011
Today at the bar:
At the neighboring table, two girls eat salads there, pizza all kinds, two bead-types trample nearby and look straight to eat the girls. After a while one can’t stand, stands up, approaches the girls and says, “You’ve eaten so much! Maybe for a week, right? Can we meet you?"

[ + 63 - ] Comment quote №41411
 09.01.2011
My wife and mom are a crazy Twitter. They remember everything I whispered when I was drunk.

[ + 52 - ] Comment quote №41410
 09.01.2011
She (02:50:57 9/01/2011)
I am irritating you, right?? to
on (02:51:00 9/01/2011)
No is
She (02:51:07 9/01/2011)
Do not scream!! to
on (02:51:12 9/01/2011)
No to fuck!

[ + 47 - ] Comment quote №41409
 09.01.2011
Astrologers announced a hunger strike. Mortality among astrologers has doubled.

[ + 48 - ] Comment quote №41408
 09.01.2011
Go to study!I know, you will read it here!Your Dean.

[ + 64 - ] Comment quote №41407
 09.01.2011
A few days ago, I saw a blonde who, waiting for something or someone, during the snowfall, apparently suffered for a long time with doubts that the haircut would be more damaged, the snow falling on her head or the hat thrown on her. In the end, the choice was made in favor of the cappuccino. But this should be done a little earlier, that is, before it is filled with snow.

[ + 77 - ] Comment quote №41406
 09.01.2011
xxx - My cat lived for 18 years.
Uninterrupted for 18 years?? to
XXX - No, with a break!! to

[ + 59 - ] Comment quote №41405
 09.01.2011
I watched on YouTube a video about a conveyor from Lego that made small machines from these same Lego parts. One man's comment, just killed: the workers of the car with horror threw their quads

[ + 61 - ] Comment quote №41404
 09.01.2011
Iona: And you are from which city?
Inzone of Tomsk. And you?
Iona: Omsk
by Iona : )
I thought it wasn’t far away.)
Iona: We are constantly receiving applications from Tomsk in the bank
Iona: The program is confusing
Inzone: ah, some think it’s one city))
Iona: we are decrypted as a remote place of reference for prisoners
Iona: What about you?
Inzone: we also have a remote place of reference for the prisoners :)))))))
Iona: )))))))))))

[ + 73 - ] [3 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №41403
 09.01.2011
In response to Miley...
How to remove a lamp from your mouth. Urgently!

The answers:
Put a photo.
- turn the basement, rub... the mouth will warm up - it will become wider, the lamp will easily come out

[ + 50 - ] Comment quote №41402
 09.01.2011
Brain Stew 21:32
The man wrote about a man who shuddered on a pump and his bowel was torn off.
The author’s imagination is good.

Horror Show 21:34
This man saved my gut! Now in the pool I tremble only in metal swimsuits!

Brain Stew 21:35
It is not convenient to swim in the pool.

Brain Stew 21:35
Probably not comfortable.

[ + 54 - ] Comment quote №41401
 09.01.2011
I just love one person very much and for him I am ready to do everything.
YYY: Bella, who is this?
XXX is me! and thou shalt

[ + 17 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №41400
 09.01.2011
Swedes Alexei Vladimirovich, be so kind, come down from where you are, into my arms. Stop making noise. I love you, you love me. Let us be friends.

and miss. Please please.

[ + 65 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №41399
 09.01.2011
I feel like a step-by-step function of the heavy side. And you?
I am somewhere equal to infinity, but the rest is a complete zero.

[ + 51 - ] Comment quote №41398
 09.01.2011
My son, for the money he received for Christmas from his grandmothers, bought a book by Richard Dawkins, God as an Illusion. I am afraid that next year he will not receive Christmas presents from his family.

[ + 78 - ] [2 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №41397
 09.01.2011
For 10 years, my boys and I have been working together. And a month and a half ago there appeared a kind of fox, so tall, in a black coat with a pressed collar and a moustache like a boiled leech. Here is his car all white with a deaf toning.
Today I and the boys in the number of nine people came to him, saying we can’t go here, our type of district. And he is "Tetragrammaton. We can do everything" We wanted to overthrow and shut up, and he got two injuries from his sleeves and kicked us off with his handles. Is it normal?

[ + 47 - ] [1 Комментарии к цитате] Comment quote №41396
 09.01.2011
WmP: The faithful today smiled. During the day, I sleep - since the new year, the regime has not completely recovered, and the beloved is angry all the time because of this, because I do not pay attention to her. Well, as a sign of protest, she begins to shake me up and shouts disgustingly and quickly: "Don’t sleep! Do not sleep! Do not sleep! Do not sleep! Do not sleep!"
WMP: I don’t think of anything. I just understand that I am being awakened and screaming over my ear "Pe-nis! The Penis! The Penis! Penis! Penis! and Penis!

[ + 61 - ] Comment quote №41395
 09.01.2011
Olya.lion: and can you find out - what are the advantages of programmers?
Ping.Win: Many of you are familiar with the virtues of a programmer. There are only three, and of course this is: laziness, impatience and pride. Larry Wall
Olya.lion: what are the shortcomings?
Ping.Win: The programmers are perfect. They have no shortcomings.

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