Xxx: I’m going on the bus, I’m going to get out at the stop. I approached the door, and in front of me was a girl with a three-year-old boy. The girl has a bag in her hands, a bag, and the street is slippery, so when the door opened, I picked up the baby’s ankles and put it on the ground. Instead of thanking me, my mother looked at me with horror-filled eyes and said, “What did you do?” I realized that I made a mistake when I heard the scream, “YAYA HOTEEEEL SAAAM!” Apologizing, I rushed to work as it happened to me with this couple was on the way and all the way I listened to or that he wanted to go out by himself

Xxx: During a fight, one of my children broke a window, and 20 years later they still didn’t admit who did it. They don’t know I have a video from a surveillance camera, and I’m planning to show it at a criminal wedding.

How can you tell the difference between a man and a monkey?
The monkey has everything. A man says one thing, thinks another, does the third, and comes out the fourth.

One old man, a typical representative of the class of the bourgeoisie, came to the doctor for a reception and ran on Lexus, but that doesn’t matter. The doctor nodded over his back, smashed his side and decided to let go with peace and courage, to return in 2 weeks.
“And while you’re at home, do the exercises yourself,” the doctor tells him. “Here’s the disc of Dr. B. You have to do every day, from the morning, everything that is shown there, except GREBLY! Remember, except for the rabbits! Understood everything?
The man said he understood and went away. A week passed and he called the doctor and said:
"Listen, I did everything like you said except for the scramble, but I didn't understand the disc.
How did I not understand? Can you not understand there? Come here, I will explain.
The man left, and while the doctor was waiting for him, he thought. “What, stupid, what you can’t understand, physical exercise disk, look and do.”
The man came and found out... It turns out, the daughter put in order in her father’s office, and in the box with the disc of Dr. B. was an old Czech cartoon about KROTA! Remember this good Soviet cartoon? So, this man watched the cartoon about the crocodile this week and performed all the movements behind it. And in this series, there was just another moment where the crot on the boat creeps. Well, the man, as he promised, did everything except roast.

As my grandfather told me, "Don't try to make all the money, try not to waste what is."

Xxx: When we returned home without the dog, our cat, about half an hour after our return, suddenly caught up, went around the whole apartment four times, made sure it wasn't there, looked at us for a long time - and we didn't say anything here - went to our bed and lay down to die. For a few days I barely moved. I reluctantly sliced half a tablespoon of farce from my hands (this is our cat who loved to eat all his life!!!He agreed to lick the water twice and lay down.

He survived when he brought a puppy. I smiled. He got up, went away. and Eat. I found the strength to live another year and a half. He grew up this young man and yet gave in to the age. I hope he is there with his beloved girlfriend. We will meet again, all together.

Oh, I once had a husband, too, he had a madam "yes, she was like my younger sister, but never for anything, and there were no thoughts!" Do you know Sha? Not scorned, scorned, betrayed, it turns out, with a completely different grandmother!

I remember a companion went on a business trip for a couple of weeks and gave me his cat on a bench. The cat was old, did not eat food, eaten almost basically only fish, which she needed to cook, because from old age to chew raw could not especially. And one day, and it was summer, my colleagues and I organized a small corporate, went to fire a shale, where I dressed quite, which is not inherent to me in principle. I came home at night and remembered that I needed to feed the cat. He took a small pot, threw the fish there, poured water and decided to lie down. Naturally, in a drunk state, I immediately crashed. I woke up from the fact that this cat wept at me, beating my legs on my face. The whole apartment was in smoke. The water apparently boiled out, and the fish in the pot began to roast and then burn. The apartment was fully ventilated then day two, and the cat came out and saved the life of a drunkard.