by Habr
Recent news about implemented and implemented achievements, give a more and more strong feeling that we have long been living in the future.
YYY: According to the law of preservation, if the future comes somewhere, the past comes somewhere. And I even know where.

Conversation with my wife:
Why have you been so suspicious lately?
I am, I am choking?
- Yes
Hm... strange...

Throw a web developer on a web-man, got into a web-mord.

>>>>
xxx: I came to the store today to look for a swimsuit, and I am saying "no more, there will be no swimsuits, here are the boots we are going to bring mud"))
>>>>

Is it Saloon? Only there in one “trade hall” of 6 square meters.
Skin, honey, shit and nails
Clocks, clocks and bullets.

Although, I remember, they were specifically travelling through rural shops and bought real Italian Martini there. Ruby 8 and EMNP. With that label, a high print, like a engraving. Or the dollar. There is no such thing for any money (Oh, yes! And Cuban cigars in aluminium cartridges "Romeo and Juliet" 80 kopecks And rum Havana Club.
by Fuck! Do you fuck!

xxx: The group I studied in was nicknamed the disaster group.

One day, a prisma disappeared from the lab. It is made of optical glass and is quite healthy. Who needs it, you ask? It turned out to be very simple: one madmuazel did a lab about determining the fracturing factor, counting 2.41. I looked at the sign – a finger! and diamond. Life succeeded" decided the girl, put the sample in the bag and ran out. Neither the weight of the sample (a half pound) nor the shape of the fence (a triangular prisma) brought doubt into the soul of the billionaire. Since then, there has been a saying: "The best friends of the fool is the K8 optical glass."

An employee at work studying the possibilities of Word 2007, changing the size of the font issued:
What is the size of the electricity up to 72???! to
Fix the pencil from the keyboard.
How is?
With pens! Enter from the keyboard.
What kind of pencil!!? to
Those of you are growing up!! to

I went to the bank today and heard something wonderful. The young couple is advised on consumer credit. Take to wedding. They leave the application, wait for a decision, sit on the couch.

She is:

200,000 is not enough? On the other hand, Uncle Elshit from Kogalyam will come.

He is:

We counted everything. Without Uncle Ilshata – one hundred fifty, with him – two hundred.

I want to see Uncle Elisha.

The case happened in the hospital 6 years ago, I was lying in the intensive care unit, with me in the chamber were 4 women of very old age. But, to my surprise, the stereotypes about grandmothers did not spread to them. We could talk about everything, they were fun, funny, and to one of them came a husband-grandfather from another chamber and every evening read to us all the poems of Yesenin, Brodsky and Blok. by Naughty!) But history is not about that.

With feeding in the state hospitals was always bad, that year was no exception. But every night after work, my mother came to me and brought me some delicious food. No, I could have done it myself, but the hospital was not full-time. Every night, at the same time, I went out to meet my mother. And one evening she called and warned that she would not come, was delayed at work. The salt was that she called at 18:20, and dinner in the dining room started at 18:00. When I came there, there was nothing left, and Aunt Luda just shrugged her hands.

Nothing to do, I went to the room. Fortunately, an hour after dinner, the kefir was spread.

The grandmothers began to ask me heartbrokenly what I was doing in the chamber, because by 19:00 I was stable with my mom. I told the truth and I was just called for an injection.

When I arrived, there was a bunch of varied food on my table: apples, breasts, juice, a piece of cooked chicken, cabbage in a thermos and biscuits. At the same time, all the grandmothers were sitting with poker faces and pretending that Santa was just here.

My gratitude has no limits. I still remember that with great warmth. Per the oldest of them is no longer alive (as sad as it is), but I always wish them health, long years and the same kindness around. I sincerely try to comply.

In the year when I finished the medical universe, I had a lymph node on my neck. Closer to the public examinations, it reached an unfair size and I diagnosed myself with Hodgkin's lymphoma. Knowing that I am going to have a difficult and long treatment, I decided to first pass the session, and then begin to get examined. During this period, I was sure that the lymph node on the neck was not the only one, and that there were probably still whole packs of lymph nodes in the chest. I began to suffocate. I could no longer go up to the 3rd floor without breathing, I felt that something in my chest interfered and did not allow me to take a full breath. Even at night I woke up not able to breathe. So I lived for two weeks, successfully passed the graduation exams and started the examination. According to the results, it turned out that there are no pathological processes in the chest and the lymph node on the neck is the only one affected. When I learned this, the shortness of breath passed immediately and no longer bothered me.

P.S I guessed with the diagnosis, but it’s a different story :)

Just at work: A father and his son are sitting at the reception, about five years old (the son has just been treated with a tooth), then the dialogue:

(P) - You're crying again today, I won't go here with you anymore, you'll walk alone

I did not cry (offended)

P is yes? What did you do, I heard.

(C) - (after a short silence) I suffered

It is not uncommon when the "holy" well with "crystal-clean" water dried up after workers finally made a breakthrough in the sewerage or water pipeline nearby.

Haber, article on the rights of chimpanzees.

xxx: Chimpanzees should have the rights that incapable humans currently have.
yyy: If you are confused by the question, then they are quite capable (can serve themselves), and if desired and easy work they can be taught most likely (carrier, some farm work, cleaner, 1C programmer)

My grandmother talks to her girlfriend today:
There were no lines in the subway at the time. Only the stations.
Q: No, there were still branches!

xxx: I haven't entered Twitter for six months, now logged in, and there's a top-tweet from our media: "Since your previous visit, the situation, unfortunately, has not become better"
XXX is :(

It was like this, haha:

I met with one writer. Admired by his postmodernism and fun paschals and he was offended - he thought that everything was unique!

My ex-girlfriend called for her performance. I say later - you got a cool allusion to the <name of one of the pioneers of performance, the most famous>! It is me, and who is it? And then, according to the tradition of the gender was also offended.

From a topological point of view, the glass is always full of glass. The ball is homologous, and the water is always outside the glass.

<taftoos> BabDrive is a blog where women talk about cars. Only about cars. The authors of the blog Sister Nedjanova, Anja and Jan are the daughters of a car slider and a long-haul driver.
<Sifrael> from gay marriage?

Ride in a foreign project in the car.
Painted on a large scale, the length of the lines are calculated in thousands of points.
I notice on the side of the project the left lines, remove, stumble on any drawing garbage.
I go further and feel like I have met God.

The Unit! More than one unit size, but against the background of which the whole project merges into a point.
The yellow.

Here you laugh with the "bathers will not be, here you rubber boots", and yesterday I visited all of Moscow in search of swimsuits that are needed right here (today I passed the norms on jumping into the water in rescue vehicles, and at the last moment it turned out that last year’s swimsuits somewhere loved). It turned out that:
1st Ordinary men’s swimsuits today are exotic. Men’s swimwear stores only have swim shorts and maybe one or two swimwear options, but there won’t be your size. They say, demand is not used, no one is wearing them or buying them.
2nd In sports stores there are - from three thousand (as well - "professional") and again not all sizes.
Three Finding a non-online store on the Internet is almost impossible. In the online store you can not buy "outdoors".

I would like to have another programmer.
If anything, it is me.
YYY: You don’t have any basic knowledge of Python.
Well, yes, but I can always say something clever with a smart look. I am also guiding you.
Yyy: Class, now I have a boss and a manager.