Someday I will go through myself. At my age, I can’t wait for mercy. I sometimes look from the balcony and in the head "step and all..." and then I think about children (
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Do not despair like that. Stop this goat at all. Take care of the children and yourself. and well. May you have good luck, meet a decent person, get a good earning. Spend your energy on children, but never break away from them. It can still succeed. There is justice in the world and it will happen.