bezdna.su — the best quotes and jokes from the abyss!



[ + 35 - ]
 31.07.2015
The guest

Fifteen years have passed since my old friends, Kostya and Anna, finally decided to get married.
Both have been together for a million years. So what a million, their daughter Dasha, will go to school in September.
Of course, the wedding was not grand at all, only for their own. But, in any case, the bride in the expensive white dress, was blinding as a quarrel, and the bridegroom in the striped suit tried not to lag behind. Parents were especially pleased, they didn’t even hope.
We all wandered into a small room and lively waited, waiting for a aunt with an awkward voice and a red folder to solemnly call on the young people to respond.
There was a pause and a little Dasha, with an adult hair, asked loudly:

“Mommy, why are you marrying only today?
All my friends in the kindergarten, parents first met, then fell in love, then married, and only then gave birth to children. Why did you not marry immediately? Have you not loved each other yet?

The pause instantly conquered the whole room and became threateningly infinite.
The bride hardly stood on her heels and answered unclearly:

Daisy, what are you? Of course loved.
Why didn’t you get married before I was born?
A-A-A-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B- He will tell you everything.
Dad tell me.

Kostia stared predatorily at Anna, as the Kazakh sniper looked at Hitler, and, trying to be affectionate, replied:

“Dasha, I’m not interested in your nonsense now, please keep quiet, let’s get better later. Then we talk.

Dasha crossed her hands on her chest and was slightly swollen.
And the general pause with dangerous shootings of eyes did not let the present.
I had nothing left but to put my “five kopecks” in order to settle a roaring family scandal:

“Dasha, if you want to, I’ll tell you, why didn’t your parents marry many years ago?
I want to, tell me!
This is a very big secret, so they didn’t want to tell you. Ask, if they allow me, then I will reveal this secret to you anyway.

The girl ran to her mother and drowned in her wedding dress and said:

“Mom, Dad, let Uncle Grubas tell me everything!

Kostia and Anya looked at them with danger, but reluctantly sneered.
I continued :

- Well, then listen: once, very long ago, when your Dad and Mom just met and fell in love with each other, they were of course going to get married, even all the guests have already been called, but then they suddenly thought, "Well, someday in the future, we will have a child, a boy, and maybe even, if lucky, then a girl."

Dasha smiled and cried, confirming that she was just a girl.

“So this little girl will be born, grow up, grow up like you, and one day ask, ‘Mom, Dad, what was your wedding? The good? And what dress? The beautiful? What a cake? “The big?”
What would your parents be able to answer? “Yes, the wedding was fun, but it was so long ago that we don’t even remember, and the photos, unfortunately, were lost somewhere...”
And then, your Mom and Dad strongly thought, gathered all the guests and said, "Sorry, dear guests, but with the wedding we will have to endure another ten years, and all this for the sake of our future child. You will do nothing. But when this very child is born and grows up, then come and have fun.
We were all then, of course, a little upset, but there was nothing to do, so hungry and gone home, waiting for another ten years.
And here, Dasha, just today, exactly ten years have passed since then, you were born, grew up and now you can become a real guest at the wedding of your parents, to see everything with your own eyes. Is that not a miracle?

Dasha hanged on the neck of the bridegroom and bride and said:

“Mommy, Daddy, you are the best, most patient and most intelligent parents on earth. I love you very much.

Kostin's father unnoticed, but with a feeling touched my hand and even invited me to go fishing.
Source: http://www.anekdot.ru/an/an1507/o150730.html#5
Eng

The best quotes and jokes from the bezdna