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 07.02.2011
I look at the keyboard with the only remaining half-washed eye, the second sticky. It hurts in various places, a squadron of helicopters turns in the head. But time is now a wagon – all my previous stories I wrote on the run.

That night I got involved in a foolish fight and missed only one hit, the others swam free. I was looking forward to the next medical stage with curiosity – I heard a lot about the national project
"Health", but it wasn't necessary to cross with him - he was healthy like a cock. In principle, I got a little - hands and legs whole. Emergency medical care required only the rib, eye, nose and buttock as a whole - specifically hanged on it.

Traffic point at Utkinskaya was closest. There they explained to me that each of the affected points on my powerful body corresponds to a point on the map of the city of Vladivostok – the rib on Utkinskaya, the eye on the Fisherman’s Hospital, the nose on the First River and the bacon (neurosurgeon) in the Thousand-point. All four points are within a radius of eight kilometers from each other. All of them, according to the doctors, required urgent visits at the same time.
The telephone was absent. I am happy with my health and the weekend.
In working hours, a simple circumference of this magical ellipse could take five hours, not counting the queues in the trapoints themselves. That I was still silent about the jaw, or I would send somewhere to the fifth point.

After Utkinskaya I whispered. The waterman turned out to be a man of thirty years also of some sort of beaten. He explained that he is attending a section of the Russian handball battle. After a brief look at me and asking a few questions, he began to announce my detailed diagnosis, a list of medications and methods of treatment. He ended his thought with the fact that it was all shit, so they had a lot of #$%^$# in the section from the only missed hit. The only thing that worried him was my nose - the diagnosis of the vodla was small but multiple fractures, which can be easily treated - in general, he sent me to Laura and advised to score on the rest. Especially maliciously he spoke about the neurosurgeon - "he will knock on the knee, appoint sedatives, torture with repeated techniques, and he still has no spare brains..." I did not believe and spent the whole day on five doctors in total - the fifth was drawn, when the eyelid sent to the jaw-face surgeon, who was naturally still in a separate place. Each of them, after a lengthy examination, drafted prescriptions and medical conclusions for me, and in each I was shocked to recognize the speech of the conductors who carried me – with the only difference that all this bodyguard, examination-interrogation-notification of the sentence, took him half a minute without any special equipment. The second big difference was that in addition to the lost day, I almost broke the remaining bones on the ice that surrounded all these traumatic points – the hollow ice-traumatic point system looked like a single complex. I was not as scared of the fighting as the paths from the jaw-face to the X-ray of the Fisherman's Hospital - the ice hill crumbles there roughly ten floors down without any chains. What is called, delivery of victims in seconds.

The driver rightly called me even a type of antibiotic. Both doctors, who prescribed it, the doctor and the doctor, thought for a long time and hesitated before appointment. By the way, the bodyguard was called one of the prescribed medications that I heard about today for the first time in my life. My guide devoted much of his speech to the varieties of the body, discovering truly encyclopedic knowledge on the subject. Unfortunately, in my whipping head all this knowledge was quickly lost, but I will forever remember that the body of the body is angry. The only thing in which the driver did not cope with the role of all my doctors together, is in the work of the smart lore on the First River - well, so he sent me to him immediately.

Lor asked me for a long time about the original shape of my nose, and I seriously regretted not capturing my photos in the fas and profile.
It turns out that having lived with this nose all my life, I didn’t know about it!
At the end, Lor shrugged his hand and licked out my new nose to his taste. It was very painful, despite the freezing, but Laura proved to be an extra-sense.
From the sounds of his voice, the pain really disappeared.

Four previous doctors, by the way, were also very benevolent – all of them simultaneously touched my nose and expressed their hypotheses whether it was broken or not. The votes were divided by 2:2. The only one who did not touch my nose was the one accidentally met on the road. Should I say that he was right.

Today I understood how difficult it turns out to be to engage in the section of Russian handball fighting.
Source: http://www.anekdot.ru/an/an1102/o110206;1.html
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